I’m not expecting too many people to take that close of an interest in my personal smoking fetish history, but if for no other reason that a fun little bookkeeping compilation, I thought I would do a year-by-year analysis of how my smoking fetish has evolved. I am someone who was hard-wired for the smoking fetish, as many of my earliest memories revolve around fantasizing about female smokers, and in defiance of the psychological stereotype, I didn’t have a mother who smoked that facilitated the onset of the fetish. I’m also welcoming any stories from others regarding their smoking fetish history. Anyway, here goes….
1985–While I suspect I was fantasizing about smoking even before this point, my earliest memories of actual sexualized fantasies came in first and second grade, when I’d go to bed at night and dream about girls in my class smoking cigarettes and cigars, long before I held traditional sexual feelings for girls. And yes, my cigar fetish was hard-wired into me from the get-go just like the cigarette fetish.
1986–I remember my fantasies about female classmates smoking accelerating as I proceeded into second and third grade, but the pivotal moment of smoking fetish acceleration in 1986 came with, of all things, a story relayed to me by my cousin. In the summer of 1986, my 10-year-old cousin blew my mind with a story of a four-year-old Hispanic girl on the beach of the lake in my hometown who was smoking with mom’s permission. While I got off on the story, my cousin told some tall tales in his day and I wasn’t sure if the story could be believed….until the next week when I heard his mom relay the story to my mom word for word. For months to come, I was fantasizing about this image of a four-year-old Hispanic girl smoking four cigarettes in a half an hour, all of which mom lit up for her, amidst the stunned glances of others on the beach. My sexuality, still barely in its infancy, was very quickly being defined by female smoking. Interestingly, however, adult women smoking did absolutely nothing for me at this age.
1987–The first flesh-and-blood female whose smoking was tangibly sexualized for me was Darla, a high school girl who rode my bus in the spring of 1987 when I was in third grade, a memory outlined in detail in this blog (Random #6). Early that summer, I got burned by the cigarette of another high school girl in line for a ride at the Worlds of Fun amusement park in Kansas City (Random #44), giving me further tangible smoker girl associations beyond my fantasies about elementary classmates. I tried my first cigarette at this age as well, sneaking one from my dad and lighting up in the basement, not impressed and not taking to the habit. But as intense as my cigarette fetish was becoming, my strongest fetish continued to be for cigars. It was so bad that when watching the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life” during Christmastime, the scene where Potter and George Bailey were smoking cigars in Potter’s office led me to a fantasy of cigar smoking girls to the point that I was distracted from the movie for at least 15 minutes.
1988 and 1989–While smoking continued to be front and center in my sexual fantasies, there wasn’t much to advance my fetish in those late elementary years, particularly in 1988. I did have a couple pivotal early sightings in 1989 singled-out on the blog, including the first girl my age I ever saw smoking (Random #17) and the moment when my religious education teacher’s teenage daughter asked me to hold her cigarette briefly (Random #18), which happened just before Christmas in 1989.
1990–This was the year when puberty officially set in and my attraction to girls became sexual outside of the smoking fetish. But as you may suspect, this sexualization grew in tandem with the fetish as girls my age were now smoking. In late sixth grade in the spring of 1990, I learned that Ramona and Teresa, classmates who were going out with a couple of buddies of mine, were the first out-of-the-closet smokers in my class…and they were pretty cute too. I never actually saw them smoking, but overheard conversations (including with their nonsmoking boyfriends) where they referenced their smoking. I thought this was the coolest thing in the world and got off fantasizing about it at night. By summer, my dad was doing vinyl repair work on car interiors at southern Minnesota car lots, affording me the opportunity to sit in the truck waiting for him, and a few times I got to admire early teen girls walking the sidewalks wielding cigarettes. But the pinnacle moment of 1990 came late in the year in Minneapolis, documented in my Random #5 sighting. An early teen girl who looked like my top seventh grade crush was smoking publicly and I got to watch her smoke an entire cigarette while waiting at a bus stop. It finally became real to me that girls my age were increasingly becoming cigarette smokers, making my sexual fantasies all the more intense and satisfying
1991–As rumors abounded of even more girls in my middle school becoming smokers, I would often gratify myself going down the class list and fantasizing about all the cute girls smoking. I would say my boyhood fetish sort of peaked in the summer in 1991, as I remember going to public venues like the Rochesterfest parade in Minnesota specifically looking for young girls smoking, something I hadn’t done before and really didn’t do again for quite some time. Not sure why my fetish declined in intensity in the years following, but it couldn’t have happened at a worse time because if my fetish had kept gaining momentum after seventh grade, perhaps I would have been more motivated to overcome my boyhood shyness and come out of my shell.
1992–Perhaps the least momentous year of my fetish since my earliest memories of life was 1992, when I didn’t score any memorable sightings and my fantasies of smoker girls atrophied as a result of the declining encounters. The only incident I remember at all was discovering from another of my middle-school crushes (Jenny) that she was a smoker. Jenny would become more prominent in my life the following year, but it’s rather amazing how little the revelation of her smoking did for me at the time.
1993–Even though I was still far too detached from my fetish than I should have been at the time, 1993 was still a very pivotal year. After seven prior years of attendance, I scored my first memorable sighting of young teen girls smoking at the Minnesota State Fair in 1993 (MNSF #27), shortly after my 16th birthday. While it wasn’t as big of a deal to me then as it is today, the occasion certainly planted a seed that would blossom in a big ways in the near future. Also, the aforementioned Jenny got her driver’s license by the fall of 1993 and with the freedom of the wheels came some fascinating smoky episodes with Jenny and her smoker friend Rachel, the details of which I will leave up to the imagination.
1994 and 1995–The momentum from 1993 did not carry over much into the next two years. Tragically, my shyness prevented me from taking advantage of my teen years, and giving the rising teen girl smoking rate at the time, my isolation from the social scene was all the more tragic. While I stitched together a few sightings here and there both years, my strongest smoking memory was connected to the mid-90s surge in women smoking cigars, which was covered in a couple of news stories. The internet wasn’t around yet, at least at my place, so I would record these news stories on the VCR and replay the tape, getting instantly hard at the sight of some of these attractive young women smoking cigars. The smoking fetish was still publicly dormant, but very few sexual thoughts crossed my mind that didn’t involve smoking, and cigars were more prevalent than ever in those fantasies.
1996–The year I graduated high school and started college had a number of pivotal moments for my smoking fetish. During the spring, I made my first visit to the Iowa campus where I’d be attending school a few months later, and while I wasn’t really looking forward to going off to college, the sight of a college girl smoking a cigarette in front of the student union let me know there would be at least one part of college life that would appeal to me. And my friend Dan, who I’ve mentioned several times in my blog, started a job as a cook at a restaurant near our high school in the months before graduation, and always talked about how the waitresses there were all uber-hot chicks from a neighboring town, but bemoaned the fact that they were all smokers. I never told him about my fetish, but made a point of picking his brain for details about that job and the girls he worked with, often hiding my erection as best as I could as he described them. But far and away the top moment for my smoking fetish in 1996 was the “State Fair Girls” sighting (MNSF #1), the heavy-smoking teen foursome at an outdoor concert that finally cemented a lifelong smoking fetish for me.
1997–A largely lateral year for my fetish, regrettably so given that 1997 was the peak year for the 90s teen girl smoking boom. I scored a few good sightings on my college campus….I scored a few good sightings while running errands at my summer job….and I scored a couple of sightings at the local county fair and Minnesota State Fair. But for the last year of my life, I never had smoker girl sightings on my mind on a day to day basis in 1997.
1998–This was the year when my smoking fetish escalated to an obsession, even though it still wasn’t official. Evening news reports were chronicling the rising incidence of teen smoking and college student smoking, a trend that had flown under the radar of the mainstream media up until the late 1990s, and my attentiveness for girls smoking began to accelerate on a day to day basis. But the real tipping point for me that year was my summer job as a mail carrier in my hometown which delivered a couple of classic sightings itself (Random #9 and #14), but more importantly connected me with blond, 20-year-old coworker Andrea, a light smoker and the subject of my all-too-brief summer romance, not to mention the ultimate inspiration for my popular Gretchen character. Suddenly I was peering through car windows to see if the girls behind the wheel were smoking for the first time in my life. The fetish had a hold of me, but caught fire still more over the holidays when it was revealed that Cousin Jamie had started smoking. I hadn’t seen it yet, but I had a year’s worth of sexual fantasies just based on hearing that she was smoking.
1999–At the dusk of the last millennium, the lifelong momentum I had built leading to my coming to terms with my own smoking fetish was finally fulfilled. In the spring of 1999, as I fantasized about getting back together with Andrea from the summer before, I was consumed with female smoking in a way I had never been before, using my drive home from college to recollect all of the sightings of smoker girls I had ever encountered. This led me to do a random internet search of girls smoking one Tuesday night in May. I stumbled onto the smoking fetish websites and my life was never the same. Unfortunately, that summer was a disaster as I returned home to find Andrea didn’t return and my mail carrier job fell through the cracks at the last minute. Furthermore, I had no internet access to keep the momentum going from the fetish sites I just discovered. Still, I sought out and savored sightings in a way I never did before, scoring a classic at my local county fair and another pivotal one at the Minnesota State Fair. I returned to campus and starting flexing my muscles creatively, writing my earliest smoking fetish stories for the Smoke Signals board. And capstoning the year was the rumor from the previous holiday season becoming official….I got to see Cousin Jamie smoking…publicly…in front of the family….at the Thanksgiving table (Random #2). Looking back at my smoking fetish, 1999 was far and away the most important and pivotal year.
2000–In my final months of college, I had a huge creative spurt and cranked out a half dozen or so smoking fetish fiction pieces, all of which were over-the-top fantasies come to life and most of which were well-received. Beyond that, however, my smoking fetish didn’t have much new material to feed off of in the first half of 2000, but after college, I moved back in with the folks for a while and as I was looking for work, found myself sidetracked by a medium I just discovered after the purchase of a home computer….the internet chatroom. At about the midpoint in the summer of 2000, I started chatting with young girls on these chatrooms and began to discover a number of them were smokers. A new “monster” was born and I became acquainted with a large number of girls, my age and younger, who were smokers, and it was fascinating to learn their stories and have them develop crushes on me. The girl who captured my fancy the most was 14-year-old Alissa from Indiana, who was smoking a pack and a half a day and was only going into the ninth grade and whose incredible, life-changing story I posted in full in a recent entry. Needless to say, the momentum of my smoking fetish just kept raging forward after meeting her, and scoring the best young smoker sighting of my life at the 2000 Minnesota State Fair (the ever-popular MNSF #2) also helped escalate that aspect of my fetish footprint.
2001–The momentum of my smoking fetish carried forward nicely into 2001 as I maintained continued satisfying contact with several of the smoker girls I met on online chatrooms, and I met a few more as well, including a couple who would become more than just online crushes. That summer, I met Dana, my most serious girlfriend, and a 21-year-old pack a day college girl. While I had had brief flings with smoker girls before coming to terms with my fetish, Dana was the first smoker I went out with who knew about my fetish and was all too happy to indulge it, allowing me to realize a number of the fetish fantasies I had dreamed about in the two years prior. Despite the fallout from 9/11, those late months in 2001 were some of the most exciting of my life. 2001 was also the first year in which I kept track of my sightings bounty of attractive female smokers at the Minnesota State Fair, ending the day with more than 100 sightings. Even though I missed the peak years of the 90s teen smoking renaissance, I nonetheless came to terms with my fetish at a uniquely productive time in my life and my successes in 2001 were the culmination of that.
2002–This was a year of disappointment and terrible timing as it relates to my smoking fetish, and life in general for that matter. Even though Dana and I continued to be an off-and-on item through 2009, she was slipping away from me throughout the spring and summer of 2002. While Dana was slipping away, another virginal recent high school grad named Kayla was fighting hard for me, but I held on to Dana for too long and the window closed on heavy-smoking Kayla by the time I welcomed her in. On top of my personal heartbreaks with nicotine-addicted girls, I had unimpressive hauls at my fair venues that year as well, and my online chat time diminished with my newspaper job consuming so much of my time. But there was one shining light of the year 2002, and it was a big one…..Cousin Jamie’s wedding dance in June, still standing tall atop my Random sightings list and what will almost certainly rate as the best smoking fetish night of my life.
2003–Another mediocre year. I had a brief resurgence with Dana, but she moved to Memphis that year and even though we flirted with the long-distance thing, it was doomed to fail. I had a fling with a “former smoker” who I worked with for awhile and had a hell of a thing going with a very hot nonsmoking girl with a fetish for guys who smoke (!) but by and large I was dependent on random sightings and a decent haul from my fairs for my fetish fix in 2003. I was also busted and called out for fetishing by a couple of girls in Aberdeen, South Dakota, in 2003, the first of only two times where that ever happened. And for all the trouble I got in watching them, the girls never even lit up!
2004–I had an intense but ultimately doomed-to-fail rekindling of the flame with Dana in 2004, and with the distance between us I look back at keeping that flame alive as a huge mistake. Beyond that, I had exactly one fetish high point in 2004 and that was the Minnesota State Fair, where I had my best sightings haul ever up to that point in time, scoring a handful of sightings still on this blog’s greatest hits list, including a cigar girl who still rates amongst my top-10 (MNSF #7).
2005–I was cut loose from my newspaper job early in the year, and despite the loss of income, it was the best thing that ever happened to me, both in terms of getting me out of a dead-end situation and in setting the stage for the much more fetish-friendly existence I enjoy in my new life. After a couple of stagnant years, the fetish really catapulted back to earlier levels for me in 2005 and the tipping point was probably my epic local county fair that year which produced three of my top-five FCF sightings of all-time, including the early teen cutie that is my almost certainly forever FCF #1. While the Minnesota State Fair that year disappointed, I had a spattering of other solid sightings that year as well and an intangible sense of better times ahead that panned out.
2006–Only a couple of weeks into the new year, I scored a solid new job in central Iowa and moved to the sightings-friendly blocks of apartment buildings where I still reside. Freed from the limitations of my small-town upbringing, I now had a much larger platform for fetishing, and already on the second day of my new job, I scored the megasighting (Random #3) of the cosmetology class smoking en masse while seated on the steps of a nearby state building. Not a bad welcoming gift from the state of Iowa! Later that year, my apartment cluster really began to deliver as well, and my first memorable smoking regular was the “Jenna Bush lookalike” (Random #33) who could be counted upon to light up a cigarette on her way to work every single morning I encountered her. Wide-open fetishing at central Iowa malls because a regular fixture of my fetish in 2006 as well, and I got my first sample of online dating, which happened to be a very heavy-smoking 25-year-old brunette….who turned out to be a prostitute! But the biggest door that was opened to me in my new location was the Iowa State Fair, which I attended for the first time in 2006 and had an exceptional day, scoring two of my three best ISF sightings of all-time. And my increased efficiencies and allotted fetish time helped the local county fair and Minnesota State Fair also rise in their magnitude in 2006, the first year in which my current litany of smoking fetish routines took form.
2007–All of the new venues in central Iowa where I began fetishing in 2006 (the malls, Summerfest, Iowa State Fair) continued to be fetish hotspots in 2007, but the biggest story connected to my fetish is 2007 came from my successful adventures in online dating that year. I was fortunate because 2007 was the last year in which smoking was allowed in bars and restaurants in Minnesota and Iowa, and I went out in style with three different girls who could be counted upon to leave my nose burning with smoky odor in the days following our evenings out. One girl was a brainy mid-20s brunette named Amanda who smoked Newports and was the most intellectually stimulating. Another was former high school crush Krissy who I hit it off with big-time at the 10-year class reunion and who I got some serious deferred gratification at age 28 with some smoky, gropy, kissyface dates. But the grand prize had to be Elise, who was actually the roommate of a girl I met online but had no chemistry with. Elise was the heaviest smoker I’ve ever been with….the kind of girl who could come over for the night and leave a full-sized plastic ashtray absolutely overflowing with Marlboro Light and Marlboro Light Menthol butts (she alternated) by the time she left. Aside from my stinky dates circa 2007, another key moment of the year was the epic brunette I saw at the Casey’s gas station in June of that year (Random #12) who inspired my first incarnation of a top-25 smoker sightings list, serving as a baseline for what would be my blog a few years later.
2008–All of my 2007 romantic escapades either ended or else pressed forward in a diminished capacity in 2008, which was a generally weak year for my fetish. I wasted a lot of time courting a hot smoker girl who proved unreliable. And as I said in my writeup about Alissa, I reconnected with her on Myspace in June and we flirted with the prospect of consummating our long-time smoldering courtship, but extenuating circumstances prevented that from occurring. The only genuinely positive fetish development that came in 2008 was that it was hands-down my best day ever fetishing at the Minnesota State Fair, setting the bar for what a perfect 13 hours of fetishing feels like.
2009–I had some pretty good luck with the smoky ladies again in 2009, even though the girl who defined the year happened to be a nonsmoker. As far as the sightings, it was a solid if unspectacular year, but I had one shining night that happened to be fireworks night at the 2009 Summerfest just down the street from where I live. Two of my all-time favorite Summerfest sightings occurred that night, including my #1, and a flurry of additional top-tier sightings. There are few things in life that get the adrenaline going better than a brief span in which you get to see all kinds of pretty girls smoking, and I had such a night in July 2009.
2010–A solid year all around with a flurry of smoky dates, two of the most intriguing of which included heavy-smoking 18-year-old high school girl Courtney and cigar-smoking 18-year-old college freshman Jerica. In addition, all of my summer rituals delivered in a big way with great sightings, especially the Iowa State Fair where my all-day Saturday trip produced a half dozen sightings still in my all-time top-25 ISF sightings of all-time. It was my second best day of fairgrounds fetishing of all-time. I also had my best local county fair ever in 2010.
2011–I had another well-above-average year with the young smoker girls in 2011 with a great deal of smoking occurring in my apartment due to overnight stays by two girls in particular. I also had another well-above-average summer fair schedule where all three venues served up a consistent diet of sexy smoker girls in defiance to the national trendline of declining smoking rates. One sighting in particular burned up the competition and that was a gorgeous perfect 10 brunette smoking a big cigar at the Iowa State Fair (ISF #1).
2012–Here was the year when there a tangible reversal in my momentum on many fronts. The smoky dates became fewer and further between for a variety of reasons, and the borrowed time I’ve been living on with the 18-21 set seems to be expiring as I’m finally getting to the point where I’m too old to interest them. The smoking area at Target Field where the Minnesota Twins play was taken away which struck me as ominous sign for the future even of outdoor smoking at the venues I frequent. I hung on for one final year with wide-open smoking at all my fairgrounds, where I had a solid Minnesota State Fair, an exceptional local county fair, and a below-average Iowa State Fair. I can’t help but feel the window is closing on the good times however.
2013–The new year is only six weeks old as of this writing and it’s already starting out on a sour note. Wide-open smoking at the Minnesota State Fair, my most treasured sightings venue, is over, replaced with designated smoking areas that will seriously cramp my style. No word yet on the other two fair venues for this coming year, but it’s a safe bet that it’s only a matter of time before they fold as well. Furthermore, Minnesota has massive new tobacco taxes on the table in the legislature that stand a very good chance of passing which will be a major wet blanket on both my local county fair and Minnesota State Fair if enacted. Hopefully the next 46 weeks of 2013 will prove friendlier to my fetish than the first six have been, but I’m not confident. Sure seems like the quasi-good times are almost over.