2014 Local County Fair


Tuesday Night

Everything was in place for a fantastic beginning to my local county fair on Tuesday night.  I had a fantastic weather forecast, I had the folks’ place to myself for a few days as they were on vacation when I came home, and my usual sweetheart arrangement of parking in my grandma’s garage each day and walking across the street to the fairgrounds.  Most years I’m giddy as a schoolgirl as I make that hike to enter the fairgrounds for the first time, but I had a problem this year.  I was sick.  It was a combination of a fever and a gut ache which I had picked up the previous night, most likely as a low-level food poisoning from that evening’s takeout barbecue meal.  It wasn’t a fully debilitating bout of sickness but it did work to kill the mood some as I proceeded to the gate at 5:30 that evening to kick off the 2014 summer fair season.

Thankfully, the mood was restored before I even got into the fairgrounds because I scored my first fairgrounds sighting of the year earlier than I’d ever got my first fairgrounds sighting of any fair.  This mid-to-late 20s late brunette of modest attractiveness wearing a tanktop and jeans was standing between two trailers just inside the fairgrounds fence as I walked by and lit up a cigarette.  I didn’t get to see a lot of her as I walked past, but considering my typical observation is that little happens at my county fair smoking-wise until after dark, this precedent of a first sighting before even entering the grounds was a beautifully encouraging one.

And those early expectations were generally lived up to.  For several years now, I’ve been having a fantastic opening night at my county fair.  Last year’s 35-sighting haul on opening night was particularly huge and not to be repeated, but I felt pretty damn excited to finish opening night with 28 sightings this year.  There were the usual slow patches during the day and, as expected, the hour or so that followed entering the gate was one of them.  I resigned myself to simply enjoying the spectacle of so many adorable girls dressed like streetwalkers and I often run into some familiar faces at this small county fair which produces a lot of returning participants year after year.

Regarding smoker girls, there were at least three returning favorites that night, two of whom were not smoking at least at the time.  One immediately recognizable face was the brunette with the tall hair and the head band who is my lifetime FCF #34.  In 2012, this girl was about 17 and smoking a cigarette on the midway and getting a kiss from her nonsmoking boyfriend before he pressed on.  And in 2013, I briefly saw the same girl sharing a cigarette with three guys.  Thus far in 2014 there has been no smoking from her but there is a development that could prove epic if I do see her light up…..she’s about eight months pregnant.  I saw her twice on the grounds last night, neither time smoking, but given that my local county fair produces at least one pregnant smoker sighting every year, there is real hope that I will stumble across this girl puffing away in the upcoming four days.  The fact that her uniquely attractive looks have held up perfectly despite being so far along in her pregnancy would make it all the more exciting.

Holding up less well was another all-time favorite I saw in the midway not too long after….4-H Tonya (FCF #18), the tall blond wearing white shorts from 2010 who was about 18 at the time and smoking with a hot friend outside the 4-H building.  She was now in her early 20s and pushing a stroller in line for midway tickets.  While she was still attractive, the pudge that was kind of fittingly hot for her in 2010 had grown, as it usually does, and she had some serious thunder thighs now.  She didn’t smoke either of the two times I ran into her on Tuesday night, and even if she had, it wouldn’t have been the same.  The third familiar face is coming at the very end of my writeup, but unfortunately I should prepare you all now for what I suspect will be a huge disappointment for a blog favorite.

My friend Corey, who was at a horse show in Kansas City during fair week in 2013, called me two weeks before this year’s fair to say that he would indeed be attending this year and would be doing so solo as his wife would be going to the horse show without him.  Corey has at times been a cockblock when it comes to seeing great sightings play out and there’s incredible danger that he will this year, and I got my first reminder of that when I saw him standing on Machinery Hill only a half hour or so after my arrival.  He was looking at his phone when I saw him and I just had a feeling a call was coming my way any second.  Sure enough, my phone went off and he wanted to meet right then.  I agreed and approached him.  Thankfully, he at least didn’t force me to wade through sightings-free livestock buildings as he has some years in the past but as we roamed the grounds talking I wasn’t fully engaged in sightings and wouldn’t be able to focus on them if I came across one.  The first example of this came in between two buildings on the south side of the ground where an attractive short-haired brunette was smoking a cigarette sitting next to her nonsmoking boyfriend.  It’s not like I missed out on anything too earth-shattering when we walked past them without stopping, but it frightened me that at some point I would be forced to miss something great.  Luckily, hours later, I’d see this short-haired brunette again on the grounds, once again smoking in the presence of the wholesome boyfriend who wasn’t touching the stuff.

There was about an hour to kill wandering the grounds and getting food before they let people into the grandstand for the 8:30 show.  I still wasn’t feeling great and knew it was a giant gamble to get one of the county fair gyros I love so much.  While I didn’t ralph, it did end up being a mistake as that thing didn’t set well at all with me for the rest of the night and into the morning. The upside was that while standing in line for the gyro, a young couple with a stroller was in front of me.  The early 20s mom was petite and modestly attractive in her tanktop and shorts.  And at the top of the stroller she was pushing was a pack of Marlboro Menthols and a lighter.  My rule of thumb is that if there’s just cause to believe a girl is a smoker, I count it as a sighting even if she’s not lighting up at the moment.  Thankfully I’d get my confirmation later in the night when I saw the girl smoking.

After purchasing the gyro, I headed up to my favorite spot in the grandstand overlooking the smoking area and the beer gardens with Corey following me.  When I first started sitting in this spot back in 2009-2010, it seemed to be overflowing with younger smokers.  On some occasions, the fenced-in beer gardens area is, but the smoking area itself seems to mostly produce middle-aged and overweight smokers anymore.  It’s a sign of the times I suppose, indicative of how many fewer attractive young women and girls are smoking now even compared to five years ago.  And the area (combined with the beer gardens on the other side of the chain-link fence) produced a handful of sightings tonight over the course of the two hours or so I sat there before and during the concert by country music newcomer Eric Paslay….

One was a slender late 20s blond in a pink T-shirt and tight pale blue jeans who lit one up inside the beer gardens.  Another was an early 30s Americanized-looking Asian gal with a nonsmoking white boyfriend/husband who was bopping along to the music inside the beer gardens when she fired one up.  But the best girl by far who I saw inside the beer gardens smoking was this gorgeous long-haired mid-20s blond in a long black dress.  Unfortunately, she was immersed in a tight pack of people in the middle of the beer gardens and it was hard to get a good look at her.  But on three different occasions, there was just enough of an opening to see her take a drag and it was very nice every time I got to witness.  Later in the night, I saw this girl upclose outside of the beer gardens.  She wasn’t smoking but it was great to confirm that she was as wholesome and as beautiful as I suspected when I saw her from afar smoking inside the beer gardens.

The Eric Paslay show was a surprisingly low-energy affair, so much so that Corey told me halfway through he was tired and heading home early.  This was music to my ears since I wouldn’t have to worry about him shadowing me after the show.  I bid Corey adieu and only about 10 minutes later decided to depart myself, exploring the grounds for smoker girls now that it was well after dark when the stinky girls typically finally start making an appearance at my fair.  I stayed within earshot of the grandstand until the show ended so I could hear the rest of the songs Paslay sang, but when he wrapped up, it was time to head down into the midway.  Right away, I took note of this family that included a very sweet-looking mid-teen light brunette daughter wearing a below-the-belt ensemble that grabbed my attention.  She was wearing a skin-tight pair of tight jeans in a way that only a mid-teen girl can and had a pair of black leather boots with a high heel that snugly wrapped around her lower legs.  The thought of smoking never even crossed my mind so I pressed on into the midway….

Finally I started to put together some sightings as I saw from the rear this attractive ponytailed brunette with a cigarette between her fingers accompanied by a husband/boyfriend and a young son who looked about three years old.  She looked great from the rear in a conservative black sweatshirt and tight dark jeans, and I got to see her take two drags as she approached a carnival stand with the son, dropping the cigarette to the ground and crushing it out before turning to the carnival worker to play a game with the son.  I finally was able to see her face and she very much lived up to expectations with a wholesome face that matched the outfit.  Of all the young mommies I saw at the fair last night, she would have been one of the last ones I would have expected of being a smoker.  As soon as I had an opening, I knelt down and IDed her discarded butt…..and was very impressed that my hard-core mommy was smoking a Marlboro Red.  Methinks this kid has a smoking fetish in his future.

I migrated further into the midway and noticed an 18ish brunette wielding an unlit cigarette.  She was decently attractive, decked out in a sweatshirt and dark jeans and looked as though she might be at least half Latina, but she was conversing with people and after a few minutes of lingering it was clear she wasn’t gonna be smoking the cigarette any time soon.  Thankfully, I was lucky enough to be around about a half hour later when she did light it up, standing in front of the fairgrounds’ primary bathroom complex with a mixed-gender group of friends in which she was the only one smoking.  She was a solid smoker too and even though the stalking logistics weren’t great, I got to see a good five or six drags which were all lengthy and with cloudy exhales.  She was definitely worth the wait.

But going back in time a bit to right after I spotted the last girl with the unlit cigarette in the midway, I ventured back the direction I came from in the midway and saw the sighting of the night–and the girl to beat for the entire fair at this point–and she was a familiar face and a familiar lower body.  The mid-teen girl in the tight jeans with the form-fitting black leather boots was actually smoking….in the company of her family!  I was kicking myself for not being around for the light-up on this one, but as sick as I was it was probably for the best or my poor feverish body might have collapsed if I had been present to see this most unlikely mid-teen light brunette cutiepie, whose face was every bit as adorable and as unlikely to be a smoker as her tight and relatively petite young body, light up a cigarette.  What made this sighting most fascinating was the family dynamics.  On the bench was the 15-16ish daughter and the nonsmoking dad.  Mom was lingering to the side, and in front of the bench was a lanky, awkward 18-19ish older brother who was also smoking a younger sister who looked about 10.  Neither parent was smoking yet the two kids publicly were, including the underage daughter.  She had yet to take a drag but just seeing her sit there with the half-smoked cork filter so close to those tight jeans almost made my knees buckle….

But then she did take that first drag and it was spectacular, ingesting a good four seconds worth of smoke before tilting her head up with a pleasured look on her face and exhaling skyward….straight into the face of her baby sister who was standing there.  I’m assuming that was an accident, but nothing was said by way of disgust by the younger sister or of apology by the smoker girl.  Any doubt that I had stumbled into an FCF classic was now removed.  It was dark and I didn’t want to tell on myself by turning my camera flash on, but I still had to get a snapshot of this.  The photo is blurry but it will nonetheless preserve this moment in time forever more.  The family began noticing my awkward lingering presence so I had to venture a small distance away to an open bench that still provided me a nice vantage point to her remaining drags.  Nobody got it in the face from her subsequent exhales but they were still a pure joy to watch, especially knowing she had the freedom to smoke in the immediate presence of her parents.  All too quickly, the show ended with a final drag.  She bent over and stubbed out the cigarette for a few seconds on the pavement below the bench, and only then sat upright again, tilted her head skyward with a look of pleasure on her face, and released another beautiful smoke missile into the night sky.  As down as I sometimes get about the decline of smoking in modern culture, the fact that a sighting like this can still play out at my county fair in the year 2014 means I’ll still have a few good days to come in this life.  The family got up and left a few moments later and I zipped on over to check out her discarded cigarette butt.  It was a full-flavor Marlboro Menthol.

And while the smoking part of this sighting was done, I’d see the brother and sisters several more times Tuesday evening and it filled in a couple blanks regarding the context.  The brother and sister were sitting on a bench quietly outside the beer gardens the next time I saw them, and I figured they must have been waiting for the parents inside the beer gardens.  It was such a joy to see that innocent-looking girl in her tight jeans and boots sitting there and knowing she was an addicted cigarette smoker.  On my next pass, all three kids were lingering near the beer gardens entrance and the dad was talking to them out the door, asking about “their mother” and confirming that this was a family dynamic as suspected.  The dad then proceeded to fork over some money to the kids, with my favorite girl en route to picking up a “walking taco”.  I wouldn’t see them again that night but am very hopeful for sightings of her later this week.  She’ll have a hard time finding a more perfect outfit to contrast with her smoker girl reality in the days ahead, however.  I tell you she was enough to make a sick man well again.

I wouldn’t hit a high note like that again for the rest of the night, but my very next sighting would be my second best of the evening.  I was hovering in the back of the midway amidst a crowd of young people looking and sniffing around for any sign of exhaled cigarette smoke.  But out of the range of my nose off to the side was where I would hit the jackpot.  A duo of 21ish girls was wielding freshly lit cigarettes.  One girl was unattractive and overweight but the other girl was an absolute angel, a long-haired blond wearing a stylish denim jacket over a summery black dress.  It is impossible to convey how wholesome this girl was.  She looked like she should be doing commercials for skim milk rather than dragging on an all-white cigarette at the back of the county fair midway.  Her smoking style lacked bells and whistles but she was a sexy and accomplished smoker, taking nice drags and exhaling very precise exhales through her mouth.  But the highlight of this sighting was that face….sweet Jesus this girl did not look like a smoker in the least.  Out of all the people over 18 at the FCF, she may have been the last person I would have predicted would smoke.  I observed the show from an open bench and the one downside of the sighting was that the fat friend sometimes lingered directly in the line of vision and I didn’t see everything, but I still got to see about 80% of it.  After a good five minutes of very nice smoking, she dropped the cigarette to the grass, crushed it out and approached the line for the “Ring of Fire” carnival ride where another nonsmoking friend was holding the smokers’ place in line.  I walked over to where they were standing while smoking and found two Camel Lights butts in the grass.  A half hour or so later, I saw the three friends stepping on to another carnival ride and again was in disbelief that THIS BLOND BEAUTY was addicted to Camel Lights.  As badly as I felt, I was running on pure adrenaline after seeing these two excellent sightings back to back.

Exiting the midway and heading down one of the main avenues, I’d soon get another quality sighting when I spotted a trio of 19-20ish dudes in the company of a hot blond.  Now this blond wasn’t the classic beauty the last girl was, but her gray tanktop and dark jean shorts covering a perfect ass was my kind of summer outfit, especially when she was holding an unlit cigarette in her hand.  I followed them to an isolated seating area outside a closed-down-for-the-night 4-H food stand where the girl and one of the guys sparked up their cigarettes.  It was adorable seeing her put her legs up on the barrier in front of her as she sat on the bench smoking.  Unfortunately, I strongly suspect I was spotted early and often glaring at this group as I caught them making eye contact with me several times.  After a few moments of this they got up and left.  I stealthly walked around a building and kept tabs on them for a bit, but eventually they walked out of sight.  The logistics just weren’t good enough on this one which was unfortunate because the girl was impressive.

I only had one female e-cigarette sighting last night but unfortunately it was a heartbreaker.  This very wholesome looking light brunette in a tanktop and jean shorts amidst a friend’s group was dragging copiously off of one of them ugly vaporizers.  Watching the vapor exhaled through her nose, I shook my head in disgust at what a waste this was.  Thankfully, there was little additional evidence that these things are catching on among my preferred demographic.

Next to impress was another wholesome early 20s brunette who I saw from the rear with smoldering cigarette in hand.  She was in the company of another nonsmoking boyfriend.  Her cigarette was near its end so I only got to see a couple of drags from the rear before she knelt down and crushed it out on the pavement before tossing the butt into a nearby garbage can, denying me the butt ID.  Most intriguing about this girl was her outfit, a red top with a very feminine denim skirt that was more puffy than tight.  It definitely didn’t look like the outfit a smoker girl would wear to the fair.  She progressed into a more lighted region of the grounds walking hand and hand with the nonsmoking boyfriend and forcing him to choke on her fresh cigarette stench.  It was time for me to pace ahead and get a good look at her face.  She was decently attractive but certainly not stop-traffic gorgeous.  Still didn’t look like a smoker though.  And definitely her most memorable accessory was that girly girl denim skirt.

Bad logistics again short-circuited the next sighting, which featured an adorably tiny 17ish ponytailed blond in a white top and pale blue jean shorts standing amidst a group of nonsmoking female friends with a mostly smoked cork filter in hand.  The girl was more “cute” than “hot”–standing no more than 5’1″ and 100 pounds– but she seemed to have a colorful personality, doing most of the talking and leaving her nonsmoking friends laughing.  I only got to see two drags from an awkward location before she dropped the cigarette to the ground and crushed it out.  I wanted to ID that butt but she wasn’t going anywhere.  Thankfully she cooperated by revealing her left hand holding a pack of Newports.  Wish I could have gotten more from this one but she was still probably my third best find of the night.  And not far away from this group was another group of three 18ish girls, all relatively mediocre looks-wise but all smoking, helping me boost my numbers for the night up.  Petite blondie wandered their direction and started chatting them up as well, still proudly brandishing that pack of Newports.

The midway shut down at about 11:15 Tuesday night, 45 minutes before it’s usual midnight closing.  This was a bad development for a number of reasons.  It reduced the already limited amount of territory for me to navigate on this grounds and it shrunk the fairgrounds population pretty significantly in what is almost always the heaviest smoking hour of the night.  This would lead me to leave about 20 minutes sooner than usual but not before scoring a couple more memorable sightings.  The first came in this dark seating area next to the pizza stand where a group of four 21ish girls were sitting.  One of them was smoking a freshly lit cigarette while the others were eating pizza.  From what I could see she was attractive, but the combination of darkness and her black sweatshirt and long sepia hair camouflaged her a bit.  A group of guys approached, a couple wielding cigarettes, and I took the distraction as the opportunity to walk past her.  I still didn’t get a great look, but confirmed she was decently attractive and a pretty impressive smoker as well judging from the long drags and exhales I saw in silhouette.

From there it was time to go and as I approached the north exit en route to my grandma’s garage to retrieve my car, I got the confirmation of a suspicion from earlier regarding the aforementioned “blog favorite”.  The girl in question was 2012’s mid-teen “Selena Gomez” lookalike discovery who I saw again in 2013 putting on a more mature smoking performance.  I had seen a girl I figured might be her earlier in the evening, but despite her memorably cute face, trademark short jean shorts, and long legs, couldn’t tell for sure because something was off.  It was her hair.  Regrettably, her hair is now some alternative Miley Cyrus-style abomination shaved on one side with a fluff of hair on top hanging over the other side.  At least she didn’t go with a bleach blond as Miley did and kept her original trademark brunette.  Anyway, the reason I knew for sure it was her this time was because….she was smoking a cork-filter cigarette, assuredly one of her infamous Newports.  She was the only smoker in her group of six or so in fact.  There was absolutely no hope of me successfully watching her smoke at this uber-isolated part of the fairgrounds without getting caught 20 times over, so I just kept walking occasionally looking over my shoulder and catching one drag that was impressive like those I saw from her this year.  Still, why oh why do adorable young smoker girls have to grow up?  While her unattractive hairdo certainly doesn’t discredit her lengthy body of work over the previous two years, it’s hard for me to imagine she’ll make 2014’s year-end favorites list as she did in 2012 and 2013 because I just can’t get past the goofy haircut.

On that mellow closing note, I walked to my car, sicker than ever as the gyro I ate was hanging with me like a block of cement in my gut.  As I was pulling out of my grandma’s garage and preparing to pull onto the street to go home, I spotted a familiar smoker walking home herself…..the girl next to the pizza stand about 15 minutes earlier.  Unfortunately it was still too dark to see her face as she walked home with two of the guys who approached her earlier, but it wasn’t too dark to see that she was smoking again.  Overall, a very good night.  A Tuesday night sighting haul of 28 is rock solid and I know I already have one sighting assured of being in my year-end top-25 fairgrounds sightings.  Hopefully the momentum will carry on into Wednesday….and hopefully I feel less like a dead man walking when I go.



Wednesday Night

I’m unhappy to report that I went into night two of my local county fair still feeling sick, barely eating anything all day as upset as my stomach was.  My fever had lifted some but not entirely and the entire fair experience continues to suffer because of it.  On the other hand, if the smoker girls continue to deliver the way they did for a second night in a row on Wednesday night, going to the fair feeling less than 100% is a small sacrifice.  As depressed as I often get about the state of affairs with smoking these days, especially among younger girls, visiting my small-town home county fair in southern Minnesota successfully lifts my spirits year after year.  I didn’t get an individual sighting as exceptional as my best one from Tuesday night, but I got a flurry of “extra base hit” sightings, sticking with the baseball metaphor that I find to be a useful metric.  The total sightings number was 23, but with a number of repeat offenders.  And while I didn’t get in “trouble” the way I did three years ago when I got cornered by the cops, I did get another gentle reminder of my very obvious exposure level on this small fairgrounds.

I arrived at the fairgrounds around 6:45, giving me a small window of about 45 minutes before Corey was supposed to meet up with me for the concert.  Considering how scarce sightings tend to be at this fair at this time of the night, I was fine with that.  But I had only been there about 10 minutes before stumbling into my cousin and her husband who I frequently see at the fair.  And I talked to them about 10 seconds before I heard my phone going off, even though it wasn’t yet 6:00.  It was Corey….who saw me walking by while he was eating and decided to call to meet up early.  Thanks buddy!  This development assured me of zero sightings before the concert of country singer Craig Campbell.  I sat down with Corey and chatted while he finished eating fair food, and he then wanted to venture way into the fairgrounds parking lot to get something out of his truck.  This held some potential of seeing girls sneaking a smoke in the parking lot but nothing happened.  We ventured back in and took seating in my favorite spot for the concert.

The smoking area and beer gardens were relatively sparse again and I wasn’t confident I’d get much in the way of sightings here again this evening, but I ended up doing okay.  The first “sighting” of relevance was one of two heartbreakers that I’ll count as a sighting even though I didn’t see actual smoking.  These two girls who looked about 18 had been lurking in the smoking area for much of the concert, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they were gonna smoke as, like many others who lurk in this area, they were chatting it up with older adults on the other side of the fence inside the beer gardens.  I still held out hope though as both girls brought some IT factor to the table, with the prettiest of the two being a long-haired blond wearing a denim jacket and a summery flower print dress while the other girl, a long-haired light brunette, was wearing a pink top and very tight dark jeans.  I got my hopes up most when a trio of older smokers, one of whom didn’t look old enough to be either of the girls’ parents and the other two who looked too old to be their parents, approached the fence to chat it up with them.  The girls conversed with the older people who they clearly knew, but after about five minutes, the oldest guy of the three who looked like he was about 60, appeared to be beckoning something from the pretty blond in the dress.  Sure enough, she opened her purse and pulled out a pack of Newports, extracting a cigarette for the guy.  So this was gonna be a perfect opportunity for her to have a cigarette for herself right?  Wrong!  In fact, the two of them lurked in the area at least another 15 minutes and she never did smoke.  As I’ve said before, if I have every reason to believe based on anecdotal evidence (such as possession) that the girl smokes, I’ll count her as a sighting, but this is clearly one with an asterisk next to it.  I had hoped to see her later on the grounds actually smoking as I so often do at this fair, but it didn’t happen this time.

In fact, it wouldn’t be until the last 15 minutes or so of the concert before I finally hit pay dirt, and boy did I ever, with one of the most confusing sightings I’ve ever gotten.  This sighting had all the bells and whistles to be worthy of year-end greatest-hits acclaim, but I’m not sure here because the ambiguity was maddening.  This cute and petite little blond in a tanktop and jean shorts wandered out of the grandstand and lurked in the smoking area.  She looked about 13 so I figured she was just waiting for somebody or preparing to send a text.  Imagine my utter disbelief when about five seconds later an unlit cigarette was inserted into her lips and sparked up.  I continued to be skeptical though as her back was now towards me and I figured I must have just missed her face.  She had to have simply been an older girl who looked really young, but she cooperated nicely and took a seat on a bench in the smoking area, sitting in the light and letting me have as good of a look at her face as I could possibly get.  And sweet Jesus I could still swear she was not a day over 14.  But that’s when the confusion started.  Two much older guys followed her onto the bench and it was clear they were part of the same group.  I didn’t get a good look at the guy who sat across from her with his back to me, but figured he was in his 30s.  But the guy who sat next to her was this bearded, thuggish-looking young guy who looked about 22.  All three of them were smoking cigarettes and I was carefully studying this odd dynamic for clues as to their association with one another…..

What I got were a contrasting litany of clues that continue to leave me scratching my head the next day as I write this.  The girl carried herself like a very new smoker, everything from the way she held her cigarette to her extremely shallow one-second drags and minimalist exhales.  And adorably, she had a jug of Gatorade in front of her that she was taking sips from in between shallow drags on her cigarette.  Everything about her smoking style screamed that she was exactly what she originally seemed, an early teen girl who just picked up the smoking habit.  But right when I thought I had this situation figured out and was leaning back to enjoy a rare show of an adorable beginner early teen smoker, the thuggish bearded guy leaned over to give the girl a quick peck on the lips.  I had dismissed the prospect of this guy being her boyfriend because he looked at least eight years older than she did, but the evidence was now pointing to him being just that.  Was she considerably older than she looked?  I just kept looking at that tender face right in front of me and simply couldn’t see it.  There was just no way she was older than 14!  But I couldn’t imagine this guy being any less than 21 and would be pretty shocked if he was carrying out a public relationship with a girl as young as this girl seemed given the obvious legal implications….

I never quit trying to figure this sighting out but it only got more confusing.  After several minutes she crushed the cigarette out on the edge of the bench she was sitting on and dropped it to the grass.  Show over right?  Not by a longshot.  I wasn’t paying as close of attention in the moments after she finished her cigarette but lo and behold when I looked over again she was already smoking another one, her smoking style continuing to consist of the shallowest imaginable drags and exhales.  The presumed boyfriend smoked another as well, and also pulled in for another quickie kiss.  But things just got insane after she finished the second cigarette and she reached to the pack of L & M and lighter in front of her to fire up a THIRD cigarette.  Even with all the ambiguity about the girl’s age, I had still grown comfortable with the idea that she was a rookie smoker based on her rudimentary style, but now even that was in question.  After all, how many rookie smokers smoke three cigarettes in a row over a 15-minute period.  The confusion was killing me, but it was a good kind of killing to be sure.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the fence inside the beer gardens, two attractive 20-something blonds were lighting up cigarettes of their own.  They were both hot but stealing the show was the long-haired blond with pink top and skimpy black cutoffs.  It was darker on the other side of the fence so I didn’t get as excellent of a vantage point as I did with the would-be 14-year-old cutie in the smoking area, but I was able to see that the girls were both hot and much more skilled smokers than the teenager with long, deep drags and cloudy exhales.  It was not uncommon for me to be able to dart my eyes from the young girl outside the fence to the two 20-somethings inside the fence and see three consecutive drags, the cherries of their cigarettes glowing red one after another with a cloud of smoke spewed from their respiratory systems that were as black as the evening sky.  It was far and away the highlight thus far of the smoking area from the two nights of concerts.

And the show ended right around the same time as well as the two 20-somethings wrapped up their cigarettes around the same time and crushed them out while the younger girl who had by now smoked as many cigarettes combined as the two older guys in her company finished her third cigarette soon after.  The concert was wrapping up and the trio got up to leave moments before Corey and I would depart, giving me one last look at this girl’s body which, again, looked like that of an early teen girl.  So what was the most likely scenario here?  Perhaps it was exactly as it seemed and a much older guy was dating this jailbait girl and corrupting her into being a smoker.  But honestly I suspect he may have been a few years younger than I suspected and she may have been a few years older.  You’ll occasionally run into girls, especially really petite girls, who look much younger than they are, but damn if this girl didn’t look like she was just getting ready to start the eighth grade next month.  I didn’t see her on the grounds again Wednesday night but have three more nights in which to do so and am hoping I can possibly get more context to understand her story.  Even with the confusion, I’d still rate this as my second best sighting of the night.

Corey again cooperated beautifully and left immediately after the concert.  He works early in the morning but only on weekdays so there’s still no guarantee he’ll be taking off right after the concert on Friday and Saturday nights.  Whatever the case, it was not yet 10 and I had full fetish freedom for the next couple of hours.  Unfortunately, my timing was off for the next one, the second of the heartbreaking would-be sightings of the night.  I had just walked over to the grandstand’s south side entrance to see if there were any smokers leaving the concert on that end of the fairgrounds.  I then returned to the north side entrance where I had just emerged from and out of the corner of my eye caught two blond hotties hustling through the grass en route to the main bathroom complex.  The girl that dominated my attention was this 19-20ish long-haired dark blond in black blouse with a pattern on it and pair of gorgeously fitting acid-washed light blue jean shorts.  The main reason she dominated my attention, however, is that she was holding a pack of Marlboro Lights in her hand.  I followed her and the friend to the bathroom and they went inside.  I sat on the bench outside the bathroom awaiting their exit with the hope that cigarettes would be fired up then.  But when they exited the bathroom the cigarettes apparently retreated into the one girl’s purse.  The smoking most likely occurred before I arrived on the scene and I probably just missed it….

Still, looking at these girls they had a certain badass look about them, with very mature faces that made me suspect they may have been a little older than I first expected, but soon after stepping away from the bathroom, they took note of a couple of high school girls hovering and they greeted one another in a way that suggested they were of the same general age group, reaffirming my original suspicion that the girls were under 21.  They were progressing to the remote north side of the grounds and I followed with the hope that they may get around to smoking again.  Instead they wandered into one of the horse buildings and I couldn’t follow without looking too familiar to them.  Even without seeing smoking though, it was a huge treat to watch the one girl’s ass in those tight jean shorts and knowing that the owner of this spectacular body was a cigarette smoker.  My plan was to try to keep tabs on this duo as I expected more from them, but every attempt I made to return to the remote part of the grounds where they had migrated was met with distractions of the good kind, so I wouldn’t see them again.  A minor disappointment, but there were plenty of other shiny objects in the coming two hours that made up for it.

The next shiny object in question would end up being my favorite sighting of the night.  I was walking past the edge of the midway when I spotted a guy and an adorable ponytailed blond cutie who looked about 18 or 19 standing in front of a food stand.  The girl had a freshly lit cigarette in her hand.  She was probably the purest and most distinguished beauty of the night with a face that was in one sense quite wholesome, but in another sense, she also didn’t look out of place in possession of her cigarette.  She was wearing a black sweatshirt (this is Minnesota and after dark it gets cool even in July) along with a skimpy pair of medium blue jean shorts that shaped her ass gorgeously and showed off her slender, perfect legs beneath them.  I hovered in the general area hoping to see something that impressed but nothing prepared me for the show I was about to get, which began with the appetizer of a long, deep drag followed by a monstrously cloudy exhale.  Then the sighting took on another player as another blond of the same age who was apparently in the company of this couple emerged from the food stand, and she was wielding a cigarette too.  Now this girl was definitely chubbier than I’d prefer but very pretty, and decked out in a conservative plaid blouse and jeans.  And as I was acclimating myself to her added presence to the sighting, the unlikely main event of this sighting came next as the original girl was stepping up to the front of the food stand and quickly walked away carrying a gigantic bag of cotton candy!  The trio then began to walk into the midway and I giddily followed….

I had already gotten some of anecdotal evidence that the ponytailed blond was something special but I was about to get some more as I watched the cigarette go into her mouth and could have sworn I saw both of her hands free while she did (remember I was following from the rear), and the exhale that followed flowed out of her mouth and must have caught the slightest breeze as it then flowed right back to her face and the smoked rolled past her cheeks and drifted my direction.  Much as I enjoyed seeing her gorgeous ass from the rear, I needed to position myself parallel to her to see this smoking style a little more directly.  When I did, she confirmed that I had seen what I thought I had from the rear….a lengthy no-handlebars dangling drag.  The cigarette was placed in the right corner of her mouth and remained perfectly straight as she puckered her lips around the filter and took a long, deep drag, followed by a thundercloud exhale.  The chubby friend was a decent smoker too, but she was definitely playing second fiddle to the main event here.  But it was then that my favorite girl started opening that bag of cotton candy.  Now smoking-while-eating sightings have always been near the top of my list of triggers, but I don’t think I ever anticipated I’d stumble upon a smoking-while-eating sighting that included cotton candy.  I really can’t imagine the two tastes blending together well!  But apparently the tastes suited each other just fine to my adorable blond as she proceeded to alternate between stuffing her palate with a giant glob of cotton candy and a deep, intense drag from her cork filter cigarette, almost always in the form of her very distinctive no-handlebars dangling drags where the erect cigarette extended from the right corner of her mouth for a good five seconds.

The trio of friends eventually migrated to the back of the midway and settled in a larger group of mutual acquaintances made up mostly of guys, several of them who were smoking.  This was a doubled-edged sword as I was able to find a bench with a great vantage point of the group, but I also knew that my chances of a butt identification would be very long now that there were so many smokers hovered in this one area and not likely to go anywhere for awhile even after finishing their cigarettes.  But I had about three more minutes of enjoying my front-row seat of the show, occasionally catching glimpses of the chubby blond friend but mostly focusing my attention on this beautiful baby-faced blond doing one after another dangling drags in between eating big chunks of cotton candy.  At one point she even stuffed her mouth with cotton candy before the exhale from her last cigarette drag exited her mouth.  This girl was clearly very well-practiced as a smoker and the contrast between her extreme style and her girly girl face was getting a big old rise out of this boy’s pants.  She dropped the cigarette to the ground and I could see again that it was a cork filter but as expected, the crowd of smokers hovered there and I simply couldn’t wait them out for a butt ID.  I grudgingly got up to leave but it wouldn’t be the last I’d see of this girl or her friend.  In fact, I saw the chubby friend two more times within the hour, smoking both times.  But despite her chubbiness, the girl was pretty enough and a solid enough of a smoker that I would unequivocally bed her down if given the chance.

Now remember, at this point I was still hoping to catch those girls again from the horse barn, one of whom was carrying the pack of Marlboro Lights and who I likely just missed a smoking show from, so I was planning to head that direction again just in case, but on the front side of the midway I’d get another distraction from another 18ish smoker girl, this one a curly haired brunette in a gray top and tight pale blue jeans covering her slender female figure.  She was walking next to a nonsmoking guy I figured was a boyfriend and they approached a group of benches and a whole slate of fellow teenagers they apparently knew.  The girl’s cigarette was already about 80% gone but she somehow made it last several more drags while visiting with her mixed-gender friends, none of whom were smoking at the time.  But after she finished the cigarette and dropped it to the pavement in an inaccessible spot given the situation, she migrated to another bench where she opened her purse, extracted a pack of Newports, and handed a cigarette to an unattractive black girl who was apparently a friend.  This gave me the brand ID I was hoping for so I figured I had gotten everything I was gonna get out of this sighting.  As an aside, there was this very old man (well into his 70s) who sat on these same benches smoking several times last night.  I figured he worked in one of the carnival stands nearby.  He was quiet and kept to himself except for one incident where he saw a couple preteen boys climb onto one of the tables and he shouted out “get off the tables” in a surprisingly curmudgeonly tone.  Keep this guy in mind because he comes to play in a future sighting at the end of the evening.

Again attempting to make my way to the horse barn area on the north side, I was again sidetracked in the best possible way.  A group of five 17-ish kids, three guys and two girls, was walking my direction.  Right away, I noticed the cute and slender short-haired brunette in a white top and pale jeans had a freshly lit cigarette between her fingers.  As soon as I passed her, I turned around to follow, once again failing to reach the horse barn.  As I turned I discovered there was another cigarette possessor amongst this crowd…and it happened to be the other girl.  I had yet to see her face but her profile was such that she instantly became my primary person of interest in this group.  My mouth must have been hanging open admiring her red hair hanging over the shoulders of her white tanktop with a delicious pair of shorts framing her spectacularly curvy ass, the shorts having a black background with a pink and red flower pattern over it, and all with the freshly lit cigarette held between her fingers only inches away from those shorts.  Two cops were walking towards them and as they passed the group, one of the cops looked to the other and said matter-of-factly “smoking” as if speculating whether they were underage or not but thankfully not hassling them.  It must have been enough of a warning sign for the group though as they migrated towards the back of a mini-donut stand about 50 yards to the south to continue with their cigarettes, and where at least two of the guys lit up as well, which was mildly disappointing as I would have preferred the girls being the only smokers in the group.  I was able to find a nearby bench to watch a fair amount of the remaining show and finally got a good look at the redhead’s face.  She wasn’t a perfect 10 beauty but she had a girl-next-door accessibility about her that was very attractive and I definitely wouldn’t have guessed she was a smoker, unlike the brunette who looked more like a smoker.  Both girls were decent smokers, both neither had any definitive stylistic flourishes.

The group didn’t stick around behind the mini-donut stand long though and progressed across the street towards the midway.  I followed hoping for a butt ID but knew I was in trouble when they stopped and started talking amongst each other in a huddle.  I took a nearby bench and watched as both girls took final drags from their cigarettes.  The redhead crushed hers out beneath her feet and I tried to mark the spot for when they left, but unfortunately the other smokers in the group were littering their own cigarettes in the same general area.  When they departed a couple of minutes later I approached the spot and found a flurry of butts, none of which I could identify with certainty.  I suspected the redhead’s was the all-white Marlboro Light Special Blend butt though.

At most seven minutes passed and I was walking through a different part of the fairgrounds.  I looked to the west and couldn’t believe my eyes when this same mixed-gender group of 17-year-olds was smoking again, or at least both of the girls were.  My intent was to follow them again to assure myself of getting a butt ID, but I was briefly sidetracked walking by the BINGO stand and seeing a long-haired brunette sitting on the outer bench of the BINGO pavilion with a cigarette in hand.  She looked attractive from the back and I just had to get a look at her face.  She was prettier and more wholesome even than I expected, apparently a young mother whose young son who looked about two was sitting next to her and the nonsmoking Hispanic guy I presumed was her husband/boyfriend.  I had to just stand there lurking and really drew attention to myself doing so, but I wanted to catch at least one drag from her before parting.  And she didn’t disappoint either, taking a nice long drag and then turning her head to exhale as politely as possible amidst all the BINGO players, most of them nonsmokers.  Much as I would have loved to stick around for more, I was way too wide-open standing just outside the pavilion watching this…and I wanted to see if I could catch up to my favorite new stinky redhead anyway.

I was skeptical whether I would because I didn’t see what direction her group was going but in a minute or so I spotted them, heading back north presumably to the parking lot to leave.  I tried to keep some distance since at least some people in this group would certainly have noticed my presence at various points in the last several minutes, but I really wanted a butt ID.  They migrated into ever-darker areas of the grounds, which meant the best I could get in terms of smoking observations was seeing their cherries glow as they dragged at just the right angle or catch their plumes of exhaled exhaust.  As expected, they turned left once they got to the north end of the grounds, heading for the parking lot.  I watched from a distance and swore that I saw my redheaded stranger toss her butt into the gravel as she walked.  I drifted that direction thinking it would be a piece of cake to find the still-smoldering cigarette and confirm her butt, but unfortunately I just couldn’t find a smoldering butt in the dark.  Perhaps she didn’t toss the cigarette as I expected and I simply mistook a random hand gesture she was making to her group as tossing a butt.  Whatever the case, I did see two Marlboro Light Special Blend butts while observing the area where I thought she tossed the butt, which may well have been hers and would be in keeping with the butt I thought was hers from the midway earlier.

And in keeping with the theme of the night, as I was surveying the landscape for the previous girl’s discarded cigarette butt, I looked up to discover another foursome of guys and girls that included another emphysema beauty.  The light brunette with shoulder-length hair, a bare-midriff top, and white shorts was the only smoker in the group–which I couldn’t see too closely given the darkness–and I was a little disappointed as the dark blond in pink shorts next to her looked like a knockout from afar.  The group was walking my direction and were apparently drifting to a bathroom structure way out in the boonies that I didn’t even know existed.  It was apparently only the guys who needed to use the facilities (there’s a switch!) as the two girls took a bench in a pretty isolated area where I sat down to observe.  While it was still too dark to get a good look at either girl, I did finally get to see a few drags from the brunette and she was very impressive.  Even the way she held her cigarette with her elbow propped up on the bench got me all excited, before she even got around to taking one of her deep drags that lit up the cherry of her cigarette a very bright red for several seconds before she released a massively giant plume of exhaust.  It was killing me not being able to get a good look at her face, but seeing those three very impressive drags made up for it.  The guys came out of the bathroom and the foursome then proceeded back into the main stretches of the fairgrounds.  I followed the group back in from a distance and finally noticed that my brunette had a pretty big caboose in those white shorts.  As I studied it though, it seemed more like because she was hippy rather than overweight.  Anyway, I was fortunate enough to see her last drag from behind and watch her deposit the butt onto the gravel.  This time I was able to walk up from behind and locate the still-smoldering all-white butt she just discarded.  It was a Camel Crush.

I pressed forward into the grounds because I had to see this girl’s face (and the hot blond friend in pink shorts) in a spot well lit enough to appreciate her features.  They approached the midway and I got my chance.  The blond friend was definitely attractive and her presentation was a little stronger in those tight pink shorts, but the light brunette was prettier.  I had been hoping for a wholesome face but was floored at just how wholesome she was.  Looking at that adorable face, it was really hard to reconcile that this girl is not only an addicted cigarette smoker, but one with the ferocious technique that she did.  While the plump midsection was definitely a blemish, it further defined her and separated her from the pack…and wouldn’t stop me for a moment in exchanging bodily fluids with her.  Both girls and the guys looked 18 or 19.

I hovered in the general area of this group for awhile as they migrated just inside the carnival and at one point noticed there was a gorgeous 18-ish blond in a light blue blouse and short white shorts lingering with them and brandishing a freshly lit cigarette.  I just had to get a closer look at this!  But when I got to a decent vantage point, the cigarette was no longer in her hand.  What happened?  Some shrimpy black kid who looked about 14 was standing next to her and held a cigarette of his own, and he presumably let her have a drag of his.  D’oh!  And the girl was an absolute knockout to boot, frustrating me that I missed however brief of a show as it was.  I’ll kill the suspense right now, however, and let you know we haven’t seen the last of this girl.

Along that same line, I repeatedly saw this duo of mid-20s brunette gals and on one occasion, the unattractive and overweight girl of the duo was smoking a cigarette.  Unfortunately, the knockout long-haired brunette beauty next to her was not.  Every time I saw this girl who was just the perfect height and weight to pull of her ensemble of a red blouse and skimpy jean shorts, I swooned at how gorgeous of a smoker she’d be.  And once again, I suspect you know I’m not bringing this up without additional revelations to come.

Now I alluded at the beginning of the Wednesday writeup that I had an awkward “wake-up call” encounter, and it took place in the midway.  I was pacing through the midway and this middle-aged woman from inside a carnival stand called me out….

“I’ve seen you walking through here like five times.  What are you up to?” she asked in a not-as-suspicious-as-it-sounds tone.

I said that I was just taking in the fair and she responded that she didn’t know how I was able to take anything in as fast as I walked through the grounds.  Yikes!  Pretty bad when even the carnies know I’m up to no good!  Apparently I am THAT obvious at this small fair.  And by the way, the carny gal was smoking but not among my preferred demographic to count as a sighting.  I proceeded to talk to her for a few minutes and disarm whatever suspicions she may have had about my lingering presence.  The midway would be closing soon anyway so she wouldn’t see me again, but if I stand out like a sore thumb this badly on night two of a five-night fair, it makes me nervous that I may have more choppy waters ahead.

But the carny gal turned out to be my guardian angel as she allowed me to time my departure from the midway to coincide with the departure of my favorite cotton candy blond of the night and her chubby friend.  They migrated into a huddle of friends on the main street of the grounds and had just lit up another round of cigarettes.  This was the FOURTH cigarette I had seen from the chubby blond in the last hour or so and the second from the cotton candy beauty.  Positioning was terrible for this one as all I could do was lurk from a standing posture and do so for a couple of drags.  But as expected, the drags didn’t disappoint as this striking beauty defied her feminine image again by placing that cork filter cigarette in the far right corner of her mouth and carry out a dangling drag with the cigarette in a straight-line of erection the entire time.  Even after decades of fetishing, I don’t recall seeing a smoking style quite like this before, and I was reminded again why I fell in love with this girl an hour earlier.  But as I said, my positioning was terrible and I had to take a quarter loop elsewhere and return to minimize my exposure.  Sadly, when I got back less than a minute later, the two smoker girls were gone, not to be seen again last night.  I was kicking myself as I really wanted a butt ID and had I not departed for that single minute I could have probably followed them out of the fairgrounds and spotted her butt when she discarded.  Still, cotton candy blond and her chubby friend managed to reinforce their status as the most impressive smoker duo among a crowded field Wednesday evening.

I perused past the beer gardens next and hit the jackpot once again with an aforementioned favorite….the mid-20s dark brunette with the red blouse and tight jean shorts.  And this time she had a cigarette!  She was seated on the bench with the overweight friend (also smoking) and another nonsmoking friend.  Since I had seen this girl a few times that night and this was the first I saw her smoking, I figured she might be a social smoker, but judging from the intensity of her drags the cloudiness of her exhales, that began to seem unlikely.  I was giddy as I admired this beauty’s perfect face and had now confirmed she was a smoker with serious style.  Unfortunately, the best vantage point I had of her face was from an awkward standing position that I couldn’t keep up, and I had to sit on a bench on the other side of her with a mostly rear-side view.  Even this was fantastic as her body was so perfectly proportioned, her jean shorts fitting so nicely and her creamy smooth legs glistening with the minimal light exposure.  Plus she propped her elbow on the bench and held her cigarette as if sitting at a barstool, creating a nice throwback to the good old days when women still smoked indoors.  After observing several beautiful drags and all-mouth exhales, she very abruptly flung her smoldering butt underneath the table, which of course would make for easy butt identification when they left.  Unfortunately, they stuck around….and stuck around….and stuck around….without additional smoking to make their continued presence worthwhile.  FINALLY, about 45 minutes after I spotted them, the two brunette gals were getting up to leave.  I made a point of IDing her disposed butt–a Camel Menthol–and then following them towards the parking lot in hopes of seeing more cigarettes smoked.  Unfortunately, only the fat girl was smoking, confirming that my favorite girl is not a particularly heavy smoker.  Heavy smoker or not, her style, beauty, and perfect feminine form was more than enough to make her an extra base hit.

And during my many laps around the block waiting to ID the previous girl’s butt, I scored another unlikely 17ish blond cutie duo wielding cigarettes.  The one girl was an overweight plain jane but the other was an innocent-looking sweetheart of a teen in a silver tanktop and nicely fitting jean shorts.  On a lesser night, seeing a girl like this in possession of a cigarette may well have been the highlight of the evening as adorable as she was.  A third nonsmoking member of the group went into the bathroom, leaving the two smokers to sit on a bench.  I stood across from them hoping to see a few drags, but unfortunately everything that possibly could go wrong did.  I got a few moments to admire the girls wonderful curves caressed by her tanktop and jean shorts, taking particular admiration in the curvature of her vagina.  But before I saw a drag, a flurry of friends from elsewhere swooped in and surrounded them, with one guy sitting on the girl’s lap (lucky bastard).  I occasionally caught flashes of the cigarette still held in her hand but if a drag was ever taken I didn’t see it.  The dynamic here was too maddening and I was too exposed where I stood to make it a wise choice for me to linger.  I only saw the tail end of one drag from this girl but I guess this is just one of those cases where knowing the girl smokes will be the victory I walk away with from this sighting.

The local county fair had one more treat for me in the final moments before I left, a girl who I got the briefest of appetizers from about 45 minutes earlier.  It was the hot blond in the blue blouse and skimpy white shorts who was briefly in possession of a cigarette but apparently relinquished it to a shrimpy black male.  Only now she was standing amidst a crowd of males her age (right around 18) and had a freshly lit cigarette all her own between her fingers.  The good news is that she was positioned in between two food stands in the center of the grounds and there was an open bench I was able to sit and get a pretty good look.  The bad news is she kept drifting in and out of my line of vision, either getting obstructed by one of the guys or walking off in front of one of the stands where I couldn’t see her.  The even worse news is that she was an agonizingly slow smoker, going an eternity between drags.  But amidst all this waiting I was still able to have my heart positively broken admiring her wholesome blond beauty (it would be hard to construct a more perfect Midwestern girl) in those snug white shorts showing off so much beautiful leg.  I finally got to see one drag–sort of–but I caught most of a hugely cloudy exhale positioned skyward.  I had assumed this girl was probably a social smoker up to that point, but was starting to question that now.  And further developments on the sighting would cause me to question my first impression even more…..

Now remember when I mentioned the old man smoker who I thought worked one of the food stands?   He was hovering near those food stands with an unlit cigarette in his mouth and happened to make eye contact with my gorgeous blond smoker.  Blondie warmly said to him “Good night.  We’ll see you tomorrow!” as if she knew him.  Maybe she did, but either way it was adorable to have this delicate flower of a smoker girl communicating with another smoker old enough to be her grandfather.  After the old timer faded from the scene, it was more of a mangled mess with excrutiatingly long wait times between drags, but a blond guy that may or may not have been her boyfriend who was also smoking a cigarette put his arm around her shoulder, the two of them standing there with cigarettes protruding from their fingers.  Honestly, my hands would instead have been all over her ass in those white shorts, but hey, that’s me.  Anyway, I kept waiting for a drag to transpire but it just never did…and then the girl walked in front of one of the food stands and drove me absolutely nuts as all I could see was the cigarette held between her fingers while she was there.  I did get something else fascinating though….the name.  The same blond guy who had his arm around here was talking some kind of jive amidst the group and then shouted her direction, “Isn’t that right Sarah?!?!”  Since the blond beauty was the only girl around, “Sarah” had to be my favorite cigarette-wielding hottie.  And the same guy quickly afterwards talked to another guy in the group who had lit up and asked “So you’re smoking cigs now too?” indicating to me this whole group was more than mere social smokers….

But it became clear I wasn’t gonna get to see anything else from my vantage point on the bench and I also had no realistic chance of getting a butt ID amidst this giant crowd, so I decided my parting shot would be to linger in a standing posture parallel to the food stand she was standing in front of in hopes of catching one more drag.  Good choice.  Only seconds after I arrived, I finally got my first direct view of this babe smoking…and she delivered in spades.  She took a nice rich drag, puckering her lips around that all while filter and ingesting the poisons into her perfect body before tilting her head skyward and releasing a spectacularly cloudy exhale.  This girl was the real deal without question.  Much as I wished I could linger, I just couldn’t and the best I could do was walk directly past her en route to the exit hoping she reeked of smoke, but I didn’t really get an identifiable odor off of her and simply called it a successful night on the almost completely emptied-out fairgrounds en route to my car.

And what a night it was.  In terms of comprehensive awesomeness, I think Wednesday exceeded Tuesday.  I always seem to get tremendous bang for my buck at my local county fair and don’t know anyplace else where I can score a mere 23 sightings in an evening where so many of them are this spectacular.  Three more nights to go and I stand at 51 total sightings.  That puts me on track to get in the 110-125 sightings over the course of the five nights that is my recent average.  My record of 144 sightings from 2010 is most likely a fluke related to a delayed Saturday night Hinder concert that sent every young female in the audience out to the smoking area for a nicotine fix while waiting.  And hopefully I can avoid getting in more trouble for my stalking on these familiar grounds.  That’s my biggest fear with three nights to go.



Thursday Night

In 2011 and 2012, Thursday night was easily the best sightings night of the week at my county fair.  In 2013, it was the weakest night of the five.  I had decent hopes that this year’s Thursday night would be a successful one as country singer Thomas Rhett, a hot commodity among the preferred fetish demographic, was performing in the grandstand.  But unfortunately last night ended up closer to 2013 in terms of sightings success than 2011 and 2012, although that’s not entirely fair as I had a few repeaters with nice second acts and I got reconciliation on one of the previous night’s misses.  All in all, I scored 20 sightings of new girls along with the aforementioned returning favorites.

The night started right about 6:20 when I entered the gates.  I haven’t mentioned them yet this year but the girls at the gate taking admission and punching season tickets are as hot as ever, mostly blond and nearly all wearing short jean shorts with smooth, freshly shaven legs stemming out of them.  I haven’t been lucky enough to get my flirty favorite yet this year though.  Anyway, I proceeded into the gates with my usual low expectations of great sightings before the show.  It’s unfortunate that in recent years, sightings before the concerts have become incredibly scarce, which really sucks for me because the only time I dare to snap cell phone pics is during the daylight hours (don’t want to risk a flash going off by taking a photo at night).  Indeed I went nearly a full hour navigating through the crowded grounds before I got my first mediocre sighting.

They were letting the line of people in to take their seat for the grandstand show shortly after 7 and I always like to check the outside areas since a lot of smokers will step out for a puff after having secured their seat.  I thought I really hit pay dirt on first glance last night as I approached the south side grandstand entrance and saw a fat middle-aged gal standing next to a very slender blond in a tanktop and white shorts, both smoking.  From afar I suspected it was a mother-daughter sighting, but my guess is it was just two smokers shooting the breeze while blackening their lungs.  And on closer inspection, the slender blond looked a little trashy….certainly good enough to count as a sighting but someone I lost interest in quickly.  She was probably mid-20s and I would see her smoking again in the evening after the show.

Things came alive for the next sighting though, easily my best sighting all week from before sunset.  It was about 7:40 and I had already seen Corey a few times on the grounds, but luckily he was talking to his parents and didn’t see me but I knew I was living on borrowed time until he called to meet me for the concert.  But one place where I figured he’d be easy to avoid was the midway so I started heading that direction, but wouldn’t get far before I’d come across a foursome of 18-ish girls walking the other direction, two of whom were smoking.  One of the four was the least attractive of the group, a curly haired brunette who was good enough for my sightings count but who became elevator music instantly thereafter because the other girl who was smoking was a stunner, a long-haired blond in a white tanktop and tight dark jeans.  She had a real classic look about her and stood out as easily the prettiest of the four girls in the group.  I was salivating at the prospect of snapping a couple of pics in motion and managed a few….nothing exceptional by any stretch but at least one head shot that will preserve this girl’s beautiful image for eternity.  And I also got to admire her smoking show.  There were no stylistic bells and whistles but I will absolutely never get tired with seeing a cute teenage girl walk through a crowded fairgrounds during daytime hours shamelessly smoking a cigarette and exhaling into the crowd.  And with each year that smoking becomes more culturally vilified I find that much more irresistible.  The sighting took on a new player as the group of girls stumbled into an 18-19ish guy and, sure enough, it appeared to be the boyfriend of my favorite blond smoker who put her arms (cigarette hand included) around his waist and gave him an affectionate semi-hug that forced him to choke on her smoky stench.  The group stayed in place for a bit and I hovered, hoping to still score a butt ID.  But just as the group starting moving again, my phone went off…..

Unsurprisingly it was Corey.  Wonderful timing, buddy!  Interestingly though, I was able to field the call from Corey and follow my smoker girl without appearing to be stalking her since I was immersed in the phone conversation.  Corey said he was “in front of the goat barn” which was the same general direction these girls were headed (and me by proxy) so he could easily have sabotaged my chances here.  Thankfully, he said he was gonna be later than usual getting into the grandstand and would probably meet me up there around 8:15.  I agreed to those terms and felt as though I probably dodged a bullet as the conversation ended with just a couple of drags left on my blond hottie’s cigarette.  Oh how nice it was to see a cigarette approach those sweet young lips followed by the cloudy exhale into the crowded fairgrounds.  She cooperated nicely by dropping the cigarette to the pavement without crushing it out and it took me about five yards of walking to be right on top of the Camel Menthol she just finished.  I was now satisfied with my pre-concert haul and was gonna prepare to go into the grandstand show.

The grandstand show didn’t yield much in the way of sightings either in the smoking area I overlooked from my seat or in the beer gardens on the other side of the fence but I did manage to keep alive the long-standing county fair tradition of getting a pregnant smoker sighting.  It was a late 20s brunette in a conservative black top and slacks who was easily eight months pregnant in the company of a daughter who looked about four years old who mom was talking to as she smoked.  Mom wasn’t much of a looker and I may not have even counted her were she not pregnant.  Hardly ever do I get pregnant smoker sightings but I’ve been scoring them annually at my county fair now for going on a decade.

The only other smoking excitement during the grandstand show originated in the beer gardens about halfway through the concert when I saw two mid-20s gals with cigarettes walking inside the pavilion portion of the beer gardens.  I was impressed enough that these gals were walking in the indoor portion of the beer gardens with cigarettes but they had even more surprises about 30 seconds later when I spotted both cigarette-wielding ladies approaching the gate of the grandstand with a forbidden item in each hand–a beer and a cigarette (neither one is allowed in the grandstand).  There’s a young bouncer dude at the gate who stopped them from entering, and one of the two gals who seemed particularly feisty looked like she was loudly challenging him, but it soon became clear she was just messing with him.  The beer is not supposed to leave the beer gardens at this fair so both gals were violating the rules by possessing beer even where they did.  The two gals were both modest lookers, the less feisty one a dark blond in a conservative blouse and jeans who intrigued me most while the feistier girl was wearing a tanktop and shorts and was probably a little more attractive but managed to ruin it for me with a bunch of tattoos on her shoulders and upper back.  I’d actually see the tattooed feisty girl again near the end of the night…literally passed out on the grass in front of the beer gardens with a smoldering cigarette next to her.

The grandstand show by Thomas Rhett was definitely the highest energy of the three so far, although his brand of “bro country” isn’t really my thing.  I was disappointed that he didn’t seem to bring out more nicotine-starved young country cuties than he did, but there was a small sliver of salvation in the final minutes as I saw a familiar face in the smoking area….that beautiful 18-year-old blond who I saw emerging from the midway smoking a Camel Menthol before the show.  She was with the boyfriend and another of her nonsmoking blond friends standing there and, sure enough, she was removing a Camel Menthol from the pack in her purse and lighting up.  Not sure who to compare this girl to beyond an obscure reality show contestant but she really was a beauty.  Unfortunately, I only got to see a couple of drags before she and the group drifted into main part of the fair never to be seen again Thursday night.

The concert ended and Corey and I exited.  Corey once again cooperated by leaving immediately after the show, only this time I’d have another distraction as I bumped into my lunatic cousin Judd, who I had successfully dodged the two previous nights.  Judd had to work the next morning as well so he couldn’t stay either, so I only lost about 10 minutes, but it was a key 10 minutes right after the end of the show where a lot of smoker girls undoubtedly got their nicotine fix.  It still worked out okay though as the timing of Judd’s departure led me right to a group of 20-something guys and gals standing near the beer garden entrance where a cute blond gal in a white tanktop and pale blue jean shorts was smoking.  A bench was open not 10 feet in front of them and I had a perfect front-row seat.  She wasn’t the hottest girl at the fair but she was definitely very attractive, not to mention having a quality presentation in the tanktop and jean shorts.  I saw three decent drags and exhales before she crushed out the cigarette.  In seconds, the group wandered elsewhere and IDed her discarded butt….a Marlboro Light.

The next sighting I would get came a few minutes later and it was an unlikely lesbian sighting, featuring two attractive-by-stereotypical-lesbian-standards gals walking hand in hand, with the long-haired mid-20s brunette gal of the duo holding a cigarette in her other hand.  I followed them for a couple of drags and her drags were pretty impressive.  I’m not into the whole lesbian thing the way some guys are and this girl wasn’t hot enough to warrant more than a passing admiration before moving onto the next shiny object.

One of those shiny objects would be a returning champ from last night.  The 18ish curly/long-haired brunette beauty who on Wednesday night was smoking a Newport and then bummed another one to a black girl in her friends group resurfaced on Thursday night.  Now this girl was perfectly hot in her silver top and tight jeans on Wednesday night, but on Thursday she was rocking a white tanktop and perfectly fitting medium blue jean shorts that raised the stakes of her sex appeal about 20 degrees.  As I watched her walk by in this sexpot outfit and took a glance over my shoulder to admire her perfectly toned ass and legs, I thought to myself that I really hope I get to see this girl smoke again tonight.  And over the course of the next hour and a half I did….twice…sort of.  In both cases she was sitting down at benches in the presence of company in places where any extended observations on my part would have stuck out like a sore thumb.  So all I could do was linger briefly in both cases, admiring those smooth calves and that perfect ass seated on the bench when she wasn’t smoking and admiring her rock solid smoking style when she was smoking, complete with London fog-worthy exhales after every drag.  Despite only seeing three drags over the course of two cigarettes tonight, this girl who on Wednesday night nearly got lost in the crowd improved her position greatly and demanded to be respected for her skills as a smoker and her crazy feminine hotness.

Somewhere in between the two sightings of the brunette came my redemption from the night before on one I thought got away, although the sighting itself disappointed.  Remember on Wednesday night when I caught a young hottie and her friend emerging from near the grandstand area and walking towards the ladies’ bathroom with a pack of Marlboro Lights in her hand….one of which she had probably just got done smoking?  Well tonight my timing was a little better as I saw a girl emerging from the darkness near that same bathroom structure with a freshly lit cigarette in her hand.  I saw she was hot from afar as I approached, admiring her tanned features and tanned legs draped in a country girl tanktop and jean shorts with cowgirl boots.  It took me a few seconds to realize it was the same girl from Wednesday night and at first I was absolutely giddy thinking I’d get a full sighting of her.  I sort of did….but she must be a very bashful smoker as she proceeded to hide in the dark behind one of the carnival trailers to smoke her cigarette.  While she was in a dark spot, there was enough background illumination from the carnival to at least admire her show a limited amount.  I’m quite sure she was over 18 (she actually looks older than I suspect she is) so I’m a little perplexed by why she’s hiding while smoking.  She was in a big hurry to finish her cigarette and wrapped it up with rapid-fire drags and above-average exhales before dropping the cigarette to the grass and then migrating into the midway.  I walked up to where she stood and the two-thirds-smoked cigarette butt she left behind was a Marlboro Light, removing just about any doubt I may have had that it was the same girl from the night before.  I briefly followed her into the midway to get one final close-up look in the light.  She definitely had a “hard prettiness” to her, but I will say the previous night’s outfit of the black blouse and acid-washed jean shorts was more flattering on her than tonight’s country girl get-up.

And I’d get one more returning act from the night before…..the previous night’s group of 17ish guys and girls that included the redhead and the brunette who smoked two in a row.  I first laid eyes on them at a food stand near the beer gardens and while nobody was smoking yet, I didn’t figure that would last long.  Getting a closer look at them on Thursday compared to Wednesday, the dark brunette girl of the group was definitely the prettier of the girls and was dressed similar to the night before in a white T-shirt and tight jeans, but the redhead still topped her in the IT factor department.  She didn’t match the previous night’s outfit but still stood out in a red and white summery minidress.  About 15 minutes later, I’d see the group and they were indeed smoking this time, approaching the mini donuts stand.  I was able to find a place to sit and observe gingerly as they stood in front of the stand, smoking and conversing with the people inside the stand who they clearly knew.  I saw a little bit of smoking but managed to lose them at the time they lost their butts.  The night before I had some ambiguity about their brand and sadly that ambiguity continued on Thursday as I couldn’t identify which of the crushed out cigarette butts in front of the mini-donut stand were theirs.  I’d have one more passing encounter with this group that I’ll get into later…

The huddles of teenagers who inconveniently gather at the center of the grounds where there’s no good place to watch the girls smoke continued to deliver in spades.  I actually had a little better vantage point location of one girl, a 17ish curly-haired brunette smoking a cigarette with a nonsmoking friend while standing in between two food stands.  The girl wasn’t particularly gorgeous but she made up for her plain jane looks with a nice presentation with a plaid bare midriff country girl top and a pair of high-riding white shorts.  Had she been a perfect 10 beauty to go along with her body and outfit, this would have been an exceptional sighting, especially considering her deft smoking style and cloudy exhales that didn’t seem to bother the nonsmoking friend standing right in front of her at all.  It was still a great sighting, but there were just too many prettier faces with smoke billowing out of them at this fair for this girl to make the Hall of Fame.  I caught about five drags before she dropped the cigarette, crushed it out, and walked closer to the teen huddle.  I walked up and easily identified it as a Marlboro Light.

The teen huddle produced a much less logistically successful find about 15 minutes later and I could see a cigarette between the fingers of a blond in a tanktop and jean shorts from quite a distance away.  She was really packed tight into her mostly male huddle and it took awhile to get a good look.  She was pretty and looked about 17-18, although she had bright red lipstick that was a little over the top and looked a little clownish in contrast with her pale white skin.  Even so, I was lingering hoping to catch a drag and finally did, although I didn’t get to see as much as I’d like given the crowd she was immersed in so I changed locations.  I walked past her first as she wrapped her arm and cigarette hand around a nonsmoking guy, and looking at the all white butt that appeared to have an inverted filter, I suspected it was an increasingly rare Parliament sighting, a cigarette popular five years ago that has just gotten too expensive compared to its vaguely less overpriced peers.  Anyway, I found that different vantage point and hovered there even more awkwardly watching….and on two occasions she and one of the guys in the group were looking my direction.  It’s possible they were looking at other friends behind me but when they looked my direction twice I knew it was time to go.  I didn’t see nearly enough of this sighting as I hoped and didn’t get to confirm my suspicion that her cigarette was a Parliament.

As I so often do, I was preparing for my “final loop of the night” but managed to keep getting sidetracked and/or talking myself into yet another “final loop of the night”, but I am so damn glad I held out for one last walk through the nearly empty midway at about 11:20.  At the back of the midway I caught from behind the image of a girl I just knew was gonna be magic.  I saw this dark rear image of a girl with straight dark blond hair going all the way down her back, held down up top with a head band that had a little white bow on top.  A black sweatshirt and nice-fitting pair of dark jeans completed the conservative ensemble but there was one thing that didn’t fit at all with the rear silhouette image I was observing….an unlit cigarette protruding from the girl’s right hand.  A wide-open bench gave me a perfect vantage point of the sighting that would transpire….and I approached it giddy as a schoolgirl to get a look at the face and see if it lived up to the profile.  I thought I had prepared myself for the caliber of wholesomeness I was plunging head-first into but she exceeded my wildest expectations.  This girl was not only beautiful beyond belief, she ranks among the top two or three most unlikely smokers I’ve ever laid eyes on.  I’d put her at about 19 or 20 years old and her animated face just radiated sunshine and warmth.  I kept thinking this girl looks like she should be a counselor at a youth camp for Christ because her beaming, glowing presence just seemed naturally inclined to do something wholesome at all times, absolutely never including being at the county fair midway holding a cigarette in her hand….

And while it took me a while to collect myself after seeing a face this beautiful (she vaguely reminded me of actress Amanda Seyfried….only prettier), it took her more than just a while to light that cigarette.  She was cheering on a male and female friend preparing to ride the “Ring of Fire” thrill ride which hangs upside down.  She was giving her encouragement from the sideline so I was still confident of getting her to myself for the entirety of the ride the friends took.  Finally, after a good three minutes of holding the unlit cigarette in one hand and the lighter in the other, it was time to get to the part where she ingests carcinogens.  Her light-up was drama free but it still sent tingles throughout my body when her cigarette consumption became real.  The friends were just getting on the ride in time for her second and best drag, which was average in length but where a delayed exhale came out in the form of a sloppy smoky blob even as her face was more lit up than ever with a toothy grin as she watched the friends climb aboard the Ring of Fire.  And the exhale still wasn’t over as a residual puff escaped her nose a couple of seconds later.  A “smiling exhale”…I suppose I’ve seen one before but never one as animated as this.  Now more than ever it was hard to reconcile this saintly looking girl with the cancerous filth her body was addicted to.  The next drag was a little more traditional, with her exhale blown completely out of her mouth in a straight line…..

Unfortunately, remember when I said earlier that the mixed-gender group with the redheaded smoker and her brunette friend made one more appearance?  This was their moment as they coasted on past with both girls wielding cigarettes yet again!  Why can’t I ever get the timing right with these girls and be in a position to ID their butts?  It wasn’t gonna happen this time either as even a tow truck couldn’t pull me away from what was easily my best find of the night.  But of course my best find of the night couldn’t possibly follow the preferred script without a complication either.  Suddenly, some random overweight dude her age or slightly older approached her and she seemed to know him.  After taking a drag I couldn’t see, she suddenly handed the guy the cigarette.  NO!!!!!!  This led me to believe she was probably just a social smoker who didn’t need more than half of her cigarette and was looking for someone to take it away.  It was a letdown as the guy got his hands on the not-even-half-smoked cigarette and never returned it.  Still, I wanted to identify the brand this gorgeous dark blond was smoking.  The two friends who went on the thrill ride had just gotten off and the three of them, combined with the new smoker dude and a friend of his, were walking eastward out of the midway.  I followed, doing something I never suspected I would….waiting for a dude to finish his cigarette so I could get a butt ID.   After about three walking drags, he did finish it and drop it.  I looked down to see it was a white filter Marlboro with a little blue dot on the filter, which I believe are those Marlboro Nxts, the Marlboro version of Camel Crush.

The last sighting didn’t have the happy ending I hoped for but I ended up doing that final loop, managed to score one mediocre sighting over the next five minutes or so and was then headed for the exit to call it a night.  But on my way out, I saw a female face emerging near the beer gardens area with three friends (two male and one female) that immediately struck me as familiar as I watched a pack of Camel Lights emerge from the female’s purse.  It took about two seconds of admiring her face and light brunette hair, coupled with Camel Lights being her brand, and I recognized it was the 2012 FCF classic who will forever be known to me as the “woolly beret girl” (FCF #15).  There were two reasons I didn’t recognize her instantly.  First she was wearing a dark top and dark jeans, which contrasted with her usual pastel colors and white shorts and the like, and second, she was looking more mature.  The “woolly beret girl” I first saw in 2012 was very much a girl and probably 17 as I suspected at the time.  And in my successful encounter with her in 2013, she looked older than a girl but not yet a woman.  But in 2014, the little girl look is completely gone from my woolly beret girl who now looks like exactly what she was….a young woman with the weathered features of a long-time heavy smoker.  And what perfect timing I had as she opened up that pack of Camel Lights and placed an unlit cigarette in her lips just as she approached me.  As was the case last year, she was the only one in her group smoking and I turned around to follow and saw the light-up.  But that’s where the story took a surprise pivot.  It would take a lot for me to abandon my first sighting of the year of the old reliable woolly beret girl, but “a lot” was exactly what I was in store for……

At the exact moment the “woolly beret girl” lit up, I looked past her to find another group crossing paths with them.  It was the “Ring of Fire” midway group……and I was shocked when I saw the insanely wholesome hottie placing another unlit cigarette in her mouth.  This was her second in the last 15 minutes, and keep in mind I had written her off as a social smoker when she handed half of her cigarette to the fat guy moments earlier.  But now that seemed far less likely as “my greatest find of the night” raised her stakes dramatically by being the only member of her group of five to light up another cigarette.  She paused her walking briefly to light up and I could barely control myself from shouting for joy at the top of my lungs.  They were heading to the north side exit of the fairgrounds, the exact same exit I take on the way back to my grandma’s parking lot and I would be able to follow.  This couldn’t have worked out more perfectly.  She was more attentive in smoking this one as well, taking more frequent drags as she walked.  Unfortunately I had a mostly rear view and was usually only able to admire the exhaled smoke I saw flowing from her gorgeous face, but on a couple of occasions she turned her head while dragging and I got to see her lips pucker around that all-white filter and the cherry glow bright red.  While walking, the two guys (including the one that smoked half of her first cigarette) that seemed to come out of nowhere on the midway were hanging back, apparently not riding home with them.  I continued to follow as just the original three from the “Ring of Fire” ride progressed to a red sports car in a private lot in a guy’s yard.  The guy and girl who rode the Ring of Fire climbed into the front seat and I was waiting with baited breath to see what stinky girl would do.  I didn’t know if it would be sexier for her to drop her Marlboro Nxt butt into some stranger’s yard or to bring it inside the red sports car driven by obvious nonsmokers.  It could have gone either way as she opened the back door and took a deep drag…..but she broke the tie by closing the car door and bringing the cigarette with her.  Not only do the friends have to deal with her residual ciggy stench, but she’s actually going to smoke a cigarette inside a stranger’s likely expensive car.  I watched the car drive out of the lot….with the back window cracked and a smoldering cherry held between the fingers of a truly gorgeous young woman as it did.  An otherwise modest Thursday night ended with a grand slam.

So 20 sightings for Thursday which puts me at 71 for three days and still on pace–barely–to get in that 110-125 average range.  Friday’s crowd for country group Montgomery Gentry should be pretty good so I’m hopeful for a sightings surge then to get me within striking distance of my median.  Even if I fall short of my numbers preferences, however, the 2014 FCF has already been a giant success in delivering a steady diet of top-shelf sightings as it is nearly every year, with only a couple e-cig/vaporizer sightings by attractive young girls annoying me along the way.  It never ceases to amaze me how with cigarettes at over $8 a pack in Minnesota, so many teen girls are still ready, willing, and able to become smokers, but I definitely hope it continues.



Friday Night

While Thursday had been the weakest day so far at the 2014 county fair, there was no law saying that it had to remain the weakest day for the duration of the fair.  In this case, Thursday’s haul looks highly enviable after the very weak Friday night, where I scored only 16 sightings, only a few of which even warrant a writeup.  Not sure specifically what went wrong here but with the size of the crowd and the “party” demographic that showed up for country duo Montgomery Gentry, I never would have predicted at the beginning of the night that I’d have my weakest night of sightings at the county fair in several years.  I couldn’t have asked for more perfect weather either, but I did have lengthy sidetracks from Hurricane Corey that didn’t help.

I got to the fair around 6:30 and walked around as always, disappointed by the continued lack of production during the daytime hours.  I scored one mediocre sighting in a half hour worth of walking before hearing a “Hey Mark” from afar.  It was Corey, and at only a little after 7:00 I was resigned to being his bitch for the rest of the night.  He went to a food stand and ordered a burger.  I talked and halfheartedly scanned the comings and goings for smokers while doing so, seeing absolutely nothing.  The crowd for the grandstand was bigger than the previous three nights but there was still plenty of seating, and at around 7:45 we headed up there to my favorite spot.  While I’m resigned to the smoking area not being what it used to be in terms of drawing the preferred demographic for a smoke break, I was most disappointed in the beer gardens tonight which was teeming with people but only produced a few actual sightings.  The best of them was a duo of late 20s brunettes just inside the beer garden fence who on two occasions fired up a cigarette while swilling a beer.  Both were attractive but definitely not hot enough to ever be heard from again when it comes to my year-end favorites list.

However, the smoking area did produce my best sighting of night in the half hour before Montgomery Gentry took the stage.  Two young hotties emerged into the smoking area from out of nowhere and I caught one of them at the exact second she was lighting up, with a quick drag and exhale off of the lightup which remained dangling for a few more seconds.  It took me no time at all to recognize the smoker I had just set my eyes upon as a blond from Tuesday night in 2013, primarily because she was wearing the exact same memorable white dress she was wearing that night.  She looked about 22, had a very wholesome Elisha Cuthbert look about her and doesn’t really look like a smoker, so it was enjoyable to see her puffing away on her cigarette looking exactly like she did the night before.  Interestingly, the friend in the group–also a familiar face but not from smoking–looked much more like a smoker but apparently isn’t.  The sexy dark blond friend in a country girl top and jean shorts was working her phone as the blond smoker lit up and seconds later when she was putting her phone back into her purse, I was hopeful for a double sighting but it didn’t happen.  Shame too because they would have a made a hot smoking duo.  I got to see the blond in the white dress smoke the whole cigarette and it was a pleasure to see her skillfully take down the cigarette with nice drags and polished exhales before dropping it to the grass and crushing it out.  As the duo was about to go back into the grandstand for seating for the show, I briefly got my hopes up as coming outside and meeting them was a brunette babe in wildly sexy white cutoffs who I figured might be coming out to smoke herself.  She wouldn’t though and it would be the last I’d see of all three of them all night.

From there, while the concert was entertaining primarily because Montgomery Gentry has so many hits that their entire hour-and-a-half catalog of songs consisted of songs I knew, sightings were close to nonexistent in either the smoking area or the beer gardens.  The only development that got me excited was a familiar face popping up at the edge of the grandstand.  The beautiful blond “Sarah” from Wednesday night was back with her male friends at the concert, capturing the Montgomery Gentry concert with her camera phone, and wearing an outfit very similar to Wednesday night’s, a blue top and crazy sexy white shorts.  She kno-ooo-ooo-ws what I like!  Thankfully, I do have more to report from Sarah later in the night.

The concert ended and I wondered if Corey would immediately split as he did the previous three nights given that he didn’t have to work the next morning.  I got my answer right away when he asked “what do you wanna do?”  Ugh!  Working to my benefit is that the buildings close down shortly after 10 so going through them wasn’t gonna happen and we ended up walking around the grounds like I always do solo, only much more slowly and with much more distraction via our conversations.  This drug on for more than a half hour and I only scored one sighting while in his company, a modest 21ish cowgirl outside the bathroom who wouldn’t have been capable of being a classic sighting or anything, but it scared me that the “Great White Whale” could be walking right past us and I wouldn’t be able to follow.  Corey droned on and on about a mutual friend’s wedding and I was agonizing about how much I missed last year when Corey was gone for fair week and I didn’t have these kinds of unpredictable distractions. I like Corey, and definitely prefer to have company to go to the concerts with, but I don’t like the guy one damn bit the second the concerts end!!!

He finally decided to split as I figured he ultimately would as pacing the grounds is not his thing as it typically isn’t for normal people.  I had seen a silhouette of a blond hottie in a green summery dress smoking with her friends group near a remote line of a port-of-potties moments earlier and as soon as Corey departed I walked that direction to see if I could get a closer look.  Thankfully, I spotted her, and she was a pretty cute mid-20s blond, and the only one in her group smoking.  She was heading the same direction Corey was though and I didn’t want to go that way and risk getting tangled up with Corey again.  It was 10:45 now and I’d have more than an hour of fetishing left to make up for a lot of lost time.

And while I stitched together a few sightings here and there, there were only three memorable moments in that last hour.  The first was this cute and petite redheaded girl who looked about 16 standing with a cigarette at the edge of the midway.  She was so cute and in the presence of a curly haired friend I only saw from the rear but hoped might also smoke.  I saw a couple nice drags from this sweet redhead and while there was nothing unforgettable about them her girly girl profile still made this a fascinating find.  As the two started to walk away, the redhead handed the cigarette to the curly-haired blond friend and now I had to race ahead to see the face of the friend.  That’s when the sighting got a buzzkill.  It was a mediocre girl I already counted from Wednesday night and it became abundantly clear that this was her cigarette that the redheaded cutie just bummed 2-3 drags from.  And sure enough, a half hour later, I saw the two again and the blond was smoking while the redhead wasn’t.  The negative turn for this sighting kind of ended up defining my Friday night unfortunately.

A similarly clunky ending came for the next sighting which occurred on the series of benches at the front of the midway.  A group of four teenage friends–three girls and a guy–had one smoker amongst them….a 17ish long-haired brunette in a red tanktop and dark jeans.  The brunette was easily attractive enough to count as a sighting even though my favorites list from the fair seemed to have little danger of having her catapult to the top of it.  I sat down on a nearby bench hoping to see the sighting play out, but true to form, she got up and sprinted towards another group of friends standing behind me after showing me only one drag….and the guy in her group followed.  They lingered with those friends for a few minutes and then the girl and the guy progressed into the midway.  I followed in hope of a butt ID as her cigarette was near its end, but when she handed the cigarette to the boyfriend to finish it off, I decided I had too much ground to make up for to hold out for a butt ID from this girl and her boyfriend.

And while I was told by the carnival gal herself on Wednesday that the carnival stayed open till midnight on weekends, the lights went out around 11:15 and when that happens it really limits the amount of territory I have to navigate and raises my exposure level even higher. There was only one more girl who had anything good to show me Friday night….and that was sweet Sarah in her blue top and white shorts.  Unfortunately, just like Wednesday, she was immersed in a thick huddle of teenagers in the middle of the grounds where I had no hope of getting a prolonged sighting.  Grrrr!  When I saw she had an all-white cigarette lit, smoldering only inches away from those exceptional white shorts, I really pushed my luck and made two or three passes by their group hoping I’d time it right and catch one of her infrequent drags.  The best I could do was look from afar and see a plume of smoke rise from their group, knowing it came from her black lungs.  Oh Sarah!  Why can’t you smoke in a place where a fetisher can actually see you?!?!  If you did, I promise you that you’re good enough to be immortalized forever in my blog Hall of Fame!  As it stands though, unless she delivers a sighting I see more than two drags of before the fair ends, Sarah’s body of work has been too inaccessible to get the acclaim she’s worthy of.  On my final loop around the area, however, Sarah was not smoking again but checking out her ass I took note of something I missed on previous passes.  While her cell phone was clearly in the right back pocket of her shorts, her unidentifiable pack of cigarettes was in the left back pocket.  Never have I been more jealous of a pack of cigarettes.

So yeah….that’s it for Friday.  Considering my local county fair has been delivering something outstanding for me every single night for several years going, I felt let down walking away from last night with nothing all that great.  Worse yet, I’m up to only 87 sightings over four nights which is below average.  It’s possible I could still get the 30-some sightings necessary to match or exceed the hauls from the last two years, but the pattern of the last four nights has been shrinking returns.  I’m going into Saturday a bit demoralized but hopefully Friday was just an off night.  Remember that it was Saturday last year that I scored my dark brunette Pall Mall teen princess who would become my second-best county fair sighting of all time, so there is definitely some cause for optimism on the closing night of the 2014 FCF.



Saturday Night

A fetisher is gonna have a bad night now and then.  Certainly when it comes to visits to the malls and such, I’ve come to terms with that and have prepared for it.  But my county fair has been operating so far above its weight for so many consecutive nights over so many consecutive years now that it was actually quite a jarring wake-up on Friday evening when I had a pretty soft night.  While I suppose I could have bounced right back and had a spectacular Saturday night (remember just last year I scored my FCF #2 Pall Mall princess on Saturday night), for some reason I just sensed that I wouldn’t…..and I was right.  Strangely though, I’m okay with that as the night was a tick better than Friday and avoided being the rolling calamity I feared it might based on the first two minutes I spent at the fair, and I ended up scoring 23 sightings, far better than the previous night’s 16, although there definitely weren’t any rock stars among them aside from a returning favorite from years past.

What was the problem that arose in those first two minutes?  Rain!  Of the completely unforecasted variety!  On a weekend the meteorologists have been hyping all week as “absolutely perfect”!  It was just a light rain that lasted about 15 minutes and cleared out, but given that there were other storm cells to the west that ultimately died out before they arrived in my area, it probably held attendance numbers down as the storms came in just around the time some people may have otherwise been planning to come to the fair.  And tonight’s musical performer was 90s country singer Terri Clark who hasn’t had a hit in about 10 years and wouldn’t be likely to draw a very young demographic.  It all left me resigned to the likelihood that the best nights of the 2014 local county fair were behind me.

Still, I was under the impression from what I had just seen that the rain was moving just south of the hometown as I began my walk from my grandma’s garage to the fairgrounds, so imagine my surprise when I felt my first raindrops two steps after entering the gates.  The rain quickly picked up and I was racing for overhead coverage, ultimately settling under a tent in Machinery Hill on the north side of the fairgrounds.  I was bored out of my mind for a few minutes standing there waiting for the rain to stop but was taken aback when I heard a female voice shout “Mark!”  It was my 40-something cousin Chrissy who had seen me from afar and came to chat.  Better now than when it was dry when she’d be distracting me from sightings.  Her husband came over too and we chatted until the rain stopped about 10 minutes later.  I kind of fibbed and said I had to meet my friend for the concert and got busted for it when they saw me roaming alone two more times in the next hour before Corey got there.  This was the theme of Saturday night…..attendance on the grounds was below average but it was disproportionately relatives of mine who would be there as my parents showed up last night, my aunt and her friend, an aunt and uncle, this cousin and her husband….it all added up to one more headwind I’d face tonight in pursuit of quality sightings.

I was melancholy as I started trolling the grounds for sightings, telling myself if I get any sightings at all tonight I’d have to consider it a qualified success.  But thankfully after about a half hour of exploring I’d find one in line for the Terri Clark concert.  Most smokers in line tend to step slightly outside the line so as not to expose others in line to their smoke, so I was elated to see a late teen/early 20s Hispanic girl in a very feminine long skirt smoking with mom right there in the line, exhaling her smoke close enough to where a whole line of people was smelling it.  I turned around a few yards after my first pass and made another to get a better look at this girl.  The good news:  she was very cute and, particularly with as low as smoking rates are among young Latinas, seemed a really unlikely smoker to be sucking down a cigarette in the presence of a nonsmoking Latina mother who at least at the time was not smoking.  The bad news:  she had a serious acne problem, with very distracting pimples taking away from her otherwise beautiful face.  As I was taking this second pass, I spotted a group where another attractive early 20s blond had a unlit cigarette between her fingers.  I contemplated following her, but honestly this sweet Latina smoking in line next to mom intrigued me more so I hung back and watched from afar as she took a couple more drags right there in line, showing off a solid if undistinguished smoking style.  She surprised me, however, when she got out of line and began to walk southward.  It was fun following the girl in the black blouse and pretty long skirt knowing she was smoking a cigarette, but the cigarette was almost gone and she drifted towards a garbage can where she crushed the cigarette out on the pavement and then threw the cigarette away, denying me the butt ID.  If not for the unfortunate pimple problem, this girl would have been a top-tier find, and managed to deliver something my way that was better than I really expected that Saturday night was capable of only a half hour earlier.

I then began wandering up to the south side of the grounds, with that blond who I had just seen walking with the unlit cigarette always in the back of my mind.  And sure enough, only a few minutes later, I spotted her, the other girl, and the two guys in her group all watching this wood carver guy with a chainsaw, and the blond and her boyfriend were still smoking.  She was wearing a gold and black blouse with tight black slacks that framed her figure nicely.  She wasn’t as pretty as my Latina would have been if not for the Latina’s zit saturation, but this girl had a clean presentation and was also a nice smoker as I watched her with one eye and pretended to watch the wood carver with the other before walking away.  Maybe this night wouldn’t be so bad after all!!!

I scored one more mediocre sighting before getting my fair food (barely feeling well enough to eat another gyro on the last night of the fair) and got in the grandstand for the show around 7:45, with Corey running a little late.  Within a few minutes after arrival, my best sighting of the night would emerge from a long-familiar face whose been getting documentation from my county fair write-ups going back to 2010 now…..the long-haired blond beauty I’ve long referred to as “Old Reliable”.  It took me a few seconds to recognize it was the girl who must now be in her late 20s but looks hotter than ever, decked out in a shoulderless black blouse, tight dark jeans, and cowgirl boots as she stood in the smoking area and lit up.  Ah the pleasing familiarity of her smoking style, where the missiles of exhaled smoke were either fired straight down or straight up, was comfort food for the weary soul, especially here in the smoking area where they were missed last year…..

On multiple nights in 2010, 2011, and 2012, I could count on Miss Old Reliable to step out for two or three cigarettes per night during at least two concert evenings a week.  She seemed to be getting a little pudgy in 2012 but her pretty face and smoking reliability helped me overlook it.  Then in 2013, while I didn’t see her at any of the concerts, I saw her playing BINGO having lost a bunch of weight and looking sexy as hell smoking two Marlboro Menthols in a row while playing BINGO.  But now my Old Reliable girl was still minus the chub but back in her natural surroundings of the grandstand smoking area.  Another overweight middle-aged gal emerged to smoke and made conversation with Old Reliable.  Not sure if they knew each other or were just bonding as smokers.  Either way, I got to watch the whole performance and the surprising after party.  Old Reliable was walking back into the grandstand and coming up my aisle, walking right past me and then sitting down on a bench only about five rows behind me, where I hadn’t even seen her before the smoke break.  She was settling into a group that consisted of an overweight middle-aged woman, a thin young dark blond girl, and the guy who was her nonsmoking boyfriend last year at the BINGO pavilion who is apparently her nonsmoking boyfriend still this year.  I get the feeling this guy has the fetish, and I give bonus points to Old Reliable for dating a nonsmoker.  I was pretty confident I hadn’t seen the last of Old Reliable puffing away in that smoking area and I was right.

In the next half hour before and during the Terri Clark concert, I pieced together a few more modest sightings play out inside the fence of the beer gardens, including a mother-daughter sighting where the trashy redheaded early 20s daughter was just barely cute enough to count.  Her friend, a more slender and somewhat cuter early 20s blond in jean shorts, also lit up so I got two for the price of one here.  But it was Old Reliable’s second cigarette about a half hour before the first that got me excited again…..and this time she had a couple of rowdy friends joining her!  I could have sworn that the chubby middle-aged woman sitting in Old Reliable’s group was her mom and that the younger girl was presumably her sister, as I knew I had seen them smoking with her before in years past.  Did everybody but her quit since she made her first trip to the smoking area solo?  Nope!  All three ladies ventured to the smoking area this time (adorably everybody but Old Reliable’s boyfriend) and all lit up.  It was a nice show too, and the younger sister who looked 21-22 was better looking and a better smoker than I remembered her from 2011.  Old Reliable remained the star of the show though, exhaling downward 9 times out of 10 and creating a smoke blast that almost resembled a meterological graphic for wind with a cartoon cloud blowing huge exhales….except in Old Reliable’s case it was smoke she was blowing and not wind.  The girl has style and volume with her smoking and on a night with few bells and whistles, she was a welcome treat.  The show would end in a few minutes and the mom and younger sister made their way to the beer garden while Old Reliable came back into the grandstand to sit with the boyfriend for the rest of the show, not to be seen smoking again unfortunately.  Old Reliable still hasn’t claimed a position in my Hall of Fame because none of her individual sightings has been HOF-worthy.  Not sure how I’d structure a blog write-up about her with snippets from five consecutive years, but it’s really getting to the point where this girl deserves her own individual post on my blog.

I scored another handful of sightings from the smoking area and beer gardens before the concert’s end, making this the most productive night numbers-wise from the area, much to my surprise.  There was a cute late 20s cowgirl in a big hat, white T-shirt and jeans who was part of two young couples at the edge of the smoking area.  She was a very attractive smoker but I wasn’t in a position to see much from her.  I was better-positioned to see what I presumed was a young gal working inside the beer gardens heading outside of its indoor pavilion on a smoke break.  She was an attractive mid-20s blond in an eye-catching red and white summer dress who was rapidly sucking down a cigarette while leaning against the outside of the blond.  Some middle-aged guy from the beer gardens followed her and gave her some good-natured grief, which she seemed to play along with without missing a beat.  It was too far back to make out any particularly terrific details and it seemed to play out over the course of only about three minutes before she bolted back into the building, but it was my last moment of glory at the 2014 FCF that took place in the beer gardens or smoking area….or just about anywhere for that matter!

The Terri Clark concert was above-average and ended at about 10 minutes till 10.  I just had a feeling that Corey following me around to gab at the fairgrounds was gonna happen just like the night before and I was right.  I didn’t get as irritated about it tonight though since so many of my family members were there (including my parents!) and were lingering, chatting amongst each other on the fairgrounds.  Having Corey walk with me around the grounds made the prospect of being seen wandering aimlessly multiple times by my parents or other relatives slightly less awkward.  Still, it was in no way the same exploring the grounds at half pace with Corey, engaging in very distracting conversation while trying to survey the crowd for stinky little girls.  And my ball and chain for the night stuck around for almost 45 minutes before leaving tonight to boot, confirming my original suspicion that this would likely be another lost night.  My best and only real new find during this period came on the midway as a trio of decently attractive 17-18ish girls included a blond in the middle in a white tanktop and acid-washed jean shorts holding a mostly smoked cigarette.  I only got a few seconds in passing to look her way and couldn’t follow because I was joined at the hip with Corey.

But I did get one nice follow-up sighting during that long walk with Corey, also from the midway.  Remember on Friday night when I saw that cute little 17ish redhead smoking but the sighting lost some cache when she handed the cigarette to her less attractive curly haired blond friend who smoked the rest of the cigarette.  The good news is that the cute little redhead was back with a new group of friends having just entered the fairgrounds from the midway entrance, wearing another conservative ensemble of black sweatshirt and dark blue jeans, only this time with a cigarette all to herself as the curly haired friend was nowhere in sight and nobody else in the group was smoking.  Apparently she was doing more than just taking a couple of drags off the friend’s cigarette the night before and she’s really a daily smoker.  The bad news is that I couldn’t follow and see more or ID the butt because of Corey.  Cockblocking me from seeing that sighting play out would end up being Corey’s worst example of interference at the 2014 FCF.

Corey left around 10:45 and I finally got the rest of the night to explore the less-populated-than-they-should-be grounds, but the rest of the night would end up being a big steaming bust.  And another big part of the problem this year happened again tonight, despite my assurance that it wouldn’t.  The midway that was supposed to stay open until midnight tonight and has every night in previous years until midnight went black around 11:15, cutting off a big portion of the crowd as well as a needed avenue for exploration in these small grounds.  By 11:20, under the new midway hours, you have a very shrunken territory to explore and fewer people there than previous years, giving me little choice but to leave by 11:30 tonight, a half hour earlier than previous years.

On my way out, looking to boost my lethargic numbers for the night by whatever means possible, I decided to approach the fence of the beer gardens and peek inside, hoping just maybe there would be young hotties smoking who I hadn’t seen earlier in the night…..and as luck would have it, there were.  A couple of late 20s blonds in summer dresses were barely visible in the darkness of my vantage point but I could tell they were both attractive and watching them both smoke in front of my eyes.  Pleased with this, I walked off to my car, leaving the county fair behind for another year.  On my way to the car, I saw a red car at the stoplight with a clearly attractive 18-21ish blond driver smoking.  What the hell, I thought, let’s count her in this year’s haul as well despite the very limited vantage point I  had of her.

So as I climbed into my car, I wrapped up the evening with 23 sightings and wrapped up the 2014 local county fair with 110 sightings, in the same general league as the previous two years but still down.  But when taking into account the headwinds I faced, particularly in the last couple of nights, being down less than 8% from last year in total sightings doesn’t seem so bad, as my evenings were cut short in both directions by Corey and the early lights-out at the midway.  Impossible not to acknowledge, however, that my local county fair came back down to Earth some in 2014, after having spent so many years riding in the clouds seemingly impervious to the concept of a weak night.  At one level, the week’s disappointing ending makes it easy to forget how great the first two days were. But at another level, the last thing I need at the county fair is for everybody to leave earlier than they have in years past, and my fear is that that is happening by design as a means to get the kids home and out of the fairgrounds earlier in the night.  If this is indeed the new normal, I can probably count on diminishing sightings returns in years ahead.  Whatever the case, I still had a good year at my county fair, albeit it not a great year like the last four or five have all been.


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