I had only nine sightings on the night at around 10:30 on my Friday night at the 2011 local fair, running behind my baseline, and even though the rain coming down in modest sprinkles wasn’t particularly strong, it was nonetheless thinning down the crowd some. It was starting to look like it was gonna be yet another night of fewer sightings than the previous night when I ran into another of my cousins and her husband. We chatted for about 10 minutes, and I was obviously scanning the surrounding crowds to see if I was missing anything. Thankfully I didn’t miss what was next as I looked straight into a foursome of college age girls where the stand-out-in-the-crowd face was a glamorous long-haired bleach blond who was inserting a cigarette into her mouth and lighting up. Next to her was a brunette who was extracting a cigarette from an unidentifiable pack herself. I have never withdrawn myself from a conversation as quickly as I did with my cousin tonight.
After basically walking away from my cousin and her husband midsentence, I had to finnagle my way through a small crowd to catch up with my new favorite foursome. Once again, first catching my eye was the bleach blond who I was only able to see from behind as she exhaled a couple of drags, but the girls would soon settle into a cluster in the most opportune spot right in front of this burm that I’ve used many times before to sit and watch a sighting play out. I had the most incredible front-row seat for my biggest blockbuster of the night.
I finally got a good look at the blond, who was pretty but stood out in the crowd of beauties mostly because of that flashy long blond hair. But the sighting was about to take a turn for the better when she handed the cigarette to the girl next to her, a girl I hadn’t even really noticed in the group up to that point since she wasn’t in possession of a cigarette. But now she was possessing a cigarette and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. It was a “curvy” light brunette with curly hair, a flattering white top, and a pair of black shorts. Now “curvy” is often a euphemism for overweight, but in this girl’s case, curvy has nothing but good connotations. She’ll most likely struggle with her weight after she has kids, but for now the ample breasts stretching out that white top and especially the buxom caboose draped in those sexy black shorts were just screaming to be caressed. But more than anything else, this girl’s best feature was her absolutely beautiful face. She looked like Cindy Crawford’s daughter with a certain exotic look and very tanned features. Even before observing the first drag, I wanted to have sex with this girl….
But then she took her first drag and I wanted to have sex with her more. I must confess when I first saw this foursome I was thinking “social smokers”…and considering the blond surrendered the cigarette and never got it back after about three drags she probably was. But curvy girl was very clearly no social smoker as evidenced by the frequency and intensity of her drags….and most adorably, her messy exhales which were basically belched out of her mouth and nose straight into the huddle…and she made absolutely no attempt to protect anybody from her secondhand smoke. All of her exhales were like this, and I even caught one talking exhale, always with smoke sloppily spilling from her face and drifting wherever it happened to drift. What a sexpot!
And amidst all this I had almost forgotten that there was another smoker in this group, a hot slender brunette in jeans who lit up right away with the bleach blond girl back when the sighting began. Now she was smoking her cigarette more slowly and wasn’t really cutting it for me since she was in the presence of greatness with this curvy girl in the black shorts. The curvy girl finally dropped her cigarette to the wet pavement and stepped on it, allowing me to focus a little more on this long-haired dark brunette who was still wielding a cigarette. She had failed to make an impression so far but she definitely made up for it with a DOUBLE dangling drag, followed by an exhalation of smoke right over the head of the only nonsmoker in the group, who looked like she was probably part Asian. It wasn’t a skybound exhale….it literally sailed directly over the other girl’s head, whether by accident or by design.
Thankfully the girls pressed forward from there and I was able to easily spot the shared cigarette that was mostly consumed by that epic curvy girl in the black shorts. It was a Camel Crush. I attempted to catch up with the foursome to identify the other brunette’s cigarette brand as well but by the time I found them her cigarette was gone. Not long after I’d see these girls in line for the beer gardens. I would have guessed them 19 or 20 but wasn’t surprised that they were just over the threshold and 21 years old. Whatever their age, they sure raised the stakes of my Friday night at the county fair.