Mall #24. Wholesome Littering Tattoo Artist Takes Smoke Breaks Hourly

My favorite mall in the Des Moines area for sightings had a pretty weak year.  Part of the problem is the mall was under construction most of the year for a new attraction that just finally opened the week before Christmas, and that probably reduced attendance for much of the year in a mall that’s been in general decline since I moved to central Iowa in 2006.  But the mall did have one recurring player that delivered for me through thick and thin nearly every time I visited the mall in 2014, and she was a worker at the tattoo and piercings store.  Now I’m no fan of tattoos or piercings and I’m sure the visual that comes to mind when I cite a worker at this place is a girl decorated with all kinds of hideous facial jewelry and body ink….but that couldn’t be further from the truth with the girl in question.  She is a 20-21ish light brunette who exudes wholesomeness in every way with a nicely sculpted female body to match.  There are no visible tattoos or piercings on her, so at the very least the most visible parts of her face and body have remain uncorrupted aside from the fact that she seems to be unnaturally tan for the dead of winter in Iowa, undoubtedly the result of tanning beds.  As for the noncorruption of her lungs, well that’s a different story….

It was last January I saw this girl at the rear mall entrance closest to her store out smoking with a co-worker, puffing on a cigarette while decked out in a nice red coat with leggings on the bottom, bending down at her knees while smoking and staying out of the cold winter wind.  I couldn’t believe this beautiful and wholesome girl was smoking and watched from afar as she chatted with the coworker and puffed away, producing generous exhales that were extra cloudy due to the cold weather and the smoke mixing with the frost on her breath.  She flung the cigarette obnoxiously onto the street before heading back into the mall and I walked on over and identified it as a Marlboro Red.  Less than two hours later, she was out again, this time by herself.  My presence didn’t go undetected as I sat on a curb watching from about 25 yards away, but I pretended to be waiting for somebody and largely got away with I suspect as I stole glances of her smoking at key moments, with the same impressive performance and wrapping things up with the same obnoxious butt fling into the street before heading back into the door, disregarding the ashtray no more than 10 feet away from her.  I don’t know what it is with these hot chick mall workers who insist upon defiling their workplace with their tobacco refuse but she is the third mall worker of the last two years whose made my countdown to dispose of their cigarettes this way and it never ceases to be unbearably hot.

Mall workers tend to come and go, especially at a store like this, but this girl has defined 2014 at this mall, and just about every trip I made there this year has produced sightings of her.  The downside is that I’ve become familiar to the point where I have to watch from afar so she doesn’t recognize me and confront me.  I would by no means be opposed to striking up a conversation with her, but if my repeated presence was put into question, I wouldn’t have a good answer.  I often get oil changes and basic car repairs done at the Sears Automotive in this mall but that excuse wouldn’t explain all of my visits there and why I’m hovering in the general area of outdoor entrances where she happens to be. Complicating things further, the construction zone was right at the epicenter of her old smoking area, so she found a different spot that is less accessible for her frequent smoke breaks.  And I do mean frequent!  There have been times I’ve gone to this mall for three hours and she has taken three smoke breaks.  I’m sure her coworkers just love her for abandoning them to run the store while she’s feeding her insatiable dependency on nicotine.

Every time I see her I’m struck by her wholesome beauty, often including headbands holding down her hair.  I’m not sure what is more out of place about this girl’s lifestyle based on her wholesome image….her heavy smoking habit and obnoxious butt disposal or the fact that she spends her days working at a tattoo and piercing store.  At some point mid-summer I saw she switched from Marlboro Reds to Camel Crush and at first when I went to inspect her discarded butt I wondered if I was looking at the wrong girl’s cigarette as I saw the smoldering Camel Crush, but subsequent encounters confirmed she had switched.  It was so hot roaming around the area where she always smoked and seeing her there again less than an hour since I saw her previously.  And making matters even wilder, I saw her later in the summer at the Iowa State Fair!  She was Sighting #72 on Day 3 of the 2014 ISF, chatting with friends and taking the final two drags of her all-white.  After she left, I approached and IDed it as her new brand Camel Crush, confirming it was indeed her.  Pretty sure she’s my first girl to broach two of my primary sightings mediums–malls and fairgrounds–in the same year.  Unfortunately even at the state fair my sighting of her was too brief and lacking in storyline to elevate her to the Hall of Fame where she deserves to be.

The last great encounter I had with her in 2014 was in November.  I saw a white car pulling towards the parking ramp and a hot girl with a cigarette in her hand behind the wheel who I quickly identified as my favorite mall employee of 2014.  I wanted a closer look and took the risk of approaching the ramp where she parked her car.  She was just getting out as I turned the corner, only about 10 yards in front of me and walking my direction, holding a bag of fast food she picked up for lunch in one hand and taking the final drag off of her Camel Crush with other before flinging it to the side.  She didn’t pass me closely enough to exchange greetings (or be confrontational for that matter) but it was spectacular watching her awesome ass in conservative dark jeans approach the rear mall entrance knowing how stinky she would be when she got into the store.  I looked at her Camel Crush smoldering there in the parking lot and wished I could have the kind of up-close inspection of one of her sightings that could catapult her into the upper reaches of my blog where she deserves to be if she produced a sighting with a worthy storyline.

My final observations of her came the weekend before Christmas when I spent several hours at this mall, but unfortunately it was a bust.  The downside of the heavy mall traffic the week before Christmas is that the nicotine-addicted workers don’t get to take smoke breaks.  But as I walked by her store, I picked up on her easygoing rapport with the customers checking out the cheap jewelry selection and wondered how hard it must have been for her to keep up her perky attitude going hours without a cigarette.  Her voice didn’t even have much of a husk to it, which surprised me given that she was clearly a pretty heavy smoker.  It was disappointing to not get a sighting from her on December 20, but it was also kind of cool to see her in this work setting being professional and knowing the only thing she was thinking about was her next nicotine fix. I don’t like getting too attached to these mall workers the way they come and go, but here’s hoping this girl sticks around and produces the sighting she’s capable of in 2015.


And in this case, she did return in 2015 to give me further insight into what she was capable of.  I was already having a good day fetishing at my favorite Des Moines area mall one Saturday in March 2015, having already seen the tattoo shop girl was working.  With that in mind, I made sure I was covering her usual smoking spot more frequently than usual in my exploratory pattern.  It paid off when I stepped out the entryway and saw the tanned dark blond beauty coming outside to smoke in the company of two tatted-up mid-20s guys who also work at the tattoo shop and were going out to smoke with her a lot in 2015, which is a mixed blessing as it keeps her more distracted and thus easier to stalk.

My dark blond smoker girl rarely dresses too revealingly and once again had a fairly conservative purple tanktop and dark jeans, but the tanktop was short enough that I saw peeks of bare midriff when she walked around.  The upside was that she had her back to me so I got to check out her ass but the downside was that I didn’t directly see much of her smoking.  It was sunny and I was out of the wind at this spot so it felt downright warm by the standards of early spring in the Upper Midwest.  I caught about 90 seconds of the show before they went inside and while I thought I saw her pollute her butt I didn’t see exactly where and as I warned the area, looking for a Camel Crush butt as that’s what I know she switched to from Marlboro Reds the prior summer, I didn’t see any Crushes lingering.  I was a little annoyed over what I expected would be an ongoing logistics problem with her at this smoking spot and how I might not get a really good vantage point for an extended sighting again even with as frequently as she’s out there smoking almost every time I’m at this mall.

Fast forward about less than an hour later when I always circle the mall in my car a few times before I leave and sometimes that yields the moment of the day.  This would be one of those days.  As I rounded the corner in my car I could see a cluster of young people near my favorite exit and was pretty confident the dark blond would be one of them….and she was…smoking another cigarette less than an hour after her last and vacating her post at work yet again!  She was with her usual two guys as well as well as another girl who I saw her out smoking with a month earlier who’s only averagely attractive.  But sitting against the wall (everybody else was standing) was the main attraction girl.  I lamented another brief sighting of her when I noticed something ahead… obscure set of handicapped parking stalls that would give me a solid and isolated vantage point, albeit looking over my left shoulder.  Given that I’d only be stopping for a few minutes, I figured it was worth the risk and I pulled in there, and my reward was one of my most thorough sightings of the tattoo shop girl yet….

Her drags were copious and impressive, her hold times were all in the five-second range, and her exhales were all sweet little numbers of smoke expulsions exploding from her gorgeous mouth and nose.  From afar it looked like she was down to her last few drags but she kept coming for more and I got to see a good dozen drags, all very nicely timed as she’s not the kind of girl who makes you wait to see her consume her cancerous filth….not that she has a choice in the matter given how dependent her young body is on nicotine.  And I was most curious about what came last, and she didn’t disappoint.  The girl was literally leaning right up next to the “smoker’s pole” ashtray….but after taking her final drag she boorishly flung the butt several feet to her left.   She was also the first to finish her cigarette of the group and I wanted to identify that butt, so I decided to pull out of the handicapped parking spot and drive laps through parking lanes until they all went inside.  After a couple of laps they did and I parked my car along the curb and IDed the stinky remains of her cigarette.  There’s a reason I couldn’t find a Camel Crush butt earlier….she’s switched to regular cork filter Camels, making this her third brand of the last 12 months.  This girl could smoke generics and I’d still love her though…

I continued to see the dark blond on cigarette breaks almost hourly whenever I went to this mall and it was a day she was working.  I remember seeing her smoke three cigarettes one day midsummer sitting on the curb outside that entrance, always flipping her butt into the street when she was done with zero regard for littering laws or basic manners.  She’d occasionally go out on coworkers for her smoke breaks and I’d often see them using the ashtrays and smoker poles…but not her.  She’d pollute her butts no matter what and in front of anybody.

So the final phase of this story comes in mid-September when I went on a pilgrimage to the more upscale mall in the Des Moines area.  There’s a department store on the east side of the mall and I walked outside the mall’s northeast exit early in the afternoon and saw this decently attractive early 20s light brunette on the phone and out on a smoke break.  I knew she was a mall worker but positioned myself in the wrong spot when I saw her go into the department store when I figured she’d be going somewhere else.  Fast forward to an hour later when I went out the same exit.  This time there are two girls on this bench smoking.  One of them was the aforementioned department store girl from an hour earlier, and even though I was a little too far away to appreciate details, the second girl who was considerably hotter decked out in her all-black work outfit just had an air of familiarity to me from the get-go.  I sat down on a bench and she was staring at me with this smirk on her face as if I looked familiar to her too.  Again though, I couldn’t see her features closely enough and found it odd that I would be busted for stalking a smoker girl literally two seconds after laying eyes on them.  I watched her take two final drags and that’s when it happened…..she pitched the cigarette airborn across the sidewalk into the street.  I had seen this smoking style from one girl and one girl only quite a bit in the last year or so.  She and the friend then turned around and went back into the department store, and watching the way she walked while also observing the way her light brown/dark blond hair and ponytail swung around en route to the indoors, I was 99% sure it was her……

Apparently the chainsmoker from the tattoo shop either got a second job at this department store at the mall on the other side of town or else quit the tattoo shop.  I was 99% certain it was her but went inside the department store moments after she went in to see if I could find her…..and I did.  It was 100% without a doubt the tattoo shop girl, who has now brought her ferocious nicotine addiction, piggish manners, and nasty smell to the upscale mall on the other side of town.  Unbelieveable!  I visited the spot many more times on Saturday on foot and by car but never saw her again and this revelation does come with a downside.  Any sort of awkward confrontation that may have ensued when I was stalking her at the other mall could have been written off within the context of me having work done on my car at Sears Automotive.  Half of the time it was true.  But having seen me now at both malls, I have no excuse and she must know I’m stalking malls for a specific reason.  In that sense I wish she’d have stayed at the other mall.  But if she has to be gone from the tattoo shop, I was at least glad she at least is within the sphere of Des Moines area malls where I would theoretically keep seeing her…..

Except I didn’t.  I have not seen again at the new mall in a handful of additional visits and nor has she returned to the tattoo shop at the other mall.  I suppose I could just have bad timing at the department store, but I figure the new gig just didn’t work out for her for whatever reason…possibly her insistence on being out on smoke breaks constantly.  I’ve already seen this girl chainsmoking at two Des Moines mall and once at the 2014 Iowa State Fair so I suspected that I hadn’t seen the last of her but the brakes came on in 2016 and I haven’t seen her since September 2015, which is more than a little disappointed.

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