The Minnesota State Fair is my favorite sightings venue of the year. It has been delivering for me consistently since I was a boy and has been the source of a long list of my best sightings of all-time. Going back to 1993, I have scored 2,506 sightings at the Minnesota State Fair. The list has become so long that I’ve written my own shorthand version of a top-250 sightings of all-time from the MNSF. And even that list only represents about 12% of total sightings over the last 20 years. From there I’ve narrowed it down to a top-85 list…
Below I will make two separate lists. The first is the total number of sightings I scored each year at the Minnesota State Fair since I started keeping count. The second is a numerical breakdown of my top-85 sightings year by year. It’s not easy to explain but hopefully it’ll make since when you see the chart….
Chart 1
1993–2 sightings
1994–0
1995–1
1996–6
1997–1
1998–4
1999–6
2000–6
2001–106
2002–105
2003–106
2004–109
2005–101
2006–165
2007–184
2008–192
2009, Trip 1–206
2009, Trip 2—95
2010, Trip 1—117
2010, Trip 2—212
2011, Trip 1–194
2011, Trip 2–203
2012, Trip 1–186
2012, Trip 2–199
Some more specifics about the figures in Chart 1 below. But first Chart 2, the distribution of my top-85 sightings year-to-year….
Chart 2
1993–29
1994
1995–67
1996–1
1997
1998
1999–50
2000–2, 11, 66
2001–8, 15
2002–44, 65
2003–19, 26, 30
2004–7, 18, 37, 42, 56
2005–39, 73
2006–4, 12, 20, 38, 78
2007–9, 16, 17, 31, 60, 77, 81, 84
2008–3, 6, 22, 27, 32, 47, 74, 80, 83
2009, Trip 1–28, 45, 82
2009, Trip 2–13, 34, 57, 63, 68, 79
2010, Trip 1—10, 33, 58, 62, 75
2010, Trip 2—5, 40, 49, 52, 70
2011 , Trip 1–14, 43, 51, 54, 64, 85
2011, Trip 2–21, 24, 48, 53, 61, 69, 71
2012, Trip 1–25, 35, 41, 76
2012, Trip 2–23, 36, 46, 55, 59, 72
Now I’ll do a brief year-to-year synopsis to accompany the charts….
1993–The year I finally broke through with my first memorable sighting after eight years of attending the Minnesota State Fair with a bourgeoning but still undefined smoking fetish. I had just turned 16 a couple days before my first consequential MNSF sighting transpired, and I couldn’t have asked for a better “sweet 16″ gift. Grade: B+
1994–It was just my mom and I this year as my dad had to work. Sightings of smokers were not on my mind and I spent much of my day at free country music concerts in the bandshell. This was the only year of the last 18 where I didn’t score a single memorable sighting. Grade: Incomplete
1995–Another year of just my mom and I. Pretty much a carbon copy of the year before except for one significant development…..a vintage sighting of a hot blonde near the sandcastles that remains in my top-85 of all-time 16 years later. I had just turned 18 and on my continued slow road to having a defined smoking fetish. This sighting was one more stepping stone on that road. Grade: B
1996–Two days before I left for college, I had no idea that I was about to have an even more consequential day in the trajectory of my life, but on August 28, 1996, exactly that happened. Once again it was just me and my mom, attending one of our bandshell concerts and stumbling into the epic foursome that would become known as “The State Fair Girls”. There are few days in the history of my fetish as momentous as this one. Grade: A
1997–For the first year since 1993, my dad was back this year. All those years in the 90s I wasted with trucking through commercial exhibit buildings with my parents, attending bandshell concerts during the day, and leaving in the mid-to-late afternoon after only 7-8 hours at the fair….all during the era where teen smoking rates were at their highest since the late 70s. What a waste. This was the final year in which I didn’t have smoker sightings in mind as I journeyed through the fairgrounds, but even without paying attention I managed to score one passing sighting of a babe smoking in a cluster of hotties. Grade: D+
1998–I had worked at the post office this summer and although I hadn’t fully come to terms with my smoking fetish by the time the MNSF came around at summer’s end, it was the first state fair where I was consciously looking for pretty girls with cigarettes. So I had that part down…but I still hadn’t changed my ways, following in the folks’ shadows through the buildings and sitting at outdoor concerts during the day. I did pull off a handful of mediocre sightings, but chalk this up to another wasted year at the exact time when teen girl smoking rates hit their peak. Grade: C-
1999–On May 11, 1999, I discovered the smoking fetish websites online and spent the rest of the summer intensely searching for sightings in a way I never had before. This would be my first Minnesota State Fair with a confirmed smoking fetish. Yet once again, for a final year, I was in my parents’ shadow for most of the day. By mid-afternoon without any good sightings, I was feeling very disappointed…and straitjacketed. There had to be a ton of smoking going on the grounds but I just wasn’t in a position to see it, I kept telling myself. But I finally came up with the solution I should have came up with years earlier. At age 22, I finally told the folks I was gonna wander the grounds for the final hour by myself. In doing so, I saw a number of quality sightings, including a girl who remains in my top-50
MNSF sightings of all-time today. Needless to say, a monster was born…and the Minnesota State Fair would never be the same again. Grade: B-
2000–This was a year of transition for me in quite a few ways. It was a gloomy and cool day and I had to leave the fair early to go to a job interview. Not necessarily a recipe for a great day at the fair, but I nonetheless scored two of my top-10 MNSF sightings of all-time, including my #2 sighting ever, the best young girl sighting of my life. It was transitional because I still spent about 40% of my day with the parents either in the buildings or at outdoor bandshell concerts. No complaints this year as being with my parents facilitated both of my epic sightings of the day in their own way. Still, it was the end of an era for both the daytime bandshell concerts and me spending any time at all with my parents. The new millennium was gonna have an entirely new set of rules for the Minnesota State Fair. Grade: A-
2001–The transition put into place two years prior reached its completion in 2001, the first MNSF that would resemble my current state fair safaris. I separated from the folks early in the morning and navigated the grounds on my own terms. I also counted sightings that I accrued on the grounds for the first time and was actually surprised when the number exceeded 100. I had to wait until the dinner hour, but I managed to score two epic sightings that year. Also new to 2001 was the shift of the bandshell concerts from the daytime to the evening. Starting at 8:30 p.m. Ronnie Milsap took the stage. This was important because prior to 2001, my family had left the fairgrounds before dark every year. Being able to stick around after dark would bring about a new MNSF experience and a boatload of new sightings. And after all this, I would get home around midnight, log onto the computer, and find my one-month-old love interest Dana waiting for me online to hear all about my day at the fair and lamenting how she wished could have tagged along. Needless to say, another great day. Grade: A-
2002–I backslid a little this year from the previous year in a couple of ways. My mom had to work a few hours early in the morning so we took off late and didn’t even get to the fairgrounds until after 11, a good two hours later than normal. And there were no evening concerts and thus no grounds to stick around after dark, meaning we left at 7 p.m. once again. Nonetheless, I navigated the grounds on my own again the entire day and dedicated the eight hours I did have that day exclusively to sightings. How did they hold up? Mixed bag. If you check out my Chart 2, you’ll see that I only had a couple top-85 sightings that year and nothing in epic terrain. Numberswise, however, I still pulled off more than 100 sightings in those eight hours, which is a pretty good timeframe for that number of sightings, even though plenty of them were third-tier sightings of moderately attractive single mothers and the like. Not a bad day at the fair, but disappointing by MNSF standards. Grade: B-
2003–Another year of just my mom and I as my dad had to work. It was also another year of an evening bandshell concert which of course faciliated a longer day at the fair that lasted until well after 10 p.m. Again, I flew solo all day and dedicated the entire day to sightings. The numbers were strikingly consistent with the previous two years with just over 100 sightings, but this year I scored three sightings in the near-epic category that remain in my top-30 today and bested anything scored at the 2002 MNSF. I also scored my first blockbuster MNSF sighting during the evening hours, which set the stage for much more aggressive evening fetishing in the years to come. My best years were still ahead of me, but this was indeed a good one. Grade: B+
2004–A year very similar to the previous year in that it was again just my mom and I and we stuck around late for another evening concert. Numberswise, I broke a previous record with 109 total sightings, but that was just a few more than I had scored the three previous years. There was only one big difference between 2004 and previous years. The quality was astounding. Right away in the morning, I was scoring epic and blockbuster sightings, the best of which was my Swisher Sweet girl still in my top-10 today. The quality of the sightings held up over the course of the day and I managed five sightings that remain in my top-60 MNSF sightings. It was my most consistently satisfying sightings day at the MNSF thus far. Grade: A
2005–This was my 20th consecutive year at the Minnesota State Fair. I was unemployed and had nothing to do. And I had just had an epic local county fair with three of my best sightings of all-time. All this meant I was rarin’ to go and was more excited about the emerging Minnesota State Fair than I had ever been before, so much so that I made the first incarnation of my top-25 MNSF sightings list of all time in the days before the fair. So did it live up to the hype that year? Not really. It was my weakest Minnesota State Fair of the decade. I barely crossed the 100-sighting threshold and there were no truly blockbuster sightings, as evidenced by how few entries 2005 has in my top-85. It was still a more productive day than any of my 1990s safaris where I hung out with my parents all day and left by 5 p.m., but definitely the weakest from the 2000s, especially considering I was out on my own all day and stayed until 10:30 p.m. Grade: C+
2006–This was the year where things blew wide open. With one change to my formula, my number of total daily sightings nearly doubled. In recent years, there were evening bandshell concerts which sidelined me from about 8 p.m. to 10:30. For whatever reason, the quality of the concerts diminished badly starting this year, which meant my sightings numbers went off the hook. But even within the traditional timeframe of years prior, my past records were shattered and my old record of 109 sightings for the day was exceeded before 7 p.m. But the sightings just kept coming into the evening hours and I ultimately scored 165 sightings, which at the time seemed insurmountable. And beyond the quantity there was incredible quality to go along with it, with two sightings that remain in my top-15 of all-time and three additional entries in my top-85. I thought this stroke of good fortune was a fluke at the time, but in reality it was more a combination of staying longer hours and becoming more efficient in my navigation. The result was the first of a stretch of three sightings days at the Minnesota State Fair that were my all-time best. Grade: A+
2007–I was a little distracted heading into this MNSF safari on my 30th birthday. Any red-blooded male would be the day after a smoky date with my biggest high school crush Krissy. Nonetheless, I found my groove after a slow start and settled into a pattern almost identical to the previous year’s with blistering numbers of sightings and some top-shelf quality to boot. By my 7 p.m. meeting time with the folks, I had scored THREE epic sightings (all still among my top-20 MNSF sightings of all-time) and was already at 124 sightings on the day. Even though the evening hours didn’t deliver the way they had the previous year, I still bested the seemingly impassable 165 sightings I scored in 2006 by pulling in 184 in 2007. I might give a narrow edge to 2006 as the better of the two years because it was so unprecedented up to that point to be scoring the volume of quality sightings I was that day in 2006 while 2007 was an extension of that. Nonetheless, I raked in eight of my top-85 MNSF sightings in 2007. Not a bad way to celebrate my 30th birthday. Grade: A+
2008–Without a shadow of doubt, my best day ever of fetishing not only at the Minnesota State Fair, but of all-time. I have described in the past the trajectory of this day as a snowball that built momentum as it rolled downhill until it became a full-on avalanche. The first hour of the day was infuriatingly slow but things got rolling pretty well with a spattering of great sightings in the late morning and early afternoon. Things got better and better into the late afternoon and early evening, both in terms of quality and quantity. And by evening things were off the hook, so off the hook that the only reason I didn’t cross the 200-sighting threshold is because I was seeing so many sightings of incredible quality in those last two hours that I stuck around to inspect them in detail. Even at 10 p.m., after 13 hours of walking, I was operating on pure adrenaline and didn’t even really notice my intense foot pain as I usually do. I scored 192 total sightings including two epics that rank among my top-10of all-time, along with a total of nine entries in my top-85. It’s hard to imagine a scenario where I could have a better day of fetishing than this, but the Minnesota State Fair has delivered for me so strongly in the past that I’m not ruling anything out. Grade: A+
2009, Trip 1–I got a surprise second trip to the Minnesota State Fair in 2009. It was a good thing too because my first all-day trip was disappointing. It was a cool day to begin with, but by mid-afternoon the clouds rolled in and the wind picked up and things became downright unpleasant for a late August day. Beyond that, there were lengthy stretches in the morning and afternoon where sightings were simply nonexistent and where my mood was at times melancholy and bored in a way that’s very rare for MNSF trips. As the temps cooled in the late afternoon and the evening, sightings numbers did pick up. I was able to top the previous year’s record for sightings numbers and crossed the double-century threshold for the first time with 206 sightings, but had to sit for a good portion of the last two hours because of foot pain that came with arriving on the grounds an hour earlier than usual and stopping less frequently to admire epic sightings, which were fewer than years previous. I left with three sightings in my top-85 and expected my 2009 MNSF experience to be a bit of dud, until I scored a very unexpected half-day encore visit the following week. Grade: B-
2009, Trip 2–It was like being Superman, flying around the Earth to reverse time and recreate a day that had passed when my parents asked if I’d be interested in going to the Minnesota State Fair again on Labor Day weekend last year, if only for a half-day (my mom had to work the next morning so staying till after 10 wasn’t an option). It was a warm and sunny day and right off the bat I could tell that it was gonna be a much better day than the week before. Sightings came at a regular clip throughout the day and at no point was I bored or distracted the way I was the previous week. Several blockbusters occurred in this time frame, and the day ended with my only MNSF epic sighting of 2009. All in all, I scored 95 sightings during the half day, including an impressive six that made their way to my all-time top-85. Grade: A
2010, Trip 1—Despite being sick with a lingering head cold and getting by on less than two hours sleep the night before, I was ready to go at my first excursion to the Minnesota State Fair on a sticky 90-degree day that would be cut short at 7 p.m. since I would be attending my first evening bandshell concert in five years. The day was generally mediocre with a spattering of worthwhile sightings in the day’s early stages, but the final hour or so of fetishing made the trip worthwhile as I scored a bounty of blockbusters, and one monster epic that ended things on a high point leading into the concert. I was especially pleased knowing that only five days later I would be returning, this time for a full day of sightings bliss. Grade: B+
2010, Trip 2—My full day at the Minnesota State Fair started slowly in a number of ways. I was still a little bit sick. I was smarting from a would-be love interest telling me the night before she just wanted to be friends. The morning temperatures had dipped into the 40s and female fairgoers were decked out in jackets and jeans rather than tanktops and shorts. But the day would warm up to a comfortable mid-60s high that brought about a crowd of historic proportion to the fair that day, an all-time one-day record attendance that was almost too much in the afternoon hours. Sightings were hard to spot in these crowds and the ones I was seeing were generally marginal. The day was considerably below average. But then something crazy happened when nightfall came and the final three hours of the day would churn out one blockbuster/epic sighting after another, producing one of the best sightings nights of my life. The daytime crowds that proved too stifling would eventually produce the evening crowds that were just right in churning out the right demographics of smokers, and I was in the right place at the right time to see many of them. I ended up salvaging a modest day of fetishing about as impressively as possible. Grade: A-
2011, Trip 1–It isn’t often that a day at the Minnesota State Fair starts producing an endless litany of outstanding sightings before 2 p.m., but that’s exactly what I was experienced that day, particularly during the noon hour when I enjoyed one after another rock star sighting and was convinced I was on the cusp of one of my best days ever at the Minnesota State Fair. Unfortunately, the clouds rolled in at mid-afternoon and while it stayed dry, the clouds were a perfect metaphor for the wet blanket that was thrown on the day, as sightings became a lot more irregular and a lot less memorable in the second half of the afternoon. This dragged on into the evening, but in the final hour or so, I did go on a mini-roll and racked up a handful of quality sightings. Any time you get even a period of a day that delivers the way the early hours this day is a gift, but the slowdown in the second half of the day did keep the day from ranking up there with my best ever days of fetishing. Grade: B+
2011, Trip 2–The inverse of my first visit to the Minnesota State Fair in 2011, I sat in the passenger seat in horror on the drive up to the fairgrounds with rain coming down in buckets and no assurances that it was going to clear up for the rest of the day. After a late morning clearing when we got there, the rain came again around noon and I was starting to get very nervous. But by mid-afternoon the clouds broke and the sightings came fast and furious. While there were no genuine epics for the day, there was a steady stream of above-average material that lasted from about 3 p.m. through the evening hours till the time I left around 10:30, and you can’t ask for much more than that during a day of fetishing. Grade: A-
2012, Trip 1–My first trip to the Minnesota State Fair in 2012 happened to be on my 35th birthday, but it was hard to get too thrilled as the forecast was predicting rain my early afternoon and I was actually anticipating it would be an abbreviated day, and that I would return the next day for a complete day of fetishing. The rain did come around the noon hour, but it wasn’t as bad as expected and was actually a catalyst for a couple great sightings while taking shelter from the downpour. The downside of the rest of the day is that while the worst of the rain ended after about an hour, I was still planning on leaving early because the fairgrounds were a sloppy mess but by mid-afternoon decided to stick around. The uncertainty was a buzzkill on the day, and it didn’t help that the evening hours I wanted to stick around for ended up being below-average. With all that said, I had an above-average sightings haul with an ebb and flow pattern but which peaked in the late afternoon. It wasn’t one of my best sightings days by any stretch, but all things considered I stitched together a pretty good day of memorable encounters. Grade: B+
2012, Trip 2–My second day at the state fair this year was about perfectly on par with the first day in terms of substance, with a healthy haul of impressive sightings but no single sighting that burned up my world. But I’ll rate the second day a tick higher for a couple of reasons. First, the weather was perfect, and when you arrive at the fairgrounds on a sunny day when you know you won’t run into any weather issues, your morale is always higher and that’s very important. Secondly, I had a better evening haul on my second trip, and good evening sightings help wrap up a great day at the fair with a ribbon. Always nice to exit the grounds for the evening with a beaming smile on your face. Grade: B+
The consistency and history of the Minnesota State Fair as a sightings venue clearly rates it as my favorite place to fetish. Unfortunately, heading into 2013, the inevitable moment of reckoning has arrived as I read about the imposition of smoking restrictions at the Minnesota State Fair. Smokers will now be corraled into a series of smoking areas on the grounds, and while this has some potential upside, the loss of freedom to run into sightings anywhere on the ground is a massive net negative. Only time will tell if the new format completely ruins this sightings paradise for me, and I’ll be on pins and needles leading up to August to see.