In the moments before dusk on my successful Wednesday evening visit to the 2012 Iowa State Fair, I had a choice to make as I was already observing an impressive sighting of a hot young mother smoking in the presence of her young daughter when a new set of girls caught my eye heading the other direction. It was a tough decision, but I decided in favor of the younger girls and undoubtedly ended up making the right decision.
The sighting began impressively enough but I wouldn’t have guessed it would have morphed into the best sighting of the night as it did. The storyline began with two approaching 17ish girls wielding cigarettes and progressing down the block with a strikingly confident air about them. They were solid cuties, one an 8 and the other an 8.5, but they weren’t dripping with IT factor. One was a blond wearing a pink top and lighter-colored jean shorts, but the cuter of the two was a light brunette in a turquoise tanktop and dark jean shorts. After witnessing their extended approach as they walked eastward, I began following them and managed to follow very closely. Their smoking styles were impressive enough, but what impressed most was, for whatever reason, the stink. Not sure what this duo’s secret was, and it was probably just the right location on my part, but their exhales all drifted right into my face and standing at a diagonal rear position from them, the aura of cigarette stench never abated for even a second as my olfactory senses were under a sustained and merciless assault. And at some point during this observation it struck me that this light brunette bore a striking resemblance to a 2001-era Dana, my most serious girlfriend. No sooner did I make that observation than a 2001 Dana storyline began to play out right before my eyes.
From out of nowhere, two perfectly respectable-looking nonsmoking teenage dudes showed up and immersed themselves directly in the girls’ company greeting them with the opening line of “you guys heading to that concert?”. I could only hear bits and pieces of the conversation and the girls were clearly loving the attention. After about 30 seconds of light conversation, the guys finally introduced themselves. My eyes were focused on the light brunette, and studying her face I could easily detect romantic interest which the psychology books tell you is evident by a certain squintiness in a girl’s eyes. The guy outstretched his hand as he said his name, which was inaudible in the crowd and the girl, who had just taken a drag from her cigarette, outstretched her hand to respond in kind, and through a talking exhale said her name, which I sadly didn’t catch. The look on her face took me back to August 1, 2001, and Dana when I introduced myself to her at the fair as at that exact moment she was the spitting image of Dana.
The lingering cigarette stench in the area produced by these girls continued to be absolutely dominating, but it was pretty obvious that it was catnip to these young male, nonsmoking suitors as it was to me…..and the girls made no effort at all to downplay the fact that they were addicted cigarette smokers enjoying a cigarette despite what might have been an instinct to downplay their smoking when being courted by nonsmoking guys. I was intensely focused on the light brunette to the point of ignoring the blond who was being courted by the other guy, save for when one of the blond’s stinky exhales hit me in the face and demanded to be noticed. The brunette took a final drag from her cork filter cigarette before obnoxiously flinging it right past the guy to her left…the smoldering cigarette soaring through the air amidst this large crowd and landing in the middle of the street about 10 feet away, not hitting anybody entirely as a function of luck. I was easily able to walk over and identify the butt and even though it was smoked close to the filter, I could see by the light coloring of a capital letter M that it was a Marlboro Red.
The two couples continued to walk eastward and converse and I was absolutely thrilled for these guys that they might get lucky with these incredibly sexy underage girls later in the night. I left the scene after they finished their cigarettes and drifted to the heavily populated area around the seating for the Hunter Hayes concert, and about 10 minutes after the concert had started, who did I come across but Dana’s doppelganger and her blond friend walking the other direction apparently leaving the concert, only this time alone as apparently they had already parted ways with the guys. That made me a little sad, but I was grateful to see them again even though they weren’t smoking, knowing what they were capable of. And for a while it seemed like these girls were following me as for the next 10 minutes or so they were always close by as I spotted them again shortly after buying Pepsi from a machine. I lingered for a few minutes hoping they might smoke again. They didn’t, but were randomly approached by another guy who they chatted with briefly. There were prettier girls at the fair last night but for whatever reason, guys found this duo irresistible.
But these girls still weren’t done with me and gave me an epic going-away gift several hours later in the final 20 minutes or so before closing time. Seated on a bench I noticed from afar while walking the concourse two familiar faces…my favorite-of-the-night girls who were getting hit on by the guys when I first saw them. Some things never change as now there was a shirtless teenage guy sitting in between the two girls. The blond sat there on the right, left to her own thoughts as the guy was not coming on to her. It was kind of sad seeing her emotionless face knowing she was jealous of her prettier friend getting all the attention. But I couldn’t be sad for her for long as I looked past her to the Dana lookalike brunette who was being heavily courted by this nonsmoking guy….as she was in the final throes of another cigarette herself. I didn’t get a good look at the guy for obvious reasons but he wasn’t one of the random guys hitting on her earlier. Yet again this girl draws nonsmoking guys to her like bees to honey. Either all of these guys are operating under a “she smokes, she pokes” philosophy or they all have the smoking fetish.
Whatever the case, they weren’t officially making out in the form of open-mouth kisses but they were in an erotic state of passionate bliss pressing against each other. She took a final drag from her cigarette and, just like before, tossed it several feet in front of her. The grounds were empty enough at this point that there was no fear of her hitting somebody with the airborne butt, but the obnoxiousness of it was still sexy. Sexier yet was the 2012 version of Mark and Dana playing out in front of my face as these two were all over each other, her fresh ciggy stench driving this nonsmoking guy to the highest level of eroticism and the look of pleasure and passion evident on her face, making me seriously wonder if they were gonna bed down in the moments after leaving the fairgrounds. The deja vu factor made the smile on my face even wider as I walked by. They were gone the next time I walked by, quite possibly exchanging bodily fluids while she smoked. Fantastic!