Summerfest #3. A Familiar Face Performing A Dangle For The Ages


This encounter spanned two nights at Summerfest in 2010.  I walked to Summerfest on Thursday evening, its first night, and was depressed to see virtually no smoking occurring as I traversed the grounds, and prominent “NO SMOKING” signs posted all over inside the beer gardens.  After more than an hour walking around the grounds, I was finally about to get my first sighting of significance when a cluster of early-to-mid 20s hotties who I had seen on the grounds earlier and had been impressed by all walked outside the beer gardens fence to an area near the port-a-potties that they must have assumed was a designated smoking area.

All but one of the girls in this cluster was cute, but there was a very attractive blond that impressed me the most and who had an air of familiarity to her appearance that I couldn’t put a finger on.  She fired up a cigarette along with the other three girls but within a couple of minutes, a police officer standing at the beer gardens gate came over to tell them the entire grounds was smoke-free and if they wanted to smoke they had to go way off onto an obscure parking lot a block away.  The girls did just that and I was absolutely furious for the short-term of having this sighting taken away from me and even more for the long-term that Summerfest as a venue was on the verge of being taken away from me.  I was so steaming mad that I fired off an e-mail that night to the Chamber of Commerce in charge of Summerfest telling them to call off their pit bulls or I was gonna boycott the venue with my “friends coming down from out of state”.  I got a snotty response the next morning and had zero confidence of what the rest of the week had in store for me.

But strangely enough, it was a completely different world the next night.  The crowd was twice as large, people were smoking everywhere with reckless abandon, and the cops were no longer even chasing away people smoking right in front of their eyes the way they were the night before.  I had already scored two blockbusters before stumbling into this little number….

Out of the corner of my eye while tracking another girl, I saw a familiar looking cabal of females, including a blond who was extracting a cigarette from her purse.  As I approached to get a closer look, I realized it was the same foursome of friends from Thursday night, the college cuties who went out for a smoke but were then ordered to go across the street by the police.  Only this time, they weren’t paying attention to any damn smoking ban and were gonna light up right there on the grounds.

One by one, the other three girls, who were all decked out in summer dresses tonight, got out their cigarettes as well.  As I said in the previous night’s sighting there was one bona fide bombshell in the group.  Well she was there again, decked out in a very revealing and flattering brown summer dress, and unintentionally dominated the sighting with a fairly dramatic light-up that set the stage for what was to come.  My eyes focused on her, and the lighter glowed like a beacon and drew my attention directly to her face as she brought her all-white cigarette to life.  Now even in the previous night there was a déjà vu factor with this girl, but with that flicker of fire that glowed in front of her face, I finally recognized where.  I’d say there’s a good 70% odds that this was the same blonde from my third best Summerfest sighting of all-time….the 19-20-year-old college girl who smoked three cigarettes in a half hour back in 2007.  Well, now she’d be 22-23, and looked it.  She was still beautiful but had an undeniable long-time heavy smoker’s look with the weathered party girl face and heavy makeup application that are telltale signs…..

This epiphany was amazing enough, but what came next made it even better.  She had just lit her cigarette and took the first couple of drags, but now it was time to check her text messages.  She inserted the freshly lit all-white into the extreme right hand corner of her mouth and then reached inside her purse for her phone letting the cigarette dangle…and dangle….and dangle.   I counted…..it lasted more than 90 seconds, perched so far in the corner of her mouth that it must have taken all her facial muscles to keep it from falling out.

But amazingly, it got even better.  She was so elated reading her text that she had to share it with her friends….and she began excitedly talking to them……while STILL in the midst of her dangle!  The cigarette barely hanging on in the corner of her mouth was now bouncing up and down as she vocally relayed the message of the text to her friends.  As a nonsmoker, I can’t even begin to imagine the amount of skill and experience as a smoker it must require to speak with a cigarette in your mouth like this.  If there was any doubt that this girl was as hard-core of a smoker as has ever lived, the doubt ended right there.  I hung around for another couple of minutes but nothing seemed capable of topping that talking dangle, so I decided I was gonna call it a night and end on a high note….but Summerfest wasn’t done with me yet…..

This specific sighting ended at that point, but  from there it would be no more than 15 seconds before I walked right into my #5 Summerfest sighting of all-time with two more adorable danglers.  That’s a lot of feminine dangling for one night.

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