Trevor’s Girlfriend Meets The Family

Trevor McPherson gingerly works the steering wheel and pedals of his dad’s car as he drives through the familiar suburban neighborhood approaching his home on a Friday evening in early October. He had just gotten his driver’s license a month ago and is still pretty nervous behind the wheel. A few short months earlier, he had no burning desire at all to get his driver’s license despite his 16th birthday approaching in August, but the girl a few feet to his right in the passenger seat changed that rather quickly in the later weeks of summer when he fast-tracked his way through driver’s ed. Trevor allowed himself to take his eyes off the road for a second to look at 15-year-old Lauren, a beautiful long-haired dark blond who could not have more perfectly personified the Midwestern girl next door. The nervous look on Lauren’s face matched her body language, as she repeatedly crosses and uncrosses her legs and takes copious and deeper drags than usual from her cigarette. Trevor is nervous too, but seeing that Lauren is far more nervous than him is just too adorable and an uncharacteristically smug smile lights up his face.

Lauren takes note of Trevor’s grin and a nervous smile emerges on her own face before saying, “You’re enjoying this just a little too much!” She pauses to take another nervous drag from her cigarette and then adds through a talking exhale “I’m soooo nervous about meeting your family!”

“Don’t worry, babe. They’ll love you,” Trevor smoothly reassures her. The look of youthful apprehension on Lauren’s face as she laments meeting his family at the end of their car ride takes him back to that night in late June when he first met Lauren at the swimming hole in northern Minnesota near where both of their families’ cabins were. A trigger was pushed inside Trevor on the smoky ride up to the cabin with his sisters that day and he decided to let go of his boyhood inhibitions. His first step was to approach the first pretty girl who tickled his fancy, particularly if she happened to be smoking a cigarette. As luck would have it, the very sweet and innocent mid-teen Lauren was sitting on the dock of the lake with her little brother and Trevor dug deep to extract every morsel of confidence he could muster and approached Lauren. It was the best decision he ever made as they connected immediately and hung out together in subsequent weekends at the cabin that summer.   They lived two suburbs apart in the Minneapolis-St. Paul area, so Trevor needed to get his driver’s license to reconnect with Lauren on a regular basis after summer ended, but everything fell into place and Trevor had never been happier in his 16 years than he was right now.

But it’s time for Trevor to take a big risk that he hopes will yield a huge reward. It’s time for Trevor to introduce Lauren to his family. Lauren has always been surprised that Trevor is so tolerant of her smoking but Trevor never broached the topic of his sexual attraction and since he and the conservative Lauren were a long way’s from being intimate, he never had any opportunity to convey it to her without it being awkward. Introducing Lauren to the family had the potential to stitch together some loose ends. It could finally earn him some respect from his family who means well but has always treated him as fairly invisible since he’s so quiet and unassuming…..but how could he be ignored after landing such a cute, intelligent, and well-mannered girlfriend? And being immersed in the smoking culture of his family could subtly send some cues Lauren’s way that might loosen her up in his presence. There is obviously the risk that Lauren could be freaked out by discerning that his interest in her is a proxy sexual fantasy that involved his mother and sisters, but it’s a risk Trevor is willing to take and knows that that revelation is inevitable anyway if he and Lauren go out long enough.

Lauren takes a final drag from her spent cigarette and deposits the butt out the cracked window which she also exhales through and then it finally hits her as she turns to Trevor with a terrified look on her face. “Oh shit!” she exclaims. “Now I’m gonna reek of smoke in front of your family!” apparently not even making the connection while nervously smoking her cigarette up to that point.

Trevor laughs at what would be a legitimate concern for most girls in this position, but quickly puts her mind at ease with a deliberate understatement, “Don’t worry. Most people in my family smoke so they won’t care.”

Immediately the fear vanishes off of Lauren’s face as she thinks for a second and adds, “Okay, good. Your clothes always smell like smoke so I figured somebody in your family must smoke.”

Trevor smiles back, not wanting to give away any clues for the merciless smoke assault Lauren is about to get in his house. He doesn’t know any details of the smoking situation in Lauren’s home other than both of her parents smoke and that she and her cousin engaged in an uncharacteristic (for Lauren) act of youthful rebellion by sneaking her parents’ cigarettes the summer before last. Trevor doesn’t know any girls of Lauren’s girl-next-door pedigree from his school who are smokers, and even with his upbringing surrounded by smokers, he is still kind of shocked that Lauren smokes. And the fascination with smoking that turned such a good girl into a smoker at age 14 is something he hoped would prove exploitable for the purposes of indulging his own smoking fetish. Tonight is gonna be the first test of that, and it’s about to happen as he turns into his parents’ driveway and parks the car. He looks to Lauren and she exhales nervously while making eye contact.

Ever the gentleman, Trevor steps out of the car and walks over to the passenger side, opens the door for Lauren who gives Trevor a nervous smile while preparing to exit the car. Distracted as Lauren is, Trevor takes the opportunity to admire her body as she rises to her feet in the driveway. Lauren dressed seasonally appropriate with a sweatshirt covering her blouse that didn’t do much for Trevor, but she delivered below the waist decked out in a skin-tight pair of black leggings. Trevor is always fascinated that girls in general and Lauren specifically consider these leggings to be fairly conservative attire as they leave absolutely nothing to the imagination of the leering male. Lauren looks to the front door as she gets out of the car, allowing Trevor to look down to her crotch. His heart skips a beat as the leggings tightly caress every curvature and every line of Lauren’s vagina that he has lusted for so heartily since that first night they met more than three months earlier. As she begins to walk towards the front door, he gets a chance to eyeball her ass which was also perfectly outlined in the leggings. He could stare at Lauren’s nubile body all night, but tonight he has a higher priority only a few feet ahead as they approach the front door of his parents’ house, and he is determined to make sure this night is a success.

Trevor opens the door and holds it open for Lauren to enter the house he grew up in. He looks at Lauren’s face to take in her reaction upon entering, and can tell Lauren is taken aback by the blue haze of smoke and the dominating smell of tobacco that hit her immediately. But neither Trevor nor Lauren have much time to react before Trevor’s mom Becky approaches the door to greet them, cigarette in hand just as Trevor suspected she would.

“Hello Lauren,” Becky warmly greets her with a surprisingly aggressive hug. “We’ve heard so much about you.” She pauses and Lauren thanks her before adding, “And I must say my son did very well for himself!”

The rest of the family approaches the entryway from the living room to see the mystery girl they had been hearing about for months. Becky introduces Lauren to them one by one, first Trevor’s dad Steve, and then sisters Courtney and Haylee who, just as Trevor suspected, were both holding cigarettes in hand as they exchange greetings. Trevor continues to read the body language, noticing Lauren looking at Courtney and Haylee smoking, and noticing that Courtney and Haylee seem very shocked at how impressive Lauren was considering their limited expectations of what the wallflower Trevor was capable of lassoing.

Lauren is welcomed into the living room where a five-year-old boy was sitting watching TV. Becky points his direction and says “Oh and this is Jarrod. Our daughter Haylee babysits him and his little brother. His brother is sleeping right now so if you don’t mind keep your voice down a little so he doesn’t wake up before dinner.”

Lauren mostly smiles and nods as the family members talk to her, answering questions with one-word responses and not giving away too much too early, and nobody including Trevor expected anything different given the obvious trepidation a 15-year-old girl would feel in this situation. Trevor makes a point of following Lauren’s eyes as she observes the family dynamics, and Lauren is paying particular attention to young Haylee who is nothing like Lauren had anticipated based on Trevor’s deliberately vague descriptions. He knew that the cute and feminine 14-year-old Haylee, decked out in her usual ensemble of pink tanktop and white shorts, must look so out of place to Lauren as she goes back to the couch where Jarrod is sitting watching his Disney movie on TV and sits right next to him with cigarette in hand. Trevor knows that both Jarrod and his brother Joshua’s parents are smokers, but he still wonders if they know the magnitude of the smoky environment that their sons experience in the McPherson home where Haylee babysits them. And he also wonders at this moment how far removed from Lauren’s household reality what is currently unfolding and what is inevitably yet to come will be. Despite growing up in a smoking household and being a smoker herself, Trevor is a little nervous that an evening with the heavy-smoking McPherson females will be far outside Lauren’s comfort zone.

Becky tells the young couple to not bother getting too comfortable because dinner would be ready in just a couple of minutes. The scenario is unfolding as Trevor had expected it would, with his mom and older sister Courtney asking Lauren the most inquisitive questions, all of which Trevor either already knows the answer to or wasn’t overly interested in. Trevor’s dad, temperamentally similar to Trevor in being pretty quiet and laid-back, gets a few questions in himself but mostly lets the ladies banter about. And Haylee, most likely a little shy around a girl her own age who happens to be her brother’s boyfriend, keeps her distance and shows the least interest in Trevor and his guest.

“Come and eat,” Becky announces to gather everybody at the kitchen table, including Haylee and Jarrod in the living room. “I hope Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes are to your liking,” Becky asks Lauren who responds approvingly. Trevor knows that this will be the true moment of revelation for how intense the smoking culture is in their home, and watches Lauren as she watches Becky, Courtney, and Haylee all bring cigarette packs and butt buckets to the kitchen table. Having had friends over for dinner in the past, Trevor is fairly confident that no “do you mind….?” inquiries will arise from anybody at the table regarding smoking at the dinner table. He doesn’t know how Lauren will respond anyway so he’s glad that his family is as clueless and selfish as ever in carrying on with their highly irregular smoking behaviors.

Lauren’s eyes get as large as saucers as she observes all three females arranging their tobacco paraphenelia in conjunction to the plates of food in front of them. Becky places her pack of Marlboro Reds on the other side of the plate from her silverware and the butt bucket similarly adjacent to her glass of milk. Courtney does the same with her butt bucket and pack of Marlboro Light Menthol 100s and Haylee with her Camel Pink No. 9s. All three ladies have still-smoldering cigarettes either poking out of their butt buckets or held between their fingers as they sit up at the table, all acting as if it’s perfectly normal behavior. In moments, forks and spoons start hitting the plates of the seven diners at the table with a haze of smoke still permeating. Trevor continues to sneak glances at Lauren to gauge her reaction, which is hard to fully discern, but he thinks it likely that Lauren has probably never experienced a situation like this in her life, particularly since most restaurants have been smoke-free over the course of her lifetime.

The conversation continues to ensue with most questions directed to Lauren but a few to Trevor. Trevor’s eyes dart back and forth from Lauren to whichever of the three other females at the table happen to be dragging from their cigarette while eating at the time. It doesn’t appear from Lauren’s reaction that she finds it completely repulsive, which is a relief to him. He had a feeling at the onset that Haylee’s legendary foul-mannered crudeness would fully put to the test Lauren’s tolerance, and he’s proven right as Haylee places her cigarette in her mouth while still chewing and takes an extended dangling drag towards the end of her Camel Pink. She crushes out the cigarette into the overflowing butt bucket and then shovels another forkful of potatoes into her mouth. Trevor watches in awe, wondering if Lauren is doing the same, as a blast of exhaled smoke exits Haylee’s nose as she chews, crashing into the plates full of food on table and spreading as it hits. Once Haylee swallows her potatoes, she crudely picks up her butt bucket and lets a juicy lugie dribble from her mouth onto the pile of cigarette butts. Trevor can see Jarrod has been watching this along with him, but is kind of hoping Lauren had missed that one. As he looks Lauren’s way and notices her immersed in conversation with Becky, he realizes she probably had.

But socially unacceptable dinnertime manners are hardly limited to Haylee at this kitchen table. The more refined Courtney would never resort to the kind of grossness that just came from Haylee, but she takes a couple of final drags from her Marlboro Light Menthol 100 in the moments ahead and follows through with her requisite “superexhales”, expelling massive volumes of straight-ahead smoke from which no one at the table was spared the stinky consequences. Courtney crushes out her cigarette and the diners are spared further asphyxiation at least for the immediate future, but Trevor knows it won’t last long.

As everybody finishes off their plate, Becky offers a strawberry-banana dessert which everybody gladly welcomes. Courtney and Haylee open up their respective packs of cigarettes and extract another one, lighting up just as Becky lights up a cigarette of her own while going to the refrigerator to break out the dessert. The questions keep coming and Lauren seems to be warming up to Trevor’s family pretty nicely as everybody eats dessert and Becky, Haylee, and Courtney smoke. Trevor keeps looking at Lauren hoping her comfort level is such that she will join in, and as she polishes off her dessert, Trevor’s wish comes true. After a night of clearly rising comfort and confidence, Lauren reverts briefly to the nervous meekness she walked in with as she looks straight at Becky and asks sheepishly, “Do you mind if I have a cigarette?”

For the first time since they arrived nearly an hour earlier, the room goes silent for a moment and every face at the table looks at Lauren with genuine surprise. Becky breaks the awkward silence and says in an unintentionally condescending voice, “Sure honey! You go right ahead! I had no idea you were a smoker.”

“Thanks,” Lauren responds gleefully, with obvious relief on her face both for the family’s acceptance and the prospect of sweet nicotine relief. She opens up her purse and pulls out her pack of Marlboro Lights 100s, and as she places the cigarette into her mouth and digs out her lighter, Trevor’s mom pleasantly surprises him with a request he didn’t even anticipate…

“Be a gentleman, Trevor, and light your girlfriend’s cigarette,” Becky advises.

Trevor thought he had prepared for every scenario that may have unfolded over the evening, but he was unprepared for him mom to so effortlessly present him with the golden opportunity he’s been waiting for since June. Lauren hands Trevor her lighter, and Trevor nervously approaches the end of the long all-white dangling from Lauren’s mouth with it. Trevor feels a rush of adrenaline bursting through his body as he flicks Lauren’s cigarette to life, but also feels a little on-the-spot knowing that everybody at the table is watching a moment he always hoped would be between Lauren and himself. Courtney pushes her butt bucket in Lauren’s direction so they can share it.

A brief conversation about Lauren’s smoking played out for a couple of minutes, revealing the information that Trevor already knew about how Lauren took up the habit a little over a year ago and that she smokes about a half pack a day. He is kind of hoping for a lengthy discussion about smoking to dominate the rest of the time at the table but the subject soon changes to their mutual family cabins up north in the Bemidji area. Trevor has plenty of time to observe the smoking habits of everybody at the table and this contrast really exposes the comparative shallowness of Lauren’s drags and exhales, particularly compared to Courtney whose gigantic smoke infernos were legendary. This comes as no surprise given that Lauren has only been smoking a year while the females in his family are all hardened tobacco veterans, but Trevor adores watching Lauren’s rookie stylings as she smokes with the “big girls”, his heart melting at the innocent way in which Lauren holds her cigarette with her bent elbow at the kitchen table and giggling at times with the lighthearted banter that continues.

The trajectory of the evening finally breaks with another turn of events that Trevor has long figured was coming. Courtney interjects to announce her departure. “Well much as I’d love to hang out with you fine people all night, my friends are expecting me so I better go see them.”

Courtney is a senior in high school now and for several months, Friday night has been her night to howl. Trevor figured she would break away at some point, and listens to his parents remind Courtney of her midnight curfew as she gets up from the table. Courtney gives passing acknowledgment of her parents’ rules as she gets up to walk towards the stairs where Trevor knows she will change clothes. He briefly watches her walk away in her conventional home comfort clothes of loose-fitting T-shirt and jeans, but he’s pretty sure that when she comes back downstairs she’ll be wearing something a lot sexier.

The conversation at the table presses forward for the next 10 minutes or so, all three remaining gals having finished their after-supper cigarettes and leaving Trevor briefly bored, yet anticipating his older sister’s return. A mild commotion ensues from upstairs and Trevor can hear the beginning of a descent down those stairs followed by the mildly loud and aggravated voice of his sister asking those downstairs if they know where her purse is. In seconds, Courtney is downstairs and approaching the table again, and Trevor could not have been more pleased with her wardrobe selection. She is wearing a very revealing, low-cut, bare-midriffed white blouse covered by a stylish unzipped black leather jacket…..and a skin-tight pair of black leather pants below the waist. Courtney has kept her hair its natural blond that fall rather than dye it dark brown as she usually does after summer, and Trevor has never seen his sister look sexier, particularly with a freshly lit all-white Marlboro Light Menthol 100 dangling from her lips as she approaches.

Trevor looks Lauren’s way, hoping she’s noticing what he is and noticing how sexy Courtney looks in that black leather. While Trevor’s primary agenda for the evening has been to normalize and promote smoking to Lauren based on exposure to his unorthodox family, he also has been hoping for Lauren to see Courtney heading out for a Friday night with her friends wearing the exact sort of thing she is wearing to promote the conservative Lauren to expand her wardrobe. It is perhaps a longshot, but Lauren gives Courtney the exact response he wants to hear when she tells Courtney “you look really good in that!”

Courtney thanks Lauren but is still distracted looking for her purse. Her father points to a table on the outskirts of the kitchen where he spots her purse and points her in that direction. “Thanks daddy”, Courtney says, approaching her nonsmoking dad with that long cigarette still dangling from her lips and immerses him in a very aggressive hug, temporarily making Trevor jealous, and then removes the cigarette briefly from her lips and taps the ash into the nearest butt bucket. The cigarette goes right back into her mouth and she picks up the purse and approaches the door to leave for the night, but before she leaves she tells Lauren how nice it was to meet her and gives Trevor an admiring look, adding “don’t let this one slip away, little brother!”, winking at him as she walks away. Trevor feels on top of the world and can never remember a time when either of his sisters expressed their pride or admiration for him. He gives one final admiring glance at Courtney’s leather-draped ass as she walks out the door, wondering at this point what else the night had in store for him, convincing himself the night had to have peaked.

He was gonna get his answer in just a couple of moments, seconds after Haylee lights another Camel Pink No. 9. The screams of a long-sleeping and forgotten infant emerge from the nearest bedroom. It is Joshua, Jarrod’s 18-month-old baby brother. The timing is perfect as Haylee leaves the room and Becky asks Trevor and Lauren if they’d like to stick around or head on out and have some fun. Trevor leaves it up to Lauren and is relieved when Lauren says she’s having fun here and would be happy to stay a couple more hours, even though they’d have nothing more exciting to do than watch Jarrod’s Disney movies. Trevor knows that at least for him, there would be far more entertaining things going on in that living room tonight than what’s on TV.

Haylee delivers on that expectation in mere moments, carrying a crying Jarrod into the living room, cigarette dangling from her lips, and approaches the coffee table near where Joshua’s diapers are kept. She sets the baby boy up on the countertop with fresh diaper in hand, getting ready to do what Trevor knows to be Haylee’s least favorite part of her babysitting job. She lays out young Joshua on the countertop that represented the dividing line where the living room turned into the kitchen, and Trevor quietly celebrates as his positioning is perfect to watch this out of the corner of his eye with little risk of Lauren, seated to his right, noticing. Haylee unfastens Joshua’s diaper and attends to him, carrying out one of her vintage dangling drags while doing so, smoke sloppily spilling out of her face and gravitating into the airspace of the infant boy. At one point she leans forward while replacing the soiled diaper with the replacement, the cherry of her dangling cigarette mere inches in front of the baby boy’s face.

Trevor is awestruck observing his kid sister’s clueless and incredibly inappropriate display, wondering if the boys’ parents would remove them from the McPherson home immediately if they had any idea how their babysitter operated. And Trevor cannot help but notice the long ash at the end of Haylee’s cigarette and wonders how long it’s gonna hang on. As Haylee calmly speaks to Joshua through a talking dangle trying to settle down the crying infant, Trevor gets his answer. A long granny ash falls from Haylee’s cigarette, and even though Trevor doesn’t see where it falls, it looks to have dropped right onto the boy’s midsection. Trevor watches as Haylee places her hand near the boy’s penis and flicks the ash off of his skin and inside the otherwise clean diaper before fastening the diaper and lifting Joshua off the table. My sisters need quit finding ways to grow my smoking fetish, Trevor thinks to himself as Haylee lifts Joshua into her arms, cigarette still dangling from her lips and a dirty diaper in her free hand.

Haylee disappears into the kitchen to dispose of the diaper but returns in a few seconds, sitting on the couch adjacent to the loveseat that Trevor and Lauren are seated on, sitting right next to Jarrod with Joshua on her lap. At this point Lauren is observing as well, making goo-goo faces at young Joshua that goes along with Haylee’s baby talk. It’s the first time the two teen girls had bonded in any way since Lauren’s arrival and Trevor hopes their mutual bashfulness is on the wane. The girls have a brief exchange about the boys and how long Haylee has been babysitting, but it remains awkward and Trevor can’t help but notice Lauren looking at the close proximity of Haylee’s cigarette to both of the boys. He hopes Lauren doesn’t say anything, and ultimately breathes a sigh of relief when Lauren instead breaks out her Marlboro Lights 100s pack and he lights up another one for her, determining that Lauren’s comfort level in this free-smoking household is increasing.

The family quietly watches the Disney movies for the next hour or so. Nothing on the screen held Trevor’s interest too closely but the people watching the screen sure did. Most fascinating was Haylee who smokes her Camel Pink No. 9s at her usual significant clip with two very young boys in her immediate presence, either dangling the cigarette from the corner of her mouth or holding it to her right out of Joshua’s reach. Either way, her sloppy exhales often blast Joshua directly in the face while her sidestream smoke flow straight into the respiratory system of Jarrod sitting next to her. Jarrod frequently coughs and rubs his irritated eyes, and Trevor sits there fascinated that Haylee is too oblivious to even notice. He also notices both boys have as hard of time taking their eyes off of Haylee as he does, and he recognizes the significant likelihood that the young boys’ childhood babysitter is setting the early ideal for their sexual preferences. While Trevor has vague memories of his mom’s heavy smoking providing the origins of his smoking fetish, he can only imagine how bad these boys will have it as his mom was not a shapely 14-year-old girl in a pink tanktop and white shorts when he was their age.

And while Trevor’s observations early on during the course of the movie viewing is more directed towards sister Haylee, girlfriend Lauren ultimately demands to be noticed, and as the next hour plays out, Trevor begins to notice less-than-subtle signals from Lauren that the evening has had an effect on her. Only about 15 minutes after finishing her first cigarette, Trevor is surprised as Lauren tugs on his arm and hands him her lighter to spark up another cigarette. Lauren has always been a light smoker and she’s already smoked more tonight than she has any other night they’ve been together. And he can’t help but notice the look in her eyes after he sparks up that next cigarette, a playful and inviting look that Lauren follows up by cuddling next to Trevor and lying her head on his shoulder. Trevor puts her arm around her and is overjoyed that Lauren is comfortable enough around his family to make her first physical overture towards him beyond the hand-holding and goodnight smooches that represented as far as the two had gone up to this point.

Three months ago, or really even three hours ago, Trevor could never have imagined cuddling with a girl in front of his family, yet here he sits, bearing the brunt of Lauren’s exhaled cigarette smoke more closely than ever before and feeling her body expand and contract as she took her drags with his arm pressed around her shoulder. Trevor always enjoys when Lauren smokes a cigarette, but this was the best smoking experience he’s ever had with her and he’s briefly disappointed when Lauren crushes out her cigarette in the butt bucket Courtney left behind.

But the evening takes another unexpected turn seconds later when dad looks up and asks who wants ice cream sundaes. “I do!”, shouts Jarrod the loudest, but with Lauren, Courtney, and Trevor all nodding that that sounds good to them as well.

Becky then looks to Steve and says she doesn’t think they have any toppings at home, merely the vanilla ice cream. Steve then offers to go to the store and pick them up, but Trevor instinctively takes advantage of an opening he just knows will produce dividends for him. “I can go get it!” Trevor offers. “I need the driving practice anyway,” he adds, taking it further than needed to sell his point but nonetheless accomplishing his end as Steve nods that that will be fine.

Trevor looks briefly at his girlfriend next to him, who is still glowing, and cooperates as he hoped and chimes in, “I’ll go with!”

Lauren stands up as Trevor approaches his dad for the car keys.   Trevor’s dad gives him an “I-know-what-you’re-up-to” grin as he hands him the keys followed by a stealth thumbs-up to his son that probably wasn’t meant for mom’s eyes. Am I that obvious, Trevor thinks to himself as he turns to Lauren and they walk towards the door.   Trevor is just dying to hear Lauren’s thoughts on his family as he opens the car door for her and they make the short eight-block drive to the nearest grocery store.

Lauren wastes no time broaching the exact topic that Trevor hoped for, lightheartedly saying “You weren’t kidding when you said there are a lot of smokers in your family!”

Trevor laughs and adds, “See I told you that you didn’t have anything to worry about with my family.”

“Yeah they are really great. I liked everybody a lot. They’re so easy to talk to.” After a brief pause she continues, “I kind of feel sorry for those little boys though,” Lauren adds but with a tone that assures Trevor she isn’t too upset about what she just saw. “Haylee really smokes a lot around them. As much as my little brother hates my smoking, I can’t imagine smoking that much around him.”

“I guess I’m used to it because they’ve always smoked around me,” Trevor responds, taken aback once again as Lauren leans towards him and shows physical affection by rubbing her hands on his shoulder. They continue to chat on the drive to the store and Lauren keeps throwing lovey-dovey looks his way, a look he hasn’t seen from her before. As he arrives at the store, he instinctively parks his car in a fairly remote spot near the back of the lot, having a feeling that when they get back outside he just might want a little privacy.

Trevor opens the door for Lauren, who greets him with an unusually bubbly and flirtatious “thank you sir!” before approaching the store’s entrance with him and reinforcing his impression that something different was going on with Lauren tonight. He puts his arm around her waist as they walk, taking some initiative for physical content that both of them had shied away from up to this point. As they get inside, Trevor picks up a small basket for the few ice cream sundae supplies they need and Lauren wraps her arms around Trevor’s, walking arm in arm in a public display of affection that seemed so out of character for the shy Lauren. Who is this girl and what she done with Lauren Nelson, Trevor finds himself thinking.  On they press, arm in arm from aisle to aisle, picking up walnuts, chocolate and butterscotch sauce, whipped cream, and maraschino cherries.

After paying for their ice cream toppings and exiting the store, Lauren and Trevor make the long walk to Trevor’s dad’s car in the back of the parking lot but as Trevor opens the passenger door for Lauren to get in, she doesn’t let go of his hand and a mischievous look appears on her face. “Have a seat first, my good sir”, she adds.

Trevor cannot believe how frisky Lauren is but plans to play it out as far as she’ll let it go, sitting down in the passenger seat with Lauren quickly sitting on his lap and closing the door. The young couple is snugly seated in the compressed space and Trevor takes the opportunity to put his hand on the side of Lauren’s ass, gently caressing it as she reaches for her purse and extracts her pack of Marlboro Lights 100s. She places an unlit cigarette into her mouth and says through a talking dangle, “Be a gentleman, Trevor. Light your girlfriend’s cigarette,” playfully mocking Becky’s husky voice from earlier and then cutting loose a girlish giggle in sharp contrast.

Trevor laughs himself and then lights her cigarette and Lauren takes one of the deepest drags he’s seen from her. Lauren exhales straight into Trevor’s face and Trevor realizes that Lauren is onto him. He doesn’t know how to respond and wants to avoid an awkward conversation about his smoking fetish so instead tells Lauren how beautiful she is as she takes another drag and again exhales into his face. Lauren bites her lower lip and the look on her face drifts from merely frisky to come-hither, but Trevor only gets a moment to admire that look before she aggressively approaches him and presses her lips to his.

Trevor takes it in and enjoys his first open-mouth kiss with the girl he had been fantasizing about for the last three months. After all these years of wondering what a kiss from a smoker would taste like, Trevor is finding out as Lauren taps into a level of passion he didn’t know existed in her as he savors her tobacco-laced breath, their tongues slipping in and out of each other’s mouths for a good 60 seconds before they split apart.

“You’re a good kisser!” Lauren says, taking another drag from her still-burning cigarette and exhaling into Trevor’s face once again. Trevor can barely muster a word staring back at Lauren, aghast at just how correct his instincts were that Lauren’s out-of-character appeal to smoking was a vein that, if tapped into properly, could release a tiger. That tiger is out of her cage tonight as Lauren proceeds to kiss Trevor’s ear and neck, providing him a different perspective of her smoky odor as she moves her face while doting affection on him. She takes another drag from her cigarette and they make out again, Trevor’s senses running at full-throttle capacity as his teenage girlfriend thrusts her ashtray mouth directly into his while holding her burning cigarette over his shoulder, not close enough to burn him, but close enough for the smoke to drift towards him as he breathed and enhancing the sensual experience even more.

After a good three minutes of making out, they break apart again, and Trevor notices an even deeper level of mischief on Lauren’s face. As she takes another drag from her cigarette, she unzips her sweater and tosses it to the backseat. Trevor has little experience with girls, but he knows exactly how to respond to this gesture. Lauren’s red blouse wasn’t particularly low cut but he nonetheless places his hand on the blouse above the cleavage and pulls it down, touching her boobs for the first time and then lowering his face down to caress them with his lips. The constrictive blouse and her bra keep him from getting the level of access he was hoping for, but Trevor is still able to wrap his lips around both of Lauren’s breasts and inside her cleavage. She offers subtle moans of pleasure to encourage him and he gets even more encouragement by the feeling of her chest expanding as she takes another drag from her cigarette, followed by the odor of fresh smoke when she exhales.

Trevor is getting greedy at this point and tests Lauren by placing his hand on her crotch outside of her leggings, rubbing his fingers on her pussy to see how she responds while continuing to kiss her breasts. When he gets no resistance, he takes the opportunity to find her waistline with his hand and ventures down her leggings and her panties, proceeding inch by inch towards her privates dreading that Lauren’s disapproving hand would put a stop towards his own hand’s exploratory descent into parts unknown. He feels the stubble of her pubic hairs and congratulates himself for touching his first vagina before beginning to caress her girly parts with a rising level of aggressiveness. He has no idea what he’s doing down there, but Lauren’s increasingly passionate moans let him know he’s doing something right. He’s thinking to himself how crazy it is that having barely been to what he would consider first base with Lauren or any other girl up until now, he had rounded first base, kept running to second, and is turning to third base with a solid stand-up triple on one night. Lauren begins to bark instructions to Trevor to move his hand towards her sweet spot, and Trevor becomes humbled a bit and her instructions keep coming and he’s unable to locate the spot she wants him to find. As she says “ouch!” at one point, Trevor decides it’s time to quit while he’s ahead, removing his hand from her pants and removing his face from her boobs to look at her. The look of passion and pleasure is as strong as ever and she playfully adds, “If I had known this would happen, I definitely would have shaved down there last night.”

They begin to make out again, her breath tasting smokier than ever after having consumed most of her cigarette at this point.  When they break apart this time, Lauren takes a final drag from her cigarette and tosses the butt out the cracked window before crashing her head into Trevor’s chest. She reeks of smoke at this point, pressed so tightly to him, and Trevor remains very turned on, sensing that she is as well. “You want to do anything else,” Trevor asks after a couple of minutes of comfortable and relaxed silence.

Lauren pauses a bit before responding, “I’d love to but it probably isn’t a good idea since we’re heading back to your parents place.”

Trevor almost completely forgot about the fact that they were heading back to his folks’ place with ice cream toppings, but agreed that they should head home, opening the door to let Lauren climb out before circling the car to get into the driver’s seat himself, the evening having gone more spectacularly than he could ever have imagined. He starts the car and prepares to drive away, but Lauren leans toward him with another come-hither look in her eyes, taking him more off guard than at any other point that night with the question, “So how big is it?”

Trevor is at a complete loss for words before finally coming around to responding with “you’ll just have to see”.

Lauren wastes no time doing so, unbuckling the top buckle off of his jeans and venturing down his shorts with her hand to touch Trevor’s now fully erect cock. Trevor can tell that this is the first dick Lauren has ever touched and she explores it thoroughly with her fingers, a bubbly smile emerging on her face as she strokes his manhood. Trevor adores the feeling of having his dick stroked by the most important girl in his life and briefly entertains the thought that she won’t be satisfied by merely touching it. He doesn’t have much time to dwell on that thought before she reads his mind and begins to unzip his fly with her free hand. She gives Trevor an approving look before working his unit through the hole in his shorts and then through the fly of his jeans, admiring it for a moment before climbing on top of her passenger seat, trying to figure out a way to give head with the inconvenient console separating her seat from his.

She ventures ahead, getting on her knees at the edge of the passenger seat and lowering her face to his crotch, filling her mouth with his manhood and taking an extended suck before working it with oral thrusting motions that provide Trevor accelerating levels of physical pleasure the likes of which he could never have imagined. How incredibly far I have come since last summer, Trevor thinks to himself while watching and feeling Lauren’s sexually charged assault of the most private parts of his body. He looks to her lower body, her ass up in the window for anybody to see if they weren’t parked in such a remote spot and at such a late hour. He briefly pontificates on how vulnerable of a position Lauren is in, leaning over the console in the car and thrusting herself down into his lap, but as he feels the jagged edge of Lauren’s teeth sharply press against his hard dick, he quickly changes his mind and recognizes that he’s the one in the really vulnerable position here, at the mercy of this horny teenage girl fellating on him and capable of inflicting incomprehensible pain with one “false move”.

He lets this thought pass quickly though as he realizes he’s about to discharge. He warns her that it’s coming and asks if she wants to taste it. She vigorously nods in the affirmative and in seconds his male fluids explode into her mouth. He’s curious if she will gag and find it gross, but she gulps it up as quickly as possible, seconds before lifting her head from his crotch and making eye contact for the first time in a few minutes while using her hand to wipe her mouth. She leans back in the seat and both of them take a moment to catch their breath, continuing to make lovey-dovey eyes at each other.

Trevor asks if she’d like him to return the favor, but realizes they’re both really out on a limb at this point. Lauren obviously does as well and responds, “No silly. If you went back to your parents place with me all over your face I am pretty sure your parents would figure it out.” Lauren giggles and Trevor has to agree, but after a brief awkward pause, Lauren adds, “Maybe next Friday night you can return the favor though”, giving him a toothy smile and then reaching into her purse for yet another cigarette which she beckons Trevor to light. The very possibility that the next Friday night—or any future Friday night–could be in the same league as tonight hadn’t crossed Trevor’s mind until now, but at this point all bets were off as his reserved girlfriend of four hours earlier has taken the bait he set out for her and swallowed it whole—literally!

Trevor and Lauren drive home from there, and while Jarrod asks “What took you guys so long?!??!” Haylee, Steve, and Becky feel no need to ask as they figure some kind of hanky-panky transpired and have no interest in finding out details about it. Trevor and Lauren’s body language as they prepare their ice cream sundaes speak volumes, particularly to Trevor’s parents who grow increasingly concerned with ongoing observations that these two got a little too frisky on their drive to the grocery store. Everybody sits down to watch Disney videos and eat their ice cream sundaes soon after, and Lauren and Trevor both make eyes at each other thinking the same thing as they place the maraschino cherries that top their sundaes and rip the stem apart from the cherries inside their teeth. They both know they will be popping more cherries in the very near future.

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Has Scarcity of Sightings Enhanced Your Smoking Fetish?

I’m 36 years old and have had some level of sexual association with female smoking going back to my earliest memories of childhood, actively fantasizing about it as young as first grade.  My fetish grew with me into adolescence and young adulthood, but didn’t come out of the closet until 1999 when I discovered these boards.  That was, of course, the end of an era for public smoking, but also the end of taking for granted the presence of sightings.  And in the year 2014, I have to admit that the scarcity of sightings today has enhanced the optical pleasures I take away from the sightings I do get.

Now, granted, part of this stems from my age and timeline coming to terms with my fetish, but I can’t help but think that even if I was 20 years older, the widespread prevalence of smoking a generation ago would have made it less of a big deal to me.  Without question, I would still have had a fetish for it if I graduated high school in 1981 instead of 1996, but would my attention to detail and raw psychological fascination in young female smokers have ever reached the point it is today if not for the “rare treat” aspect of modern sightings?  I tend to think not.

Now this is not to say I wouldn’t go back to the smoking culture of the 70s and 80s in a heartbeat if given the chance.  But if I’m forced to acknowledge an upside to the current era of declining tobacco prevalence, it’s that the sightings I do get are so much more satisfying.  I take this into account on my blog as well when I’m reconfiguring lists of all-time favorites.  Sightings that would have been “merely great” if I had stumbled into them 15 years ago get bonus points for occurring in the modern era, simply because the likelihood of these kinds of sightings occurring today is so limited.

Take my three favorite fairgrounds sightings from 2013 for example.  One of them was an 18ish brunette who lit her first cigarette 30 seconds after entering the fair gates on a day designated as “smoke-free” at my county fair.  I saw her two more times that night at the fair and she was smoking both times, and then three more times on subsequent evenings, and she was smoking every time.  While she would have been an incredible sighting 20 years ago, the context of a girl like this existing in 2013, smoking so heavily with cigarettes selling for $7.50 a pack in Minnesota and flagrantly violating the fairgrounds’ ban on smoking, made her that much more memorable and worthy of Hall of Fame status.

Another of last year’s Big Three, also at my county fair, put on a smorgasbord of trigger-tripping fetish behavior that I had a front-row seat for, being the only smoker in her group, posing for group photos openly advertising her cigarette in them, making out with her nonsmoking boyfriend with fresh tobacco breath, and smoking while eating fair food in her tight huddle of friends standing amidst her haze of secondhand smoke.  Again, a sighting like this would always have been incredible, but it wouldn’t have seemed so otherworldly exotic in 1993 when smoking was normalized than it did in 2013 with smoking so denormalized in “polite society”.

And lastly, I described last year’s Minnesota State Fair sighting involving a mother and 13ish blond daughter smoking in the presence of the nonsmoking husband/father as “the kind of sighting I thought existed only in the past….the kind of sighting I never thought I’d see again”.  Even though the daughter’s smoking show lasted all of four drags, the fact that I witnessed something like this in 2013 elevated it to the upper reaches of my all-time greatest sightings list, without doubt several positions higher than it would have if I had witnessed the same dynamic play out 25 years ago when I was closer to the daughter’s age.

Am I alone here?  Are sightings more satisfying for all the fetishers here today than a generation ago?  Do you find yourself studying the detail of gals’ smoking style more closely in those rare opportunities that you get a front-row seat to a sighting than you did when so many more women were publicly smoking in the past?  And are you more admiring of the girls who still deliver first-rate sightings now simply because of the magnitude of their rebellion in the face of a hostile culture?  For me it’s all the all of the above, and for as long as a day or evening of fetishing is still capable of producing an adrenaline-charging sighting like any of the three I cited above, I will continue going out of my way to put myself in situations where such sightings can materialize.

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Minnesota State Fair Overview

The Minnesota State Fair is my favorite sightings venue of the year.  It has been delivering for me consistently since I was a boy and has been the source of a long list of my best sightings of all-time.  Going back to 1993, I have scored 2,882 sightings at the Minnesota State Fair.  The list has become so long that I’ve written my own shorthand version of a top-300 sightings of all-time from the MNSF.  And even that list only represents about 12% of total sightings over the last 20 years.  From there I’ve narrowed it down to a top-100 list…

Below I will make two separate lists.  The first is the total number of sightings I scored each year at the Minnesota State Fair since I started keeping count.  The second is a numerical breakdown of my top-100 sightings year by year.  It’s not easy to explain but hopefully it’ll make since when you see the chart….

Chart 1

1993–2 sightings
2009, Trip 1–206
2009, Trip 2—95
2010, Trip 1—117
2010, Trip 2—212

2011, Trip 1–194

2011, Trip 2–203

2012, Trip 1–186

2012, Trip 2–199

2013, Trip 1–180

2013, Trip 2–196

Some more specifics about the figures in Chart 1 below.  But first Chart 2, the distribution of my top-85 sightings year-to-year….

Chart 2

2000–2, 12, 75
2001–8, 16
2002–48, 74
2003–20, 28, 32
2004–7, 19, 40, 46, 62
2005–42, 82
2006–4, 13, 21, 41, 88, 99
2007–9, 17, 18, 33, 68, 87, 91, 94
2008–3, 6, 23, 29, 34, 51, 83, 90, 93
2009, Trip 1–30, 49, 92, 100
2009, Trip 2–14, 36, 63, 71, 77, 89
2010, Trip 1—10, 35, 64, 70, 84
2010, Trip 2—5, 43, 53, 56, 79

2011 , Trip 1–15, 47, 55, 59, 72, 95

2011, Trip 2–22, 25, 52, 57, 69, 78, 80

2012, Trip 1–26, 37, 44, 85, 96

2012, Trip 2–24, 38, 50, 60, 65, 81, 97

2013, Trip 1–27, 39, 58, 61, 73, 86

2013, Trip 2–11, 45, 66, 67, 98

Now I’ll do a brief year-to-year synopsis to accompany the charts….

1993–The year I finally broke through with my first memorable sighting after eight years of attending the Minnesota State Fair with a bourgeoning but still undefined smoking fetish.  I had just turned 16 a couple days before my first consequential MNSF sighting transpired, and I couldn’t have asked for a better “sweet 16″ gift.  Grade:  B+

1994–It was just my mom and I this year as my dad had to work.  Sightings of smokers were not on my mind and I spent much of my day at free country music concerts in the bandshell.  This was the only year of the last 18 where I didn’t score a single memorable sighting. Grade: Incomplete

1995–Another year of just my mom and I.  Pretty much a carbon copy of the year before except for one significant development…..a vintage sighting of a hot blonde near the sandcastles that remains in my top-100 of all-time 16 years later.  I had just turned 18 and on my continued slow road to having a defined smoking fetish.  This sighting was one more stepping stone on that road.  Grade:  B

1996–Two days before I left for college, I had no idea that I was about to have an even more consequential day in the trajectory of my life, but on August 28, 1996, exactly that happened.  Once again it was just me and my mom, attending one of our bandshell concerts and stumbling into the epic foursome that would become known as “The State Fair Girls”.  There are few days in the history of my fetish as momentous as this one.  Grade:  A

1997–For the first year since 1993, my dad was back this year.  All those years in the 90s I wasted with trucking through commercial exhibit buildings with my parents, attending bandshell concerts during the day, and leaving in the mid-to-late afternoon after only 7-8 hours at the fair….all during the era where teen smoking rates were at their highest since the late 70s.  What a waste.  This was the final year in which I didn’t have smoker sightings in mind as I journeyed through the fairgrounds, but even without paying attention I managed to score one passing sighting of a babe smoking in a cluster of hotties.  Grade:  D+

1998–I had worked at the post office this summer and although I hadn’t fully come to terms with my smoking fetish by the time the MNSF came around at summer’s end, it was the first state fair where I was consciously looking for pretty girls with cigarettes.  So I had that part down…but I still hadn’t changed my ways, following in the folks’ shadows through the buildings and sitting at outdoor concerts during the day.  I did pull off a handful of mediocre sightings, but chalk this up to another wasted year at the exact time when teen girl smoking rates hit their peak.  Grade:  C-

1999–On May 11, 1999, I discovered the smoking fetish websites online and spent the rest of the summer intensely searching for sightings in a way I never had before.  This would be my first Minnesota State Fair with a confirmed smoking fetish.  Yet once again, for a final year, I was in my parents’ shadow for most of the day.  By mid-afternoon without any good sightings, I was feeling very disappointed…and straitjacketed.  There had to be a ton of smoking going on the grounds but I just wasn’t in a position to see it, I kept telling myself.  But I finally came up with the solution I should have came up with years earlier.  At age 22, I finally told the folks I was gonna wander the grounds for the final hour by myself.  In doing so, I saw a number of quality sightings, including a girl who remains in my top-50
MNSF sightings of all-time today. Needless to say, a monster was born…and the Minnesota State Fair would never be the same again.   Grade:  B-

2000–This was a year of transition for me in quite a few ways.  It was a gloomy and cool day and I had to leave the fair early to go to a job interview.  Not necessarily a recipe for a great day at the fair, but I nonetheless scored two of my top-15 MNSF sightings of all-time, including my #2 sighting ever, the best young girl sighting of my life.  It was transitional because I still spent about 40% of my day with the parents either in the buildings or at outdoor bandshell concerts.  No complaints this year as being with my parents facilitated both of my epic sightings of the day in their own way.  Still, it was the end of an era for both the daytime bandshell concerts and me spending any time at all with my parents.  The new millennium was gonna have an entirely new set of rules for the Minnesota State Fair.  Grade: A-

2001–The transition put into place two years prior reached its completion in 2001, the first MNSF that would resemble my current state fair safaris.  I separated from the folks early in the morning and navigated the grounds on my own terms.  I also counted sightings that I accrued on the grounds for the first time and was actually surprised when the number exceeded 100.  I had to wait until the dinner hour, but I managed to score two epic sightings that year.  Also new to 2001 was the shift of the bandshell concerts from the daytime to the evening. Starting at 8:30 p.m. Ronnie Milsap took the stage.  This was important because prior to 2001, my family had left the fairgrounds before dark every year.  Being able to stick around after dark would bring about a new MNSF experience and a boatload of new sightings.  And after all this, I would get home around midnight, log onto the computer, and find my one-month-old love interest Dana waiting for me online to hear all about my day at the fair and lamenting how she wished could have tagged along.  Needless to say, another great day.  Grade: A-

2002–I backslid a little this year from the previous year in a couple of ways.  My mom had to work a few hours early in the morning so we took off late and didn’t even get to the fairgrounds until after 11, a good two hours later than normal.  And there were no evening concerts and thus no grounds to stick around after dark, meaning we left at 7 p.m. once again.  Nonetheless, I navigated the grounds on my own again the entire day and dedicated the eight hours I did have that day exclusively to sightings.  How did they hold up?  Mixed bag.  If you check out my Chart 2, you’ll see that I only had a couple top-100 sightings that year and nothing in epic terrain.  Numberswise, however, I still pulled off more than 100 sightings in those eight hours, which is a pretty good timeframe for that number of sightings, even though plenty of them were third-tier sightings of moderately attractive single mothers and the like.  Not a bad day at the fair, but disappointing by MNSF standards.  Grade:  B-

2003–Another year of just my mom and I as my dad had to work.  It was also another year of an evening bandshell concert which of course faciliated a longer day at the fair that lasted until well after 10 p.m. Again, I flew solo all day and dedicated the entire day to sightings. The numbers were strikingly consistent with the previous two years with just over 100 sightings, but this year I scored three sightings in the near-epic category that remain in my top-40 today and bested anything scored at the 2002 MNSF.  I also scored my first blockbuster MNSF sighting during the evening hours, which set the stage for much more aggressive evening fetishing in the years to come.  My best years were still ahead of me, but this was indeed a good one.  Grade:  B+

2004–A year very similar to the previous year in that it was again just my mom and I and we stuck around late for another evening concert.  Numberswise, I broke a previous record with 109 total sightings, but that was just a few more than I had scored the three previous years. There was only one big difference between 2004 and previous years.  The quality was astounding.  Right away in the morning, I was scoring epic and blockbuster sightings, the best of which was my Swisher Sweet girl still in my top-10 today.  The quality of the sightings held up over the course of the day and I managed five sightings that remain in my top-60 MNSF sightings. It was my most consistently satisfying sightings day at the MNSF thus far.  Grade:  A

2005–This was my 20th consecutive year at the Minnesota State Fair.   I was unemployed and had nothing to do.  And I had just had an epic local county fair with three of my best sightings of all-time.  All this meant I was rarin’ to go and was more excited about the emerging Minnesota State Fair than I had ever been before, so much so that I made the first incarnation of my top-25 MNSF sightings list of all time in the days before the fair.  So did it live up to the hype that year?  Not really.  It was my weakest Minnesota State Fair of the decade.  I barely crossed the 100-sighting threshold and there were no truly blockbuster sightings, as evidenced by how few entries 2005 has in my top-100.  It was still a more productive day than any of my 1990s safaris where I hung out with my parents all day and left by 5 p.m., but definitely the weakest from the 2000s, especially considering I was out on my own all day and stayed until 10:30 p.m.  Grade:  C+

2006–This was the year where things blew wide open.  With one change to my formula, my number of total daily sightings nearly doubled.  In recent years, there were evening bandshell concerts which sidelined me from about 8 p.m. to 10:30.  For whatever reason, the quality of the concerts diminished badly starting this year, which meant my sightings numbers went off the hook.  But even within the traditional timeframe of years prior, my past records were shattered and my old record of 109 sightings for the day was exceeded before 7 p.m.  But the sightings just kept coming into the evening hours and I ultimately scored 165 sightings, which at the time seemed insurmountable.  And beyond the quantity there was incredible quality to go along with it, with two sightings that remain in my top-15 of all-time and four additional entries in my top-100.  I thought this stroke of good fortune was a fluke at the time, but in reality it was more a combination of staying longer hours and becoming more efficient in my navigation.  The result was the first of a stretch of three sightings days at the Minnesota State Fair that were my all-time best.  Grade:  A+

2007–I was a little distracted heading into this MNSF safari on my 30th birthday.  Any red-blooded male would be the day after a smoky date with my biggest high school crush Krissy.  Nonetheless, I found my groove after a slow start and settled into a pattern almost identical to the previous year’s with blistering numbers of sightings and some top-shelf quality to boot.  By my 7 p.m. meeting time with the folks, I had scored THREE epic sightings (all still among my top-20 MNSF sightings of all-time) and was already at 124 sightings on the day.  Even though the evening hours didn’t deliver the way they had the previous year, I still bested the seemingly impassable 165 sightings I scored in 2006 by pulling in 184 in 2007.  I might give a narrow edge to 2006 as the better of the two years because it was so unprecedented up to that point to be scoring the volume of quality sightings I was that day in 2006 while 2007 was an extension of that.  Nonetheless, I raked in eight of my top-100 MNSF sightings in 2007.  Not a bad way to celebrate my 30th birthday. Grade: A+

2008–Without a shadow of doubt, my best day ever of fetishing not only at the Minnesota State Fair, but of all-time.  I have described in the past the trajectory of this day as a snowball that built momentum as it rolled downhill until it became a full-on avalanche.  The first hour of the day was infuriatingly slow but things got rolling pretty well with a spattering of great sightings in the late morning and early afternoon.  Things got better and better into the late afternoon and early evening, both in terms of quality and quantity.  And by evening things were off the hook, so off the hook that the only reason I didn’t cross the 200-sighting threshold is because I was seeing so many sightings of incredible quality in those last two hours that I stuck around to inspect them in detail.  Even at 10 p.m., after 13 hours of walking, I was operating on pure adrenaline and didn’t even really notice my intense foot pain as I usually do.  I scored 192 total sightings including two epics that rank among my top-10 of all-time, along with a total of nine entries in my top-100.  It’s hard to imagine a scenario where I could have a better day of fetishing than this, but the Minnesota State Fair has delivered for me so strongly in the past that I’m not ruling anything out.  Grade:  A+

2009, Trip 1–I got a surprise second trip to the Minnesota State Fair in 2009.  It was a good thing too because my first all-day trip was disappointing.  It was a cool day to begin with, but by mid-afternoon the clouds rolled in and the wind picked up and things became downright unpleasant for a late August day.  Beyond that, there were lengthy stretches in the morning and afternoon where sightings were simply nonexistent and where my mood was at times melancholy and bored in a way that’s very rare for MNSF trips.  As the temps cooled in the late afternoon and the evening, sightings numbers did pick up.  I was able to top the previous year’s record for sightings numbers and crossed the double-century threshold for the first time with 206 sightings, but had to sit for a good portion of the last two hours because of foot pain that came with arriving on the grounds an hour earlier than usual and stopping less frequently to admire epic sightings, which were fewer than years previous.  I left with four sightings in my top-100 and expected my 2009 MNSF experience to be a bit of dud, until I scored a very unexpected half-day encore visit the following week.  Grade:  B-

2009, Trip 2–It was like being Superman, flying around the Earth to reverse time and recreate a day that had passed when my parents asked if I’d be interested in going to the Minnesota State Fair again on Labor Day weekend last year, if only for a half-day (my mom had to work the next morning so staying till after 10 wasn’t an option).  It was a warm and sunny day and right off the bat I could tell that it was gonna be a much better day than the week before.  Sightings came at a regular clip throughout the day and at no point was I bored or distracted the way I was the previous week.  Several blockbusters occurred in this time frame, and the day ended with my only MNSF epic sighting of 2009.  All in all, I scored 95 sightings during the half day, including an impressive six that made their way to my all-time top-100.  Grade:  A

2010, Trip 1—Despite being sick with a lingering head cold and getting by on less than two hours sleep the night before, I was ready to go at my first excursion to the Minnesota State Fair on a sticky 90-degree day that would be cut short at 7 p.m. since I would be attending my first evening bandshell concert in five years.  The day was generally mediocre with a spattering of worthwhile sightings in the day’s early stages, but the final hour or so of fetishing made the trip worthwhile as I scored a bounty of blockbusters, and one monster epic that ended things on a high point leading into the concert.  I was especially pleased knowing that only five days later I would be returning, this time for a full day of sightings bliss.  Grade:  B+

2010, Trip 2—My full day at the Minnesota State Fair started slowly in a number of ways.  I was still a little bit sick.  I was smarting from a would-be love interest telling me the night before she just wanted to be friends.  The morning temperatures had dipped into the 40s and female fairgoers were decked out in jackets and jeans rather than tanktops and shorts.  But the day would warm up to a comfortable mid-60s high that brought about a crowd of historic proportion to the fair that day, an all-time one-day record attendance that was almost too much in the afternoon hours.  Sightings were hard to spot in these crowds and the ones I was seeing were generally marginal.  The day was considerably below average.  But then something crazy happened when nightfall came and the final three hours of the day would churn out one blockbuster/epic sighting after another, producing one of the best sightings nights of my life.  The daytime crowds that proved too stifling would eventually produce the evening crowds that were just right in churning out the right demographics of smokers, and I was in the right place at the right time to see many of them.  I ended up salvaging a modest day of fetishing about as impressively as possible.  Grade: A-

2011, Trip 1–It isn’t often that a day at the Minnesota State Fair starts producing an endless litany of outstanding sightings before 2 p.m., but that’s exactly what I was experienced that day, particularly during the noon hour when I enjoyed one after another rock star sighting and was convinced I was on the cusp of one of my best days ever at the Minnesota State Fair.  Unfortunately, the clouds rolled in at mid-afternoon and while it stayed dry, the clouds were a perfect metaphor for the wet blanket that was thrown on the day, as sightings became a lot more irregular and a lot less memorable in the second half of the afternoon.  This dragged on into the evening, but in the final hour or so, I did go on a mini-roll and racked up a handful of quality sightings.  Any time you get even a period of a day that delivers the way the early hours this day is a gift, but the slowdown in the second half of the day did keep the day from ranking up there with my best ever days of fetishing.  Grade:  B+

2011, Trip 2–The inverse of my first visit to the Minnesota State Fair in 2011, I sat in the passenger seat in horror on the drive up to the fairgrounds with rain coming down in buckets and no assurances that it was going to clear up for the rest of the day.  After a late morning clearing when we got there, the rain came again around noon and I was starting to get very nervous.  But by mid-afternoon the clouds broke and the sightings came fast and furious.  While there were no genuine epics for the day, there was a steady stream of above-average material that lasted from about 3 p.m. through the evening hours till the time I left around 10:30, and you can’t ask for much more than that during a day of fetishing.  Grade: A-

2012, Trip 1–My first trip to the Minnesota State Fair in 2012 happened to be on my 35th birthday, but it was hard to get too thrilled as the forecast was predicting rain my early afternoon and I was actually anticipating it would be an abbreviated day, and that I would return the next day for a complete day of fetishing.  The rain did come around the noon hour, but it wasn’t as bad as expected and was actually a catalyst for a couple great sightings while taking shelter from the downpour.  The downside of the rest of the day is that while the worst of the rain ended after about an hour, I was still planning on leaving early because the fairgrounds were a sloppy mess but by mid-afternoon decided to stick around.  The uncertainty was a buzzkill on the day, and it didn’t help that the evening hours I wanted to stick around for ended up being below-average.  With all that said, I had an above-average sightings haul with an ebb and flow pattern but which peaked in the late afternoon.  It wasn’t one of my best sightings days by any stretch, but all things considered I stitched together a pretty good day of memorable encounters.  Grade:  B+

2012, Trip 2–My second day at the state fair this year was about perfectly on par with the first day in terms of substance, with a healthy haul of impressive sightings but no single sighting that burned up my world.  But I’ll rate the second day a tick higher for a couple of reasons.  First, the weather was perfect, and when you arrive at the fairgrounds on a sunny day when you know you won’t run into any weather issues, your morale is always higher and that’s very important.  Secondly, I had a better evening haul on my second trip, and good evening sightings help wrap up a great day at the fair with a ribbon.  Always nice to exit the grounds for the evening with a beaming smile on your face.  Grade:  B+

2013, Trip 1–I was understandably nervous going into the 2013 Minnesota State Fair because of the unsettling news that smoking would be restricted to “designated smoking areas”, threatening to blow up the best venue for smoker girl sightings the world has ever known.  But I was relieved to see that there would be a generous 18 designated smoking areas on the grounds rather than the three or four I suspected, and most of them were located in areas that had been frequented by smokers on smoke breaks in the past.  Couple that with a fair amount of noncompliant smokers puffing away wherever they chose and August 24, 2013, wasn’t noticeably different from sightings days past at the MNSF.  The biggest annoyance ended up being the heat and humidity.  It was a steady day for sightings with decent quality at every stage of the day, and the designated smoking areas occasionally working as nifty holding pens that helped me rather than hurt me in scoring sightings.  The evening hours really sparkled, however, with more civil disobedience of the smoking areas and a “sensory overload” spurt where I was scoring quality sightings so steadily I could barely process it.  For as dark as I let my thoughts drift in the months preceding on what this day was likely to be, it was a huge sigh of relief that for all my worries it ended up being an above-average sightings day.  Grade:  A-

2013, Day 2–My second trip to the 2013 MNSF on Labor Day weekend was far less hot and humid than the week before and seemed poised to be a fantastic day.  It got off to a much slower start than the week before, and even though the daytime hours produced my best MNSF sighting in three years, things didn’t get consistently good until after dark.  And ironically, things got really good only after the weather went to hell, with storm clouds moving in and a steady rain coming down around 8:30 and lasting a good hour.  The rain was the source of a good half dozen outstanding sightings, in large part because it delayed the concert by pop sensation Macklemore who was performing in the grandstand that night and brought my favorite demographic of fairgoers in impressive numbers.  So basically the day featured beautiful weather and a ho-hum array of sightings, while the evening featured miserable rain that emptied out half the crowd at the fairgrounds, but some of the hottest smokers in the state were the ones who stuck around.  Gotta love the Minnesota State Fair!  Grade: A-

The consistency and history of the Minnesota State Fair as a sightings venue clearly rates it as my favorite place to fetish.   I feel like I dodged a major bullet when the designated smoking areas didn’t ruin that for me.  The fair board seems to be trying to remain as welcoming to smokers as possible, unlike most venues, but their hand was forced when a little girl got burned in the eye by a cigarette.  I have no illusions that the designated smoking areas will hold the antismoking crybabies at bay forever, but I think I at least bought myself an additional few years of a Minnesota State Fair that is as close to a wide-open fetishing paradise as exists in America today.

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MNSF #1. The 1996 State Fair Girls Who Escalated My Fetish

My smoking fetish was officially born on the sunny mid-afternoon hours on August 28, 1996, only three days after my 19th birthday, and three days before I left for my freshman year of college. And given the intensity my fetish has taken on in the years since, it was one of the single most defining moments of my life as it made me finally come to terms with just how sexy I find it to be when girls smoke. It’s the “granddaddy of all sightings” that I dramatized in my 90% reality-based  “State Fair Girls” story on Smoke Signals a few years later, and I honestly don’t think it’s possible for this sighting to ever be dethroned from its berth at the top given its long-term impact…..

There I sat, with my mom, at a concert for has-been country singer  Billy Jo Royale who I didn’t even really want to see, but agreed to since my mom liked him and since we had a couple of hours to kill back in the time when I had grown pretty bored with the Minnesota State Fair.  After sitting in the bleachers awaiting the free concert to begin, up came these adorable beauties, all around 18, dressed in as sexy and classy of summer attire as any guy could ever dream of (tanktops, very upscale looking jean shorts with flashy and glamorous belts), and sat in the bench directly in front of us. The thought briefly crossed my mind, as I admired their perfect figures and beautiful faces of this assortment of three blonds and one brunette, that these girls would make some amazingly hot smokers, even though that thought generally didn’t consume my every encounter with attractive females as it does today.

In no more than 30 seconds, my wish would become a reality as these beauties, one by one, opened their purses and retrieved their respective packs of Marlboro Lights, sparking up their all-whites within less than a minute of each other and proceeding to smoke cigarette after cigarette after cigarette for the entire two hours we sat there, completely oblivious to the dismay of others sitting next to them, several of whom left in disgust as the girls snickered.  Even my mom gave me a “What in the world could those girls be thinking smoking like that?” look, but thankfully we didn’t move. I just shrugged while trying to hide the fact that my jeans were elevating before my eyes.

It’s hard to single out which girl was my favorite, and I found myself declaring a new favorite every time I studied a different girl.  One dark blond who sat on the right was attractive but not in the league of the other three, but immediately to her left was a bodacious platinum blond in a pink top, white shorts, and a glamorous belt.  To the left of her was a long-haired brunette in badass sunglasses, a blue top, and jean shorts who looked the most comfortable and natural smoking a cigarette.  And on the far left was another incredible blond in white shorts who was mind-blowingly hot.  Again, every time I laid eyes on one of these three girls, she became my new favorite.  They were all just that amazing.

The concert was as big of a blur to me as the air quality a few feet in front of me as these extraordinarily sexy 18-ish superbabes ingested unending volumes of tobacco into their perfectly proportioned young bodies. At one point, as explained in my “State Fair Girls” story, they even turned around and teased me with their smoking show, smiling at me while exhaling plumes of smoke very near me, which really drove me over the edge.  This was the first time I ever got an erection from watching chicks smoke, but it definitely wasn’t the last.  The girls just kept on smoking like lifetime professionals–as if they were getting paid to do so–and left a mountain of butts in their aftermath.  These images were burned into my mind for months (and in fact years) to come and I would never view the Minnesota State Fair the same way again.

In so many ways, this sighting set the stage for who I am today. Would I have the fetish as bad as I do today had it not been for this erotic experience? I can’t really say for sure. All I know is that from that day forward (and as I said I started college only three days after this sighting) I never missed the chance to watch a girl smoke again.

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MNSF #2. The Best Early Teen Smoker Girl of All-Time Puffing Away With Grandpa

As stated previously, I couldn’t stay very long at the fair on the dreary Friday in 2000 due to a commitment that evening and really didn’t want to stay very long given the weather, but in the final half hour of a day that had already proven quite productive, I scored the most epic young smoker sighting of my life.

To give a little background, I had been sitting at an early afternoon concert by now country music superstar Keith Urban back when he had only two hits under his belt, looking around for smokers as always, and repeatedly saw plumes of smoke going airborne from the direction of this young blond girl, sitting with what appeared to be her grandparents.  I never saw the girl with a cigarette and didn’t expect to as she was way too young and way too Barbie-doll cute.  The smoke, I told myself, had to be coming from one of her  grandparents. But that smoke just kept coming from where she was seated, beckoning my attention repeatedly from the awkward spot where I was seated. I never did see anything, but got plenty of chances to admire the cuteness of this little blond sweetheart even from my considerable distance away.

About three hours later, I was navigating the fairgrounds near the bungee jumping stations and saw a freshly lit all-white protruding from VERY young female fingers.  Instantly, I recognized these hands as belonging to the same girl I saw at the Keith Urban concert, again in the presence of the older couple who I assumed to be her grandparents.  I studied her closely, stunned as I determined there was no way she was older than 13, and may possibly have been even younger. I positioned myself a few yards away from them and watched in absolute awe as this most adorable girl casually smoked in the presence of her grandparents. Decked out in a cute red T-shirt and utilitarian white shorts, with long platinum blond hair flowing all the way down her back, the last thing one would have expected to see was a Marlboro Light approach her young lips, yet that was exactly what I was seeing.

As hot as mother-daughter smoker sightings are, I was witnessing a grandfather-granddaughter sighting (granny didn’t appear to smoke), and in the most public place in the state of Minnesota.  As she watched the bungee jumpers overhead, she jubilantly talked it over with her grandparents the way you would expect a 13-year-old girl would do, with the cigarette becoming animated in her hand amidst her excited responses at the brave bungee jumpers.  And she was no amateur.  Her inhales were deep and her exhales were tight plumes of straight-ahead smoke that sailed many inches in front of her face.  I could feel the blood rush to my crotch watching this, having to sit down to avoid the bulge in my jeans from showing. When she took her final drag, she crushed the cigarette out under her shoe, and for whatever reason it was at that moment it hit me how special what I had just seen really was.

Many of us with the smoking fetish can trace the origins of our fetish back to when we were little boys. The best way I can sell the magnitude of this sighting’s epicness is to call upon readers to recall your jubilation in those late elementary years when you discovered or heard rumors that one or two of your sixth-grade female classmates had started smoking….and then imagine the cutest blonde princess in your grade being the smoker, and smoking publicly in the company of her family!  It was like a perfect middle school fantasy come to life for a smoking fetisher and I experienced it, albeit 10 years later.

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MNSF #3. Brunette Babe With An Insatiable Cigar Addiction

I had just taken my early evening rest at the 2008 Minnesota State Fair, my greatest day of MNSF fetishing of all time, and after about 20 minutes of resting my aching body, decided it was time to begin my nightcap….with some of the best timing in world history. Only a couple minutes later while walking through the grounds, I spotted a cluster of four early 20′s hotties on the edge of the sidewalk after about a block of walking. An attractive long-haired dark blond extracted a cigarette from her purse and fired up, leading me to walk their direction for some further observation. As soon as I was standing in close proximity, I noticed an equally attractive long-haired brunette muttering something indecipherable to the blonde as she looked at the freshly lit cigarette, and then started fishing into her own purse as if to get one of her own. I knew the next sighting was at my doorstep, but imagine my delight when the item removed from her purse was not a cigarette, but a small tipped cigar.

It wasn’t the size of your typical Black and Mild. It was much shorter, only the length of a cigarette, but considerably bigger around. The contrast was striking as the brunette fired up her cigar. She was very feminine with her flowing mane of dark brown hair running all the way down her back, wearing a modest pink T-shirt for a top and skin-tight painted-on light blue jeans to advertise her unbelievable ass.

There were four girls in the cluster, each above-average on the attractiveness scale but somewhat hard to discern age-wise. I would guess they were 22, with somewhat of a weathered party girl look on their faces that could indicate they may have been as old as 25, but definitely no older than that. At the time, it was just the two smokers, but all my attention was on the cigar girl as my subfetish for novelty cigar sightings is even more intense than my cigarette fetish.

Watching her smoke the cigar completely lived up to expectations, as she would tilt her head into the sky after taking a drag, giving me a perfect vantage point as the ball of thick smoke disappeared down into her throat, followed by cloudy and dirty exhalations only a few seconds later. There was no ideal location to watch this incredible hotness unfold, and I found myself awkwardly watching from the side, attempting to act like I was waiting to meet someone yet still be close enough to breathe in some secondhand cigar fumes. Things would not get easier as the girls had a strange habit of stopping at a certain destination,  staying a few minutes, then meandering a half block or so and then stalling out again, meaning my presence would not escape notice. Nonetheless, when the cluster first took off, I delightfully followed right behind cigar girl, and was lucky enough to get splashed in the face with a couple lungfuls of filthy cigar smoke that lingered in the air several seconds after she released them from her black lungs.  The girls, only two of whom were smoking, stopped dead in their tracks again closer to the grandstand area, making my job extra difficult. But the best part of the sighting was soon to come…..

The girls were standing right in front of an anti-meth booth, complete with a display of photos of meth users. The two smokers approached the booth and dragged from their tobacco cylinders of choice, seconds before a teenage girl working the booth approached them with some literature. I noticed that the girl’s eyes lowered as she spoke to the young ladies, clearly taking note of the cigarette in the blond’s hand and the smelly cigar in the brunette’s hand. It’s rare that I see something so hot at the fair that my boy parts get uncontainably excited, but as I watched that brunette exhaling a cloud of cigar smoke right in front of the anti-meth booth, my “excitement” could be contained no longer. Soon after, the bizarre stop-and-go routine continued until they stopped at a corner near the DNR building. By this point, I really had to linger at a distance to avoid being spotted. A couple of the girls seemed to look my direction now and then, but never made direct eye contact, so I’m not certain whether I was spotted or not. I had spent a good 15 minutes observing this crew before the brunette finally finished her cigar, tossing it onto the curb with nothing but the plastic tip remaining.  I had seen all I needed to see, but just in case you think this sighting is completed, I should warn you I wasn’t through with these girls yet. Or is it that they weren’t through with me?!?!?!.

About an hour later near the grandstand, now after dark, I found myself staring down the barrel of a repeat sighting that I had never even imagined would resurface. It was the cluster of party girls from an hour earlier….including an encore performance from cigar girl!!! Amazingly enough, she was in the middle of another cigar. Two of her three female friends were smoking cigarettes, including the cute redhead who wasn’t smoking before and the sexy blonde who was. It was a perfect opportunity to briefly follow them again and ingest some more stinky secondhand cigar smoke, but I didn’t want to risk being spotted given how much time I had already spent watching these girls.   Still, the location was better for spying this time as I sat on a bench near the grandstand about 20 yards away and watched the show. Again I was struck by the contrast between this brunette cutie’s pink shirt, tight blue jeans, and stinky plastic-tipped cigar, which she continued to inhale every puff from. I couldn’t imagine anything sexier, and was overjoyed as the cluster walked away and the brunette deposited her second plastic-tipped cigar butt on the fairgrounds pavement, and I was intrigued watching the large cherry splatter dramatically as it hit the street.

Another hour after that, it was almost 9:30 and I was continually amazed at what I was stumbling into, and nothing more amazing that what I would see next. Walking past the haunted mansion on the busiest street on the grounds, there they were AGAIN! The party girls including the pink-shirted brunette stogie girl. None appeared to be smoking this time so I kept walking around the perimeter of the nearby horticulture building. Ten minutes or so had passed before I made another pass by the haunted mansion to see if my favorite girls of the day were still there. And boy were they. I could see freshly lit cigarettes in the hands of the blond and redhead and seconds after making that observation, what did I see but my brunette sweetheart firing up her THIRD cigar in the last two hours. I made one final pass closely behind her and timed it perfectly to ingest one more exhalation of cigar smoke.

There were so many high points to that 2008 MNSF sightings day, but this was tops, and it was also my greatest cigar sighting of all-time. I’d give my first-born child to see something even remotely like it again.

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MNSF #4. Teen Smoking Krista Clone Corrupts Unattractive Friend And Smokes While She Eats

My 2006 visit to the Minnesota State Fair reached an uncharted level of hotness compared to prior years, both in terms of quality and quantity. I had hit the “sightings century mark” at an astounding 6:30 p.m., at least three hours ahead of schedule from previous years, but the cute 20-something blonde that represented my 100th sighting near the food building commons area was a memory in the mere seconds it took to raise my head and find Sighting #101, a beautiful 16-ish chickie with a mane of long and curly light brown hair running all the way down her back, and an unlit cigarette dangling from her lips.

Immediately sensing something special about this girl, I began to follow her and a redheaded friend who was considerably less attractive. The brunette wore a lovely bare-midriff blouse that exposed her well-toned belly to the tens of thousands of lucky male fairgoers, as well as a tight pair of denim Capris that fashionably showed off her glowing teenage booty and lovely lower legs.

It took about 30 seconds for her to fish her lighter out of her purse, but when she did, she sparked up that cigarette. She took a couple of drags before handing the cigarette to her friend and then wasted no time firing up another cigarette of her own. I got particular guilty pleasure about the fact that this adorable teen beauty was the bad influence on her less attractive friend. From there, the girls decided they wanted something to eat, and stood in line at this stand that appeared to sell little cups of frozen custard or something of the like.

Luckily, the stand was two-sided, so I was able to go to the other side and see through the glass, finally getting a good look at her. She was more beautiful than I previously suspected. Not only because of her astounding mane of light brown hair, but also her flawlessly beautiful face, she reminded me of Krista, the daughter of a woman my mom works with who is now college age. Krista is a nonsmoker, and homecoming queen hot…and this nicotine girl at the Minnesota State Fair possessed facial features cut from identical cloth. It was like a fantasy come to life as I recalled all the times I thought about how hot Krista would look as a smoker.

It only got better as the girl stood up to place her order, unapologetically holding her cigarette above the counter and proudly displaying her youthful nicotine addiction to the world. After receiving their orders, the girls carried their desserts and their cigarettes to the sidewalk, where they quietly sat and consumed a toxic brew of transfat from the custard and deadly carcinogens from their cigarettes. And consume they did!  I sat on the sidewalk across the street and got to see a surprising amount considering the foot traffic between us. The pretty girl went back and forth from eating a spoonful of her frozen dessert to taking a drag from her cigarette, dragging furiously and frequently, sucking the tobacco out of that cigarette faster than I would have expected and producing a cesspool of air pollution surrounding her beautiful face.  She would soon crush the cigarette out in front of her on the sidewalk at the exact moment that her friend did.

No more than 60 seconds had passed before the pretty girl turned around and started fishing through her purse. Could this 15-16 year-old stunner possibly be so addicted to cigarettes that she needed an exciting encore less than a minute after polishing off her last? DING! DING! DING! Every part of my fatigued anatomy stopped for a second as the pack of Camels in her purse was extracted for the third time in less than 10 minutes, and the girl lit herself up again. It was very clear that her frozen custard had quickly become an afterthought, taking a backseat to her obviously insatiable nicotine dependency. She only got a few drags off of the second cigarette before the two of them got up to leave. I couldn’t help but following a little further, even though I’m pretty sure they spotted me by this point and soon realized that I needed to abort or risk being called out for stalking her. As I studied this beauty’s amazing face one last time before parting ways, I would’ve given anything to turn back the clock and be 16 again if only for that evening.

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MNSF #5. Lindsey Tortures Her Teen Friend With Cigarette

In the evening hours that wrapped up my second evening at the 2010 Minnesota State Fair, I scored more than a half dozen blockbuster sightings, several of which are on this list, and the quality of the blockbusters just kept escalating.  I was already on an adrenaline burst before I even stumbled into the most epic sighting of the year and one of my all-time MNSF classics.  Without further adieu, I present you….the legendary Lindsey.

I had spent so long in the same parts of the fairgrounds tracking sightings that I was now long overdue for another journey to the east side of the grounds.  In this case, I found myself at the far eastern gate where I was at the early stages of what would be my best sighting of the day.  This is another one where I need to warn you….hold onto your hat….because you’re going on the ride of your life….

By now, KISS was performing and could be heard virtually any place within a half mile of the grandstand, but I just happened to be in a sparsely populated area near the east gate outside the range of the KISS concert, and was thus able to hear voices in close range, which saved me from missing out on the upcoming sighting.  I was busting pretty good through this east side since there weren’t many people there, but took a quick mental note of a trio of cute 17ish girls who had apparently just entered the fairgrounds at the 9:00 hour.  I took a quick look at them, didn’t think they looked like obvious smokers, and decided I should press forward.  Thankfully they weren’t out of hearing range as I heard one of the girls behind me saying “Lindsey, now we ARE gonna stop sometime because I really need a cigarette!”  I quickly jerked back my head to see an adorable brunette looking at the curly-haired blonde who she just made the request to.  The blonde didn’t bat an eyelash or say a word, giving her the silent treatment, which provoked the brunette to continue pleading.  “Now c’mon Lindsey.  I’m ALWAYS giving you cigarettes!”  Holy shit!  Needless to say, I followed.  I already counted these two as sightings just from that banter, but I wouldn’t be satisfied until I actually saw them smoking.

As I followed I got to make a number of observations.  Remember I said that there were three friends.  The third wheel was a modest brunette who did little to capture my interest.  The other two had me absolutely fascinated.  The brunette doing all the begging was the best looking of the three, with a beautiful wholesome face, long brown hair, a slender body, but a less than sexy red sweatshirt and utilitarian jeans below the neck.  But it was Lindsey the blond who fascinated me most.  She was also pretty, and had those alluring curly blond locks as well as a white and gold top.  But below the waistline was where she really sparkled, literally. Lindsey was wearing a short pair of medium-blue jean shorts that was made glam outlined in gold glittery trim.  Watching that ass wiggle in those shorts I would have killed to have gotten my hands on it.  The girls were pressing forward quickly, with Lindsey sipping a drink she must have purchased just after entering the gate.  The begging brunette seemed to be doing most of the talking, but unfortunately as we moved closer to the grandstand their conversation was becoming inaudible due to the noise from the KISS concert, but judging from the body language it looked as though the brunette was continuing to plead with Lindsey to stop for a cigarette.

It was shortly after this point that I would come across my most difficult decision in the history of Minnesota State Fair fetishing.  As I followed Lindsey and her girls, I crossed paths with a duo that took my breath away.  I looked to my left to see an amazing blonde 21ish beauty in a red top and white shorts holding a white cylinder with a glowing red cherry on the end.  Standing next to her was a long-haired brunette in jean shorts, also smoking.  They were the most beautiful girls I had seen all day.  We’re talking perfect 10s here.  These girls belong in Hollywood.  They were standing in a cluster of three guys, one of whom was smoking a giant cigar.  If only the girls were smoking cigars, Lindsey and her crew would have been a distant memory.  Now…what to do?  These girls were so gorgeous it was crazy….yet the storyline behind the Lindsey sighting was so epic that I wanted to see that play out too.  But was it gonna?  Just because the brunette wanted to “stop for a cigarette” didn’t mean they were going to anytime soon.  And meanwhile, I had these two epic beauties right in front of me who were smoking in the present tense.  Watching Lindsey and her friends walk forward into the crowd, I decided I was gonna try to have it both ways…and figured there was a decent chance I would since the 21ish babes were wrapping up their cigarettes.  I stuck around and observed their last two succulent drags.  Almost in tandem, the girls dropped their cork filters to the ground.  I took one last look at these beauties, especially that blonde in the white shorts.  How is it even possible for girls this hot to exist, I thought to myself.  I relished in this observation for a moment but then had to see if, just maybe, I could catch up to Lindsey.

I raced through the area behind the grandstand in the direction they were headed.  The crowd had thinned down some now so it was not completely out of the question for me to find them, but it still seemed like a longshot.  I was starting to lose hope as I continued my fast pace by the west end of the grandstand….until I laid eyes on that shiny beacon that was Lindsey’s jean-shorted gold-trimmed ass.  I was back in business, baby!  I continued following until they came to a stop at the edge of the midway near the radio station.  It seemed to be a hangout for a lot of teens and young adults not quite old enough to party at the nearby beer gardens.  The three girls quickly struck up conversation with what I assumed were friends they planned to meet there, although I suppose it’s possible they just decided to yuck it up with other kids their age that happened to be hanging there.  I was starting to get nervous as I stood on the curb across the street thinking that this might not play out, but the begging brunette just wasn’t gonna let that happen.  There was a flurry of people that made it easy to lose people in the crowd, but I had an opening to watch the brunette, reading her lips as she said to Lindsey, “PLEEASE!  I need a cigarette!”  She then held up one finger and said “Just one!”  I have to admire Lindsey for being such a torturer, making her best friend beg her for a single cigarette.  You gotta figure Lindsey’s current or future boyfriends are gonna have to work just as hard or harder to get a blowjob out of her.

And then, at least 10 minutes after this sighting began, Lindsey dug into her purse and extracted a bronze pack of Marlboro 27s.  The would-be epic sighting of the night was finally gonna become an official sighting.  Lindsey handed the brunette a cigarette and then placed one in her own mouth.  The brunette looked adorable dangling that unlit cigarette for a good minute as Lindsey got out her lighter, lit herself up first, and then sparked up her nicotine-deprived friend.  As suspected, the third girl didn’t smoke.  Now it was time to watch the show…and the girls didn’t disappoint.

Actually, the brunette may have disappointed a little, at least compared to Lindsey who was a total pro, taking frequent and lengthy drags and spewing generous snoots full of smoke in her exhales.  Sometimes she was thoughtful and turned to exhale.  Other times, she exhaled straight ahead and at least twice she caught the nonsmoking girl in the face.  Other friends were in and out of the conversation, but Lindsey and the brunette were the only smokers.  The brunette wasn’t a bad smoker, but her exhales were less dense and her drags less frequent than Lindsey’s, although I must confess that from that angle I was watching I couldn’t see nearly as much of the brunette.  Lindsey, on the other hand, hacked up a lugie about halfway through her cigarette and instead of the girlish flick of spittle most little girls spit, hers had volume and distance.  It wasn’t a big lugie, but she sent it flying an impressive distance.  And after that, things got even weirder.  She had a strange habit of extending her arm, bending her wrist, and ashing the cigarette, but one time while doing this, she accidentally tapped the cigarette right out of her hand.  At first, I thought she was just finishing up the cigarette, but it was a genuine accident and she quickly picked up the cigarette off the dirty pavement and stuck it back in her mouth.  She wasn’t quite done with this cigarette yet!

The girls became mobile which had its upsides and downsides.  It was hard to lose Lindsey with that ass of hers gleaming, but the crowd was such that it was still a real possibility.  And she kept puffing on that cigarette long after I expected it was at its end.  The brunette had apparently already lost hers, which was curious since she smoked much slower than Lindsey.  But as Lindsey dropped her butt, I found out why.  Lindsey had smoked it right down to the filter.  There was a speck of paper left, but every morsel of tobacco had been smoked out of it into Lindsey’s black lungs.  I took one final look at that adorable ass of hers swaggering its way onto the horizon, aware that I had almost assuredly scored my best sighting of the day.

My mood at this point was all-out euphoria, something I haven’t felt since fireworks at Summerfest 2009 where the smokers were absolutely everywhere.  I literally started running as soon as I reached a point on the grounds that was empty, so much so that some drunk from the beer gardens jokingly shouted out, “No running!”  If you would have told me at 7:00 that my sore feet would have been capable of sprinting across the fairgrounds, I would have told you that you were crazy.

The blockbuster-within-an-epic sighting in which I took an incredible risk paid off completely and I was able to identify three out of the four butts and got to watch all four girls smoke.  It’s a damn tall order for any sighting in 2011 to top this one.

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MNSF #6. The Original Minnesota State Fair Cigarette Molestor

There were no shortage of unforgettable moments at the 2008 Minnesota State Fair, but this monster epic from the late afternoon was one of the high points, not only of this year but of my entire Minnesota State Fair experience.  It was also somewhat groundbreaking in that it was the first sighting where I really took note of the smoking technique of a particularly addicted girl and have found myself studying the techniques of smoker girls more thoroughly as a consequence of the show this girl put on….

It was around 5 p.m. as I approached the grandstand area, encircling the east side of the seating area and quickly scoring two impressive sightings.  But after completing the loop, I was faced with two sightings prospects occurring simultaneously, and am pretty sure I made the right choice…..spotting this angellic-looking 19-20ish dark brunette with long and curly hair exiting the grandstand and producing a pack of Marlboro Mediums. I noticed a badge clipped onto her black slacks and recognized she was a grandstand worker, most likely one of the vendors for the commercial exhibits underneath the grandstand. I hadn’t had a blockbuster grandstand worker sighting since that epic supersmoking cutie in 2000 who was #12 on my list, but I definitely sensed correctly that I was about to have another one now.

She was dialing numbers on her cell phone as she leaned up against a tree right in front of the seating area. She was incredibly beautiful, but did not have a particularly flashy or glamorous look.  Her red blouse and dress slacks made her look a little more professional, but her girl-next-door face gave her a distinctive and heartwarming allure. In itself, that made her a great sighting. But it was her technique that elevated her to another level. Amidst her distracting cell phone call, she dragged intermittently from her cigarette as though it was an afterthought, but the robust drags were nonetheless intense and extreme with an unquestionable aura of pleasure evident on her face. But it was what happened after the drags that intrigued most.

Literally, 7-10 seconds passed where the smoke lingered inside her coal black lungs before the smoke came pouring out of her mouth and nose. Even more amazing was that the smoke kept coming after the initial exhale. After every exhale, residual smoke continued to escape all three of her facial orifices with every breath. Smoke was literally oozing out of this girl like incense from a metal container waved around the church by a Catholic priest during Lent. And it was the same routine with every drag. Deep and intense drags, a period of extended holding where you could almost take a nap and still wake up before the first sign of smoke escaped the inside of her body, and then more smoke spilling out of her gorgeous face for as long as 30 seconds after the original exhale. This struck me as the smoking style of a 20-year veteran smoker coming from a girl who was most likely only 20 years old.

Unfortunately, the performance ended entirely too quickly. She would end the phone chat and quickly retire the two-thirds smoked cigarette, stubbing it out and placing the remainder in her Marlboro Mediums pack to finish off later. Nonetheless, what a huge sighting.  For months afterwards, I would lay head to sleep and see smoke pouring of this girl’s face with every breath. In the years since I’ve witnessed a lot of vaguely similar smoking performances, but none quite as overpowering as this one, particularly since she made it seem so effortless.  When I see a girl this ferociously addicted to cigarettes that she practically molests the cigarette in her mouth and molests the smoke inside her lungs, I reeeeallly wanna have sex with her….and I desperately wanted to have sex with this one.

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MNSF #7. My First Little Cigar Sighting From A Worthy Brunette

I stated previously that 2004 was my first great day at the Minnesota State Fair.  Even in the early morning hours I was scoring impressive sightings, but it was the later hours of the morning that produced a groundbreaking first-of-its-kind sighting for me that I will never forget.

I was breezily navigating an unpopulated east side corner of the fairgrounds when I spotted this adorable 22-ish dark brunette with shoulder-length hair and the most perfect girl-next-door face leaving one of the buildings all by herself. She was dangling something brown from her young lips which immediately froze me in my tracks. At first, I thought it was a More cigarette as she stopped quickly to light up, but the undeniable aroma of cigar smoke that quickly followed the light-up made it abundantly clear that this wholesome cutie just lit up a small Swisher Sweet cigar at the Minnesota State Fair…..

There seems to be a growing “little cigar” trend nowadays, particularly in inner cities, but it was still largely nonexistent in the Upper Midwest in 2004, and this adorable girl in no way fit the stereotypical demographic of a little cigar smoker, yet there she was, holding her stinky little brown treasure at her side as she proceeded through the grounds with an enticing mix of awkwardness and confidence. My crotch expanded instantly inside my jeans and I managed to follow her at a distance where I wasn’t exactly conspicuous, but was still able to smell the awful but alluring stench of cheap cigar smoke lingering in the air after she exhaled. My guess is she probably knew she was being followed, but there was no way I gonna miss out on this, watching her cute little butt wiggle in her painted-on jeans with each step. Here was this girl, exuding femininity with every flourish of her hips, yet smoking a smelly little cigar at the Minnesota State Fair.  I dared not even fantasize about something like this up to this point….

This was one of the only times in my years of fetishing where I was briefly overcome with an animal lust sensation…wishing I could have my way with this girl right then and there with her willing and instinctive acceptance, tasting the fresh cigar smoke on her breath the whole time. After watching her drop her little cigar to the pavement and stomp it out before walking away, I had way too much built up “tension” to carry on without a quick trip to the john to relieve myself. It was the only time a sighting got to me that much that I had to make a detour to relieve the tension.  There were many other moments that day would impress, but this was unquestionably the high point of the day, or of the entire year of 2004 for that matter.

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MNSF #8. Flirting And Smoking With the DJ On Live Radio

Here’s another epic sighting from the early evening of the 2001 Minnesota State Fair, only about 15 minutes after I scored my #16 sighting from this list.  I was walking past this radio station broadcasting live and interacting with people on the sidewalk hovering in front of their booth. This radio station booth has produced a number of great sightings in the years since, but nothing even in the same ballpark as this one….

The deejay on the stage broadcasting live was talking to two extremely attractive 16-17 girls with long dark brown hair who were both smoking cigarettes like seasoned pros. These girls were kind of in the “in-between” territory as whether they looked like smokers or not. I wasn’t necessarily surprised to see them smoking, but I was surprised that they were copiously dragging from their cigarettes while talking to an adult male deejay ON LIVE RADIO….with a cluster of people behind them listening to their banter with the deejay!

And like I said, these girls were no amateurs. Their inhales were deep and intense. Their exhales were thick, extremely cloudy, and came in tight synchronized streams. I watched in awe for several minutes, not necessarily hearing what they were talking about with the deejay but being too mesmerized by their smoking show to care.

After the girls finished their cigarettes, I decided to take off, naturally expecting the show was over, but still making a mental note that this best sighting of the day just might not be finished yet. I walked a quick loop around the block and returned to the radio station booth no more than 10 minutes later….and girls (maybe sisters, maybe just friends, I’m not sure…but they looked quite a bit alike) were still there….smoking ANOTHER round of cigarettes with the same amount of gusto they put into their first round of cigs, and still flirting with the deejay on the air.

I kind of wish I could have heard the discussion to catch if the deejay was flirtatiously scolding the clearly underage cuties for their heavy smoking. You gotta wonder if that deejay had the fetish himself. Why else would he indulge these smoker girls into such a long discussion as they spewed their carcinogens in his direct path? And I also wondered what some of the people in the crowd were thinking watching this illegal display of tobacco consumption by beautiful underage dark brunettes with zero inhibition.  I would soon meet up with my parents en route to an evening concert, but my evening had more than been made after this epic.

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MNSF #9. Only 14 And Blowing Smoke at the Cops

Another epic from the 2007 Minnesota State Fair, and in this case the most memorable 30th birthday gift the fair would provide me that day.  I was journeying towards the midway in the late afternoon hours of that fine day where I would be on the receiving end of my most epic sighting of the day. Throughout the day, I would always see clusters of impossibly cute early teenage girls on the fairgrounds, the kinds of hotties that every junior high boy lusted for back in the day, and every time I crossed such a cluster, I wished that at some point in the day, the opportunity would arise to see just one of them with a cigarette in hand in the year 2007. Well, my time was now…..

A group of four dollish 13 or 14-year-old girls were working their way from the midway to the Heritage Square area of the fairgrounds. Sometimes when there is only one girl, it’s hard to discern if she is really as young as she originally looks, but there were four girls in this bunch, and they were very clearly in that 8th grade age range. One of them, an adorable blond in a red and white striped tanktop and white shorts, had herself a cigarette extending from her fingers as she walked by. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing, and proceeded to follow the group of girls en route to Heritage Square.

But the sighting was about to take on an entirely new dimension as the group would wander directly past a parked squad car with two police officers sitting inside. I took notice of the cop spotting the young girl smoking the cigarette, and so did one of the other three girls in the group (a light brunette cutie in a denim miniskirt), who nudged her friend in the shoulder and muttered something to her that was inaudible from my distance, but that I figured was a warning that the cop spotted her smoking. With God as my witness, this blond babe….who didn’t look ANYTHING like a rebel….turned herself completely around a released one of the cloudiest exhales I’ve seen in recent memory directly pointed to the squad car she had just walked by!!!!! The gesture was a thousand times more fierce than a middle finger would have been….and it was coming from this 14-ish girl that looked like she should be a “B squad” cheerleader.  I had all I could do to restrain myself from bursting out into cartwheels.

The group of girls would press forward, and the blond smoker handed off the cigarette to the miniskirted light brunette (every bit as cute as the blond) who warned blondie about the cop watching. The brunette took a few puffs of her own. By this point, I was standing directly behind them and ingesting the headwind of every exhale their young lips spewed, all the while admiring their adorable early teen butts in the respective shorts and denim skirt. As the girls ascended the steps into Heritage Square, the blond (who got the cigarette back after her friend took a couple of drags) dropped it right on the steps. It was a Marlboro Red! These junior high princesses were smoking full-tar Marlboro Reds! Any wonder why this masterpiece is an entry in my all-time top ten??!?!?!?!?  I wouldn’t get another sighting that great for the rest of the day, but it was the sighting that really set the pace for the wildly productive ensuing late afternoon hours.

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MNSF #10. Storing Up on Nicotine Before The Hinder Concert

My first day at the 2010 Minnesota State Fair was fairly unsubstantial for most of the day, but around 6 p.m. in my final hour of sightings before meeting up with the family I scored a monster blockbuster that changed the trajectory of the day and ushered in a very impressive final hour, with nothing even coming close to measuring up to the quality of this dramatic gem that took place in the seating area to the east of the grandstand. ….

Sitting next to a boyfriend was a super-cute 22ish dark blond wearing a white tanktop and a perfect-fitting denim miniskirt that looked adorable on her.  Right away as I approached, I saw a cigarette in the hand of both the guy and girl.  I made a second pass to get a better look at the girl.  She wasn’t a knockout beauty, but very cute and wholesome-looking, a solid 8.5 on a scale of 1-10 who added to her allure significantly with that hot little skirt.  There was no place to sit next to the girl, so I had to sit next to the guy and as a result flew pretty close to the sun having to peer over him to get an occasional look at his girlfriend.  It was worth whatever risk though as I saw that first drag as cutie took a good four-second inhale before I watched the thick ball of creamy smoke disappear into her throat for a few moments, resurfacing again in about three seconds with one of the strangest exhales I’ve ever seen.  The smoke spewed out of her mouth first and the jet of smoke fired skyward while the spillover from her nose came later and fired downward. Usually these “jet stream” exhales tend to combine coming out of the mouth and nose to form one stream of smoke, but with this girl, a skybound stream of smoke lasted a couple of seconds before the second act emerged, a nasal stream of smoke plunging downward.  I would see a couple more drags from her, but none that upclose, so I’m not sure if I just caught her in a special drag or if this is the way she regularly smoke.  Either way, you can’t imagine how much I wanted to leap over this boyfriend, hike up this girl’s cute little skirt, and fuck her brains out right there on the cement slab.

Whatever the case, that was only the second hottest part of the sighting.  The boyfriend finished his cigarette first but within about 30 seconds, girly wrapped up hers as well, stubbing it out and dropping it to the pavement below her feet.  I expected they would soon get up to leave, but my adorable and feminine blonde friend had different ideas as she proceeded to extract her pack of Marlboro Lights from her purse only about 20 seconds later and was determined to keep the stink alive.  She fired up another one, and as I said, I didn’t get a very good view of her drags, but I was amazed at how quickly she made the cigarette disappear, apparently taking pretty deep drags into those black lungs of hers.  The boyfriend did not initially light up another cigarette and was a fairly quiet guy.  The girl wasn’t a motor mouth by any stretch, but she still did 90% of the talking as she pulled out her tickets from her purse and commented on how they bought the tickets in June, yadda, yadda, yadda.  But then the conversation got epic…

The girl told the guy he better have another cigarette because it would be a long time in the concert before they’d get their next chance.  The guy acted like it didn’t matter to him one way or another, but did heed her advice and fired up a second cigarette.  The girl was approaching the end of her second cigarette and continued speculating on the length of the concert.  And that’s when it happened.  The girl looked at her fast-diminishing cigarette and said to the boyfriend “I’m thinking of having another one!”  Are you kidding me, I thought to myself.  Three cigarettes in a row back-to-back!  How much nicotine does one girl need??!?!  Unfortunately, the boyfriend shook his head no, indicating he didn’t want to sit through yet another of his foul-smelling girlfriend’s cigarettes.  What’s the matter with you, man!  ANY TIME a hot girl tells you she wants another cigarette, the answer should be an emphatic “YES!!!”.  This time, the girl took a final drag from her cigarette and dropped it to the pavement still smoldering….

In just a few short moments, the two of them got up en route to the grandstand show.  This finally gave me the opportunity to see what she looked like up-close.  Suffice it to say she lived up to expectations completely, with a petite little body about 5’3”, very nice boobs poking out of that white tanktop, and a lower body framed beautifully in that little denim skirt of hers.  Naturally, I thought her walking off would finally be the sunset to this incredible sighting, but she just wouldn’t go quietly.

The boyfriend was still smoking his second cigarette, but the girl blew me away when she held out her hand and grabbed hold of the boyfriend’s cigarette.  He may have denied her the third cigarette she wanted, but he was gonna pay for that by sacrificing some of his own.  I watched as she finished off his cigarette, not even giving him the option of having a final drag himself.  Where do I find these girls?!?!  She was the nicotine girl equivalent of a camel storing up on fat before making an epic journey across the Sahara Desert. Suddenly, the mediocrity of the hours leading up to this point had become a distant memory.

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MNSF #11. Mother And Early Teen Daughter Sighting Is Throwback To A Better Era

While the daytime hours during my second day at this year’s Minnesota State Fair produced a pretty good clip of sightings, there weren’t many that really blew my mind….with one incredible exception in the mid-afternoon.  The moment that still seems surreal to me months later.  It’s when I saw Sighting #40 of the day, the kind of sighting I thought existed only in the past….the kind of sighting I never expected to see again….

Wandering on the block on the north side of the beer gardens block and looking up toward one of the more remote smoking areas, I would be stopped dead in my tracks one bench before I got there.  A family of three occupied a bench.  Dad wasn’t smoking, but mother and daughter were.  I was taken aback on first glance and kept approaching, and with each footstep it became clear that this daughter was young….and I mean very young.  She had a sweet face, filled with bubbly youthful energy and long straight blond hair flowing past her shoulders.  Maybe in 1990 it wouldn’t have blown my mind to see a girl of this pedigree with a cigarette, even smoking in front of her parents….but in 2013 it was downright unthinkable.  I snapped an early photo that was pretty mediocre as it was from a little too far away, right before she took her first drag.  The drag itself was not one of an amateur.  There were no stylistic flourishes per se but this was not this little girl’s first cigarette.  She and the parents watched the extreme ride in front of them as mother and daughter smoked and all appeared amused as they observed.  It was amidst this backdrop that a third party entered the scene and changed the trajectory of the sighting…..

A father approached the bench with two young kids to take a seat, asking them if they minded sharing the bench.  The family was all smiles, particularly the bubbly young blond smoker who, for whatever reason, was absolutely beaming.  At first I thought they knew each other because the dynamic didn’t otherwise make sense, as this clearly WAY underage smoker girl would never be so casual and uninhibited while smoking in the presence of complete strangers.  But as this father got his first good look at the family he was now sharing a bench with, it became quickly obvious that they didn’t know each other.  He took a second look, and then a third look, clearly blown away as I was at this at the sight of this young girl publicly smoking with parental acceptance.

The smoking part of this sighting had one more dynamite moment for me.  My girl took her fourth (and sadly final) drag that I witnessed of the mostly smoked cigarette, and then tilted her head upward.  Keep in mind that this bench was very tightly packed now with so many people on it, so her exhale was bound to invade somebody’s airspace…and in this case it was that of her overweight, working-class nonsmoking father.  A gorgeous mushroom cloud of smoke erupted from this girl’s still-developing respiratory system and while there wasn’t a direct blast into dad’s face, his nostrils were no more than an inch away from his early teen daughter’s air pollution.  I had all I could do to keep my knees from buckling at that moment.  Unfortunately, the smoking part of the sighting was gonna come to a close at least a drag sooner than it should have…..

I couldn’t hear exactly what the young father with the two kids who sat next to this family said to them, but he was pointing to the bathroom area near the beer gardens and I suspect he said “you know, the smoking area is over there”.  Just that quickly, the smiles and good times of mother and daughter smokers vanished….and the daughter crushed her cigarette out onto the bench and dropped the butt to the ground.  Not a word was said otherwise, and apparently the father who made the comment didn’t know they were one bench away from another smoking area.

But even though the smoking portion of the sighting was done as the daughter was concerned, there were still all kinds of additional revelations yet to come.  The daughter stood up from the crowded bench and continued to look at the extreme ride spinning around in front of her.  For the umptieth time in this sighting, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  Up to that point, I was being very conservative in guessing that this girl was 15, but seeing her presexualized body in a vertical position, it became clear she was at most 14 and probably even younger than that.  She had no hips at all and just a couple nubs for boobs in her green tanktop.  Her ass had the beginnings of a curvature in a skimpy pair of brown and white jean shorts. I snapped a full frontal photo and studied it again today, and am convinced that this little cutie is only about to start seventh grade!

The father with the kids got up and left, perhaps annoyed that the mother was still smoking.  The final part of the sighting smoking-wise included the mom stubbing out her cigarette and handing it to the daughter to throw into the trash, which she did, adorably leaving her own cigarette sitting on the ground even as she was tossing mom’s.  I was gonna ID this butt if it was the last thing I ever did so I had to wait out the family continuing to sit there.  While waiting, I looked to the right to the aforementioned smoking area only one bench over from this family, and standing there was ANOTHER mother and daughter smoker duo, where the daughter was a beautiful early 20s light brunette in a very feminine light blue dress.  I caught her in mid-drag at one point looking my direction.  At any other time of the day this girl would have been a huge fetish target, but right now this incredible family had me completely captivated.

I made the connection right away as this sighting was unfolding, but sitting here watching them observe the extreme ride, it struck me just how similar this was to MNSF #2, the most popular sighting on my blog and my second-best sighting of all-time.  Now this girl was an absolute doll, but she lacked that “hottest girl in the middle school” IT factor that my 13ish blond from 2000 smoking with grandpa did.  Still, the fundamentals were the same….an unashamed public display of cigarette smoking from a bubbly, long-haired blond early teen who was giddy watching the extreme rides from a half block away in the company of her accepting elders.  I never thought I’d see any sighting of its kind again after 2000, but I should have learned to never underestimate the Minnesota State Fair.

After another couple of minutes, the family got up to leave, never to be seen again yesterday.  Breathless with excitement, I sat down and checked out the girl’s discarded cigarette butt.  A sighting that was a flashback to 2000 up to that point suddenly became a flashback to 1978.  The cigarette she was smoking was a Merit!  I have NEVER seen a Merit smoked by a girl I’ve fetished and can’t recall anybody smoking the brand since some point in the 80s.  Who was this family?!?!?  Whoever they were, they single-handedly made my second visit to the 2013 Minnesota State Fair unforgettable.

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MNSF #12. Grandstand Worker Cutie Supersmokes On A Quick Break

I already cited how despite being the gloomiest day that I ever visited the Minnesota State Fair, the year 2000 produced a few of the best sightings I would ever score and transform it into one of the metaphorically brightest and sunniest days in the history of my fetish.

This was the last year I spent any time at all with the parents going through the commercial exhibit buildings, even though for about two-thirds of my day I went off on my own.  But it was my parents’ presence that gave some yummy context to this sighting. We went underneath the grandstand during the low-traffic morning hours and I saw this one commercial exhibit station peddling some sort of velcro harnesses. I didn’t really pay much attention to the harnesses, but assumed they were for emergencies of some kind. Anyway, one of the three workers there was this very attractive early 20s brunette in a skimpy blue tanktop and well-fitting khaki shorts that perfectly accentuated her curvy bottom. She was showing a customer how the harnesses worked as I walked by and I thought to myself, “She’s cute” and kept walking.

About an hour later, I was walking outside the grandstand by myself, feeling liberated and enthusiastic in one of my maiden solo voyages in search for smokers when I suddenly found one….her! She flew out of that grandstand like a woman on a mission and I immediately recognized her as the girl selling the velcro harnesses.  She quickly fired up a Marlboro Light that seemed to come out of nowhere, and was soon to become the first girl I had ever seen “supersmoking” a cigarette in a public setting. This girl was FEROCIOUSLY pulling nicotine from that cigarette into her black, tar-stained young lungs.

I walked past in a state of bliss, and after scoring that astounding appetizer, I went inside the grandstand building then looped around to the next door so I could go back outside and make the same incredible journey again. I did this three times, watching this girl continue to take intense and lengthy drags from that cigarette every time, always in rapid fire succession. I kept thinking to myself that the filter was gonna burn her fingers she was dragging so hard. After the third time walking past her, I noticed she went back into the grandstand, much as I wanted to see her fire up another smoke.

I almost wanted to go visit that grandstand exhibit so I could have her help me “try out those harnesses”. If the same thing had happened today, I probably would try it. The thought of this girl fastening something on my body ripe with the stench of fresh cigarette smoke still gets me excited 11 years later.  And amazingly enough I still had one sighting that day that would be even better.

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MNSF #13. A Family of Smokers Watches a Parade

This was my first epic sighting from the epic Minnesota State Fair year of 2006, a sighting that I occurred in the early afternoon and which loved at the time but has continued to grow on me in my fantasies since.

This sighting transpired near the haunted house on the heavily traveled Judson Avenue on the south side of the fairgrounds. It started simply enough with a modestly attractive 19-20ish dark blond dragging on a freshly lit all-white. As I began to visually track her, I noticed she was in the company of a much more attractive college-age brunette wearing a pair of white sunglasses and denim capris and dangling her own freshly lit all-white from the corner of her mouth, looking as badass as is possible for a girl to look. The two girls progressed across the street and my eyes were glued on that long-haired dark brunette carrying on with one of the longest-lasting dangles I’ve seen from a young girl as she walked, almost as if showing off to the world just how beautiful it is for a gorgeous young girl to smoke a cigarette. It must have been a good 45 seconds before she removed that dangling cigarette from her mouth in time to meet up with what I assumed to be her parents and younger sister. Both parents were smoking, and it was clear I had come across a family of smokers.  Already breathless, this sighting was only getting started.

The dirty blonde didn’t look like the other two girls, so I’m not sure if she was part of the family or just a friend, but the sighting would soon add a third player thanks to her as the brunette kid sister, who looked about 18, opened the backpack of the dirty blonde and extracted her pack of Marlboro Lights, wasting no time lighting herself up.  So here we had two long-haired dark brunettes, one likely 20 and the other 18, who were almost certainly sisters and looked exactly alike publicly smoking with their family and friends. Then, a virtual storybook metaphor for this excitement ensued when the Minnesota State Fair’s daily afternoon parade was approaching the scene.

The family of smokers, all still in possession of burning cigarettes, got up to leave, apparently to follow the parade. The younger brunette was in the front of the crowd, so I couldn’t see her very well but I was more interested in the older sister who performed that incredible long-distance dangle only minutes earlier. The girl was right in front of me, dragging copiously from her cigarette and coming to a stop facing the parade float.  I could tell from the inverted filter that she was smoking a Parliament, occasionally using her cell phone to snap pictures from the parade, deftly balancing both the phone and her cigarette in one hand.   She took a couple of final drags before squashing out the cigarette beneath her shoe finally bringing to a close this eventful sighting.  It would have been great to see a little more out of the younger sister but even so it was a bona fide epic that stuck with me for months of future fantasies (particularly that dangle)  and I’m eternally grateful to the Minnesota State Fair for making it happen.


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MNSF #14. Closing Out The Day With An Amazing Trio of Teen Blonds in Shorts

I had pulled off a second abbreviated day at the 2009 Minnesota State Fair on a sunny Sunday during Labor Day weekend, and the day was going very well.  Nonetheless, I was approaching the final 20 minutes of the day before the agreed-upon departure time at 6 p.m. and I still hadn’t had an epic sighting that day or on any of my trips to the Minnesota State Fair in 2009 for that matter.  But the girls of the MNSF would come through in the clutch.

I was heading southbound from the grandstand area to the beer gardens. Approaching me was a trio of teenage girls, all very wholesome-looking and not particularly raising my radar as potential smokers as our footsteps continued to draw us closer to one another. The girl on the left dominated my attention because she was so beautiful, about 16 with the face of an angel and curly blond hair with pinkish streaks flowing past her shoulders, wearing an ultrafeminine pink tanktop and an equally feminine pair of white shorts. She began to rummage around in her purse, but I’d been seeing girls like her rummage around in their purses for cell phones all day and it was gonna be the same story with this girl, I told myself….But just in case, I looked over my shoulder as she passed me to see if maybe, just maybe, she was gonna be the one wholesome-looking teen beauty queen I would see all day who retrieved something from her purse that wasn’t a cell phone. I remember saying to myself in a state of near shock, “Oh my God!” as her left hand extracted a pack of Marlboro Smooths and I quickly turned around……

I made a point of walking in front of them briefly to get a closer look. There was a definite pecking order to their beauty. The blond was by far the prettiest looking like an absolute angel, while the tall girl in the middle was modestly attractive, and the girl on the opposite end was a plain jane, with obvious acne issues covered up by a thick layer of makeup. After sufficiently viewing their faces, I held back to follow them once again. They may have had varying quality to their 16-year-old faces, but all had equally impressive bodies to observe from the rear, all decked out in shorts. After about 10-15 seconds of these general observations, the beautiful teen blond finally got around to inserting the cigarette into her mouth. She let that thing dangle unlit from the corner of her mouth for a good 20 seconds while digging through her purse, apparently unable to find her lighter. She then had to recruit the least attractive friend to find a different lighter in her own purse, which she soon did. At last, this beauty had everything she needed to spark up her cigarette….

She brought that thing to life and started dragging. The look of pleasure on that pretty face as she filled her bloodstream with desperately needed nicotine made my heart melt, but as I was taking in this amazing display, she managed to catch me off guard again by removing the cigarette from her mouth and then hacking up a lugie so large and juicy that it literally splashed when it hit the pavement.  As I walked past it, I had to admire that generous pool of saliva deposited from her gorgeous smoky mouth.

She took a couple more drags, both with impressive frequency and better-than-expected volume to her exhales coming from a girl so young. At this point, she handed the cigarette to the tall girl in the middle who got her first drag. She then stood there with the cigarette in hand for nearly a minute before finally taking her next drag. The hot chick, having none of this lengthy spans between drags by her friend, all but swiped the cigarette from the other girl’s hand after that second drag and then took three rapid-fire drags of her own. It was a thing of absolute beauty to behold.

Naturally, a sighting would normally have been best if all three had been smoking, but the dynamic of this specific shared-cigarette sighting added to its allure. The primary reason is that the hottest of the two girls smoked about 80% of the cigarette and completely upstaged the taller girl. The third girl who provided the lighter, strangely enough, never got her hands on the cigarette. It was just the two prettier girls. I was in a position to walk directly behind the cluster of girls at points, taking in a few of their exhales directly into my face and admiring from closeup their trio of perfect teenage asses bouncing and wiggling in their skimpy shorts with each step, with flawless legs extending from those shorts without even a trace of cellulite on them. At other points, I would move more to their right side and observe their drags and exhales. Again, the beautiful blonde upstaged the tall light brunette friend on both fronts.  Damn she was sexy.

After dominating the cigarette for most of the walk, the blond handed over the cigarette to the tall friend for the last two drags. She would take those two drags and then crush out the cigarette under her flip-flop. I was a little surprised to see it was a cork filter as I walked past as I always thought Marlboro Smooths were all-whites. I have not been able to get the image of those three teenage butts wiggling in front of me, especially the white-shorted ass that belonged to my favorite sighting of the 2009 Minnesota State Fair.

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MNSF #15. Wholesome College Babe Performs Best Talking Exhale Of All-Time

I was on an incredible roll during the noon hour on my first Saturday at the 2011 Minnesota State Fair, and that roll would hit its apex with my favorite sighting of the two days at the MNSF.  I was navigating the seating area on the east side behind the grandstand, always a great source of sightings.  At the furthest end of a burm area that people always sit on while taking a break was an 18ish blond girl of the highest magnitude of wholesomeness placing a cigarette in her mouth and lighting up, immediately resulting in my heart skipping a beat.  There was a middle-aged couple seated to her right and she started talking to the woman, leading me to assume it was her mother, but I would later discover that was not the case.  I boogied on over there and as luck would have it, there was wide-open seating to her right and I sat about three feet from her, positioning myself for a front-row seat to greatness.

At first she looked my way, as if letting me know “I’m smoking a cigarette here, shooter.  If you don’t want to be around it, you’d best find another place to sit”.  But she never said anything, and watching her made my heart melt as she was incredibly wholesome.  She had such a gentle face, a look that was accentuated by a girlish plastic headband holding down the front of her hair and a tight, adorable little blond ponytail on the back of her head.  She wore a tan tanktop and olive green shorts that were very small and perfectly framed her awesomely slender figure. She was just too cute for words…and that was before I saw upclose the first drag at which point I fell completely in love…..

The cigarette went into her mouth and she took a mesmerizing six-second drag.  I was taken aback by how long that cigarette stayed in her mouth as she pulled from it, moments before she released a blast of smoke from her lungs that the wind caught just right to drift straight into my face.  I was toying around with my camera phone hoping to get a photo, but in this case I was simply too close.  There would be no way she wouldn’t know exactly what I had just done and she may even hear the shutter on the camera snap, so I held back and simply enjoyed the show….and what a show it was!

From afar this girl had a complete baby face without a hint of imperfections, but as close as I was, whenever she took one of her deep drags, I could see very well-defined draw lines already formed on her lips as she took her rapist drags.  It was clear that this girl had been sucking intensely on the filters of cigarettes for a very long time as it was taking its toll on her beautiful face in the most adorable way.  She only took that first six-second drag, but subsequent drags were still impressive, always revealing those draw lines around her mouth and always followed up with a look of orgasmic pleasure on her face for as good as that cigarette smoke felt inside her black lungs.  She would then tilt her head slightly upward and exhaled a tight plume of smoke that mostly came from her mouth with just a little bit of nasal residue.  But the sighting would rise to a new dimension when she would then pick up her cell phone to place a call, revealing a cute little girlish lighter that was sitting next to her by the cell phone…..

“Hey what up!” she answered with a definite smoker’s husk to her voice that didn’t match her girly girl look in the least.  From there I would eavesdrop on her conversation in which the person had apparently “stayed over at my mom’s last night”.   The more I listened, the more it became clear the middle-aged couple to her right was not her parents but perfect strangers….and the reason she probably spoke to them when she lit her cigarette was to warn them she was gonna stink the entire area up with her cigarette smoke.  Anyway, the conversation went on about “taking care of her birds” and then she talked about how “it’s hard for her to even go home now because home doesn’t feel like home anymore”….and that she “really loves Alexandria”.  Alexandria is a community college town about an hour and a half northwest of the Minneapolis-St. Paul area and I’m assuming by her comments this girl was going into her second year of classes there and had been living there for the summer, but was home in the Twin Cities for the fair as it also became clear that she was working in some capacity at the fair, probably as a vendor for whatever her summer job was.  With all that context out there, fascinating as it was to listen to, let’s get back to the smoking show which was about to take an epic turn….

She had taken a couple of nice drags early into this conversation that fit into her established style.  But one of her final drags from the cigarette was the prime catalyst for what made this the best sighting of the day.  After another extended rapist drag, she began talking to the friend on the phone and proceeded with far and away the most amazing talking exhale I’ve ever seen.  I knew I was in the presence of greatness immediately as I saw the first wisp of smoke escape her face.   Her pleasured body was very slowly releasing the contents of her lungs as she talked, and I mean very slowly, with swirls of smoke spilling from both her mouth and nose one small burst at a time for 10 seconds.  The smoke spurts were literally doing pinwheels and curlycues as they escaped her face for a seemingly endless parade, and even after all that slow-motion smoke release, a huge remaining blast of smoke fired out of her nose when she finished talking.  I would have paid $1,000 to exchange bodily fluids with this girl at this point.

Unfortunately, the show was almost over as she took one more drag and then crushed out the cigarette on the burm next to her and let it fall to the ground.  She wrapped up the phone call and then put her girlish lighter and her phone in a bag and then she put on her shoulders and got up to walk away, likely back to whatever fair vendor she was working for.  She had to have been stinky as hell when she returned to work.  I watched as that slender body of hers pressed forward, her adorable ass wiggling in those skimpy green shorts and that tight little ponytail bouncing a little on the top of her head as she walked.   Now when she dropped her cigarette butt, it fell into a crack but I was nonetheless able to identify it as a cork filter Camel Blue.  As I’m reminded at least once every few hours and sometimes even more often, my opinion was reinforced after watching this girl what a blessed place the Minnesota State Fair really is.

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MNSF #16. Blondie Holds Up Her Little Friends On The Midway

The 2001 Minnesota State Fair was the first day where I spent almost the entire day exploring the grounds solo, unleashed from the shackles of my parents’ presence, with the singular objective of spotting and cataloging the sightings of attractive young smokers.  While the day was going reasonably well as I approached the 6:00 hour, I had to yet to score a sighting that really grabbed me where I lived until I made my final midway run of the day.

Sometimes a walk through the midway yields results at the Minnesota State Fair, other times not. But this was the first time in my new role as an active fairgrounds fetisher that it definitely did. A group of three 15-ish girl-next-door types sat down on an open bench in front of me. I had a good feeling about them for whatever reason, so I was pleased to see a bench about 10 yards away was open and allowed me a glimpse directly at the girls. It still felt like a longshot though as I awaited a light-up, because they looked so darned wholesome.

Imagine my unbridled delight when the cutest of the three, this adorable 15-ish blond in a tanktop and jean shorts with the face of an angel, opened her purse and proceeded to extract a pack of Marlboro Lights. She lit up and enjoyed her cigarette, putting on a perfect display of precocious smoking from what I suspect was a fairly new smoker. None of the other girls lit up, which actually added to this sighting. Here was this angellic-looking young blond smoker who, despite the fact that her friends didn’t share her love of cigarettes, had decided that no human companionship could rival the friendship nicotine offered her.

She was so adorable sitting there inhaling smoke from the cigarette and exhaling it with the gusto of an eager “smoker-in-training.” The other girls seemed to grow progressively more restless as their stinky little friend sat there enjoying her cigarette. They weren’t specifically beckoning her to leave, but you could tell they wanted her smoke break to end far sooner than she was willing to to wrap it up. As cutie finally finished her cigarette and got up to leave, following her friends back into the midway, it really struck me how special this sighting was with this most unlikely smoker holding up her friends’ fun out of a selfish need to fill her own adorable little body with stinky carcinogens.  Not to say I couldn’t see a sighting like this again, but looking back 13 years later there’s just something very 2001ish about it that gives me a woozy feeling recollecting as a trophy from the good old days.

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MNSF #17. One Sighting, Seven Blistering Smoker Babes

Yet another epic classic from the 2007 Minnesota State Fair, this one coming around 6 p.m. and well after the day had found its stride. The sightings were coming at an almost dizzying pace by this hour and it was becoming clear that 2006′s robust numbers were no fluke as I already crossed the century mark for sightings on the day.  The sighting with which I passed the century threshold was merely mediocre as was sighting #101, but as I passed the northwest corner of the beer gardens I hit 24-karat gold….

In the course of less than 20 seconds, I would observe not only Sighting #102 of the day, but also Sighting #103, #104, #105, #106, #107, AND #108……all in one fell swoop. Seven incredibly hot college age babes, each wielding cigarettes. I counted four of them in my initial pass, but three more of the group of eight proceeded to light themselves up in the seconds to come. Only one girl of the eight was not smoking during the course of my observation. I don’t ever recall seeing a cluster of hotties this large simultaneously smoking at the State Fair or any other venue for that matter.

All of the girls were stunners, decked out in stiletto heels and dressed in glamorous attire, clearly all out to impress on their night at the state fair, but three of them really stood out. A dark-haired brunette who was the prettiest in the group, a light brunette who was also stunning, and an uber-glamorous blond who wasn’t the kind of natural beauty the other two were but compensated for it with a skimpy brown leather top and short skirt.  I’m a sucker for this kind of outfit, so I gotta say she was my favorite of the bunch.  I was grateful to have a couple of minutes to take this all in, standing there and beholding the scenery and the incessant exhalation of smoke coming from at least seven attractive female mouths.  If there was a downside to this sighting, it was that it was impossible to give any single girl the focus she deserved because there were so many of them smoking.

The cluster of girls left their spot near the beer gardens and walked northward in unison. The sheer number of nicotine addicts meant a permanent trail of fumes was left in their aftermath and it was an absolute joy getting the chance to walk through tailwinds amidst the clicking of the girls’ high-heeled footwear proceeding down the pavement.  It really struck me how amazing this day was going for me as I broke away from this cluster of addicted hotties….and walked away from this sighting with a sensation of not only satisfaction because of the epic sighting, but relief that my ongoing paranoia of the perils of continued anti-tobacco legislation rendering the habit obsolete.  It wasn’t gonna happen if these girls had anything to say about it.

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